Ephesians 4:17--5:21 · Living as Children of Light
Lost Baggage: Losing Your Baggage
Ephesians 4:17--5:21
Sermon
by James Merritt
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If you travel by air with any frequence, it has likely happened to you. A bar-coded tag is placed on your checked bag at their airport counter and you watch it wisk away down a conveyor belt, presumably to be loaded onto the same plane on which you are about to fly.

Some hours later, you arrive at your destination, and make your way to baggage claim. There, you stand with 200 other passengers, waiting as the carousel went round and round almost magically spitting out piece after piece of luggage. One by one each passenger spotted their luggage, pulled it off with a smile and heads for their hotel. The last bag appears on the carousel—and it is not yours.

There you stand in the airport. No clean clothes, no toiletries, no underwear, nothing but the clothes on your back. Before you think you are somehow unique, realize that airlines lose about 26 million bags each and every year. So despite the terrible inconvenience, the reality is that you are just a small part of a much bigger statistic.

You might feel like the guy who was standing in line to buy an airline ticket. He stepped up to the counter with three pieces of luggage. He said, “Ma’am I want this first suit case to go to Phoenix, the second suitcase to go to Seattle, and the third one to go to New York.” Dumfounded, the attendant said, “Sir, I am sorry, but we can’t do that.” The man said, “I don’t know why not. You did it last week.”

There is nothing worse than losing baggage… unless it is baggage you need to lose. The truth of the matter is most of us have some type of baggage we carry around with us all the time that we need to lose. It weighs down our relationships with our friends, family, co-workers and neighbors. Often, it destroys marriages, dissolves friendships, and damages our abilities to relate properly to God. That is why we are introducing a series today we are calling, “Lost Baggage.” We are going to deal with the four biggest relationship killers that we all struggle with such as the baggage of bitterness, unresolved anger, a judgmental spirit, and a critical disposition.

Every time you bring two people together you are going to add baggage. Everybody brings some baggage into a relationship. The key to building and maintaining a healthy relationship is:

A.) Being able to recognize you have baggage
B.) Being willing to lose it

I am going to give you the Key Take Away for this entire series. I am going to share with you something that I know is true. I’ve experienced it in my own life and I’ve seen many other people experience it in theirs. Key Take Away: You can lose your baggage.

In fact, if you are a Christian, a follower of Jesus Christ, you must lose your baggage, because we have been called to a higher standard in our relationship with others. We have a witness to maintain. We have a name to uphold. We have a reputation to guard, because we don’t just represent ourselves; we represent the Lord who died on a cross, who was raised from the dead and who we say has made a radical difference in our life. That difference needs to be manifested in our relationships with one another and our relationships with other people.

I know some of you are thinking, “I don’t know how heavy your baggage is and I don’t know how long you’ve been carrying it around. I don’t know how much you are attached to it or it is attached to you and you are thinking, “I can’t lose my baggage.” I know you can because a man writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit said you could. [Turn to Ephesians 4]. There are two verses we are going to study this morning that if they were followed, both in the church and outside the church, the transformation and relationships (marital, political, national and inter-national) would be absolutely staggering. Paul begins by saying, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” (Ephesians 4:31, NIV)

I love the way this translation puts it. Paul just simply says, “Do you have any bitter feelings toward anybody? Get rid of them. You still mad, ticked off at somebody, because they really messed you over? Stop it. Do you still find yourself in your mind hanging people by their toenails in hot acid? Cursing them out. Calling them every name in the book? No more. I know you may be thinking that is easy for someone to say. It wasn’t for Paul.

This was a man writing from a prison who had been unjustly incarcerated, unfairly treated and who eventually was going to lose his life simply for telling the truth. Yet, you can look with a microscope or a telescope and you will find no bitterness, no rage, no unresolved anger, and no ill will in his heart. Paul was saying in effect, “I lost my baggage and you can lose yours.” No, Paul didn’t know your story and neither do I. I know that I am speaking to people in this audience today who are literally in bondage to the master of bitterness. You are bitter toward God because the tragedy that happened in your life that He didn’t prevent. You are bitter toward a spouse who left you to raise the children on a meager salary. You are bitter toward a company that fired you with no severance even though you served them faithfully for many years. You are bitter toward a parent who physically or sexually abused you. You are bitter toward a father who never you any approval or a mother who never affirmed her love for you. Maybe you are even bitter toward the church because you have seen how hypocritical some church people can be.

Bitterness cannot only ruin your life, but it can follow you to the grave. There is a true story about a 94 year old lady by the name of Hazel Von Jeschki. She is what used to be referred to an as “old maid” who never married. At her funeral her pastor felt it necessary to put a note in the order of service because of something unusual she requested.

This woman who had never married had left very specific hand-writing instructions for her funeral service such as the song she wanted sung and the scripture she wanted read. But her final instructions were these, “There will be no male pallbearers. They wouldn’t take me out when I was alive and I don’t want them to take me out when I am dead.” It is amazing how some people live with baggage, die with baggage, and even spend eternity with their baggage. Thankfully, Paul gives us in one of the most powerful sentences in the Bible the secret on losing your baggage, how to blow the bitterness, get rid of the grudges, and free yourself from the prison of unforgiveness once and for all.

In case you are wondering what Easter has to do with this you are going to see today and over the next four weeks everything. Today, we are going to deal with one of the greatest benefits that comes from a risen Savior and that is forgiveness. It is because Jesus Christ is alive that we can have both the experience of forgiveness and the enablement of forgiveness.

Listen to this verse.

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32, NIV)

This is one of the three rules of forgiveness you will find in the Bible. Let me give them to you.

Rule #1 – You should forgive others the way you would want others to forgive you. That is the Golden rule.

Rule #2 – You will be forgiven the way you forgive others. Jesus said, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” That is God’s rule.

Rule #3 – The way you should forgive others is the way God has forgiven you. That is the Grace rule.

Forgiveness doesn’t come naturally, because it very rarely comes easily. The reason why is because of what the word means. The word “forgiveness” literally means, “to let go” or “to send away.” It refers to the cancellation of a debt. In essence, when somebody does you wrong they are in your debt. Forgiveness is your willingness, on your own, to simply write off the debt. It is a decision to cancel the debt. It is the willingness to simply say to a person who has done you wrong and owes you, “From now on you don’t owe me anymore.”

I won’t deny it. There is not a more difficult decision you make in life, at times, than to decide to forgive someone.

I promise there are many of you sitting there right now and you are saying, “If you only knew my story”, “If you only knew what you are asking of me”, “If you only knew the size of the debt that is owed to me”, “If you only knew the pain and the anguish and the heartache that I have been caused by this person or by these people and you are asking me simply to cancel that debt. Why should I do that?”

The motivation is found in two words, “Just As.” Both the motivation of forgiveness why you should forgive, and the model of forgiveness of how you should forgive is found in this sentence. We ought to forgive others just as God has forgiven us.

Do you really understand what happened Good Friday and Easter Sunday? On Good Friday, Jesus Christ paid for our sins by dying for them. In other words, He paid a debt He did not owe, because we owed a debt we could not pay. He paid our sin debt.

Do you know what happened on Easter Sunday when God raised His Son from the dead it was His way of saying, “I accept the payment and I am writing across everyone who will receive my forgiveness, ‘paid in full.’” Colossians 2:14 puts it this way,

“Having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross.” (Colossians 2:14, NIV)

God took the biggest debt ever incurred, which are the sins of everyone who has ever lived and let Jesus Christ pay for them and cancel them. No one ever owed a greater debt than we owe to God and no one will ever forgive a greater debt than Jesus did for us.

The simple reason why you ought to be a forgiving person is because you are a forgiven person. Only forgiven people are motivated to forgive. You forgive because you are forgiven and you are forgiven, because Christ died and was raised from the dead.

I know you are protesting, but you don’t know how much he hurt me. You don’t know what she did to me. Listen, you will never forgive if you always focus on those people who have hurt you. You will only forgive if you begin to focus on the One who died for you and was raised from the dead.

We are to forgive others just as God forgave us in Christ. How did God forgive us? If we are going to forgive others the way God has forgiven us then –

I. We Must Forgive Freely

Jesus Christ didn’t charge us anything even though He died for us. He didn’t extract a pound of flesh. He didn’t say, “I’ll take some revenge first.” He didn’t say, “First you’ll pay Me what you owe Me.” He didn’t say, “First you clean your life up and get your life together and then I will die for you.” He died for us freely. The only thing He asked in return for our forgiveness is repentance and surrender.

Some of you want to forgive the principal of the crime only after you’ve collected the interest of revenge. Before some people give they want their ounce of meat, their pound of flesh and their quart of blood. True forgiveness carries no strings attached, no fine print at the bottom of the contract and no conditions.

II. We Must Forgive Fully

Forgiveness is not fractional. Do you realize that if God refused to forgive just one part, of one fraction, of one decimal point, of one sin none of us would have a chance of having eternal life? God not only forgives all of our sins (plural), but he forgives all of our sin (singular). When you forgive someone you must forgive them fully.

Some of you have cancer. Some of us will be diagnosed with cancer one day. You go to the doctor and he diagnoses you with cancer. You don’t ask him how you got it. You don’t ask him what put it there. You don’t ask him if you can live with it. What do you ask him? “Can you get it out?” You don’t want part of it out. You want all of it out. If you are going to forgive someone you must forgive them fully. You must get all of the bitterness and all of the rage and all of the anger and all of the malice out.

III. We Must Forgive Finally

When you cancel a debt it can never be brought back up. You can never collect on that debt again. That is why the Bible says in Jeremiah 31:34, “And no longer shall each one teach his neighbor and each his brother, saying, ‘Know the Lord,’ for they shall all know me, from the least of them to the greatest, declares the Lord. For I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more.” (Jeremiah 31:34, ESV)

What that simply means is that God doesn’t hold grudges. He never throws our sin back in our face. He wipes the slate clean. He wipes it clean for one reason which is because Jesus died on the cross and He was raised from the dead.

Pastors, as you might imagine, often have interesting conversations while traveling. I believe this is because pastors naturally take an interest in people. This is a true story about a pastor who had just such a conversation with a man named “John.” For the purpose of this story, we will disguise this person’s real identity, though I assure you all of this actually happened. John was a soldier, and was headed to New York to see his girlfriend and their son for a couple of days before he would go back for a little more training only to ship out to Afghanistan for 10 months. After some small talk John asked the pastor what he did for a living, and the pastor replied.

Seeing this as an opening, the pastor asked, “John, where are you on your spiritual journey?” He said, “I don’t believe in God and I don’t believe in the Bible.” He said it with a finality and an anger that startled the pastor. So the pastor said, “Tell me your story.” Then the ride began. Here was his story in a nutshell.

His father committed suicide when he was 3 years old. He was raised by a mom who in his words was verbally abusive and was always looking for a reason to beat him. Just when you thought the story probably couldn’t get any worse, the real tragedy unfolded.

When he was 9 years old he witnessed a 13 year old boy murder a 4 year old boy. He froze in terror as he saw this friend of his, with whom he had been staying that day sexually assault this 4 year old boy, do terrible things to him leaving him for dead. The 13 year old boy saw him, ran over to him and threatened to kill him if he told anybody.

For three days he lived in terror, afraid by day that this boy would find him and kill him, and unable to sleep at night because of the images that were burned into his mind of the murder of this 4 year old boy. They found the body 3 days later. For some reason, the 13 year old kid confessed. It came out this boy had witnessed the murder and so he became the prosecution’s star witness. He had to go through a grueling trial and recount every single moment of that event. To this day he sees him in his mind and it plays in his mind and it wakes him up at night.

Listening to the tragic life of John, the pastor fights back tears. Can you imagine yourself seated next to such a person? What would you say to someone who had endured such tragedy? What hope could you share with them? But the story is not over. At 18, he gets a girl pregnant and has a daughter. Now, he has child support payments to make and no job. Finally, he joins the Army and while he is in the Army he meets another girl in New York, gets her pregnant and has a little boy who is now 2 years old.

A month before this airplane flight, his girlfriend calls him to tell him that she has to go to work and she does not know who to leave the 2 year old boy with. He told her to leave him with his mother or her mother. She informs him that both mothers are unavailable and he says, “Quit your job or do whatever you have to do, but don’t just leave our son with anybody.” She calls him back a little later and tells him she is going to leave him with a girlfriend of hers who is very reliable and a very sweet lady. The only problem was she lied to him. The girlfriend had to work also so she left him with the girlfriend’s boyfriend who proceeds (according to the little boy later) to sexually assault his 2 year old son.

What do you think of John’s experiences to this point? What would the pain and sin this man endured do to him? Can you imagine the rage, bitterness, and the anger that is literally oozing out of his eyeballs? In the military, John became a Mixed Martial Arts expert and that he had won the Army championship. With tears in his eyes he told talked about how he hated leaving home, because he didn’t want to be away from his son and his daughter the way his dad had left him. When the pastor asked him why he didn’t try to get relieved from duty in Afghanistan he said that he had volunteered to go. “Why?”, asked the pastor. He said, “I am a machine-gunner. I know I will probably get a chance to kill some people over there. Pastor, I really need to kill somebody.”

Most pastors, before hearing such a story, would have planned to say something along the lines of, “John, God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life.” For some reason, now that you have heard this story as well, that doesn’t seem like a good way to introduce God to him.

As the plane lands and taxies to the gate, John is looking out the window with tears in his eyes. The pastor is looking forward, eyes closed and praying, “What do I say to this young solider?” Then it hit him. The pastor looked at him and said, “John, I am sorry for the life that you have lived and I am sorry for the tragedies you’ve endured and for the junk you have had to go through, but I want you to hear me. If you go through life without getting this bitterness and this anger and this rage resolved in your heart you are either going to wind up doing something you regret or you are going to live a miserable life.” He said, “Yes, Pastor I know.” Then the pastor said this: “The only solution to your rage and to your bitterness is the resurrected Christ. Let me tell you why.”

“You don’t believe in God, but you don’t hate Christians?” He said, “That is right.” The pastor said, “There was a man who did believe in God, but he hated Christians. His name was Paul. He had as much rage in his heart as you do in yours, but for different reasons. When he met the risen Christ his hatred was replaced by God’s love, his grudges were replaced by God’s grace and his bitterness was replaced by God’s blessing. What God did for him God can do for you.

What was said to that solider I say to you today. There is only one hope for this world, for this nation, for our homes, marriages, and our children and it is the risen Christ. We can be forgiven. We can be forgivers if that risen Christ lives in our hearts. Because of Christ, you can Lose Your Baggage.

ChristianGlobe Networks, Inc., Collected Sermons, by James Merritt