Luke 2:41-52 · The Boy Jesus at the Temple
A Word to Busy Parents
Luke 2:41-52
Sermon
by King Duncan
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Today we’re going to be talking about the Christian family. I believe most of us will agree that raising a family can be challenging. In fact, raising a family changes with each baby. Someone has made a list of the ways having a second and third child is different from having your first. See if any of you can identify with these differences:

For example, if you are a mom, your clothes change. With the first baby you begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your gynecologist confirms your pregnancy. With the second baby you wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. With your third baby your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes. . .

And your attitude toward germs changes. With the first baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it. With the second baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby’s bottle. With the third baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

And your attitude toward going out changes. With the first baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times. With the second baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached. With the third baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

And your attitude toward being with the baby changes. With the first baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby. With the second baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn’t squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby. With the third baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

Even your attitude toward swallowing coins changes. When the first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays. When a second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for coin to pass. When a third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance! (1)

Families are wonderful. But they are challenging . . . even Jesus’ family was challenging.

It would not surprise any of us to know that Jesus came from a very devout Jewish family. Every year they went to Jerusalem for the Passover observance. We know from stories about his birth, that his parents trusted God. We know he was versed in the Hebrew Scriptures. He confounded the scholars in the temple with his questions concerning scripture when he was only twelve years of age. Passages from the Hebrew Bible were on his tongue throughout his ministry. Probably this was a tribute to Joseph. In the Jewish home the father had the responsibility of training his son in the faith. We know that Joseph did his job well.

Mary did her job well too. I read recently a humorous story about a young man who on his graduation from high school was chosen to give the commencement speech. He began by reading from his prepared text: “I want to talk about my mother and the wonderful influence she has had on my life. She is a shining example of parenthood, and I love her more than words could ever do justice.”

At this point he seemed to struggle for words. After a pause, he looked up with a sly grin and said, “Sorry, but it’s really hard to read my mother’s handwriting.” (2)

We know how important Mary and Jesus were to each other. One of the final acts that Jesus performed, even as he was being crucified, was to make certain that his mother was being taken care of.

Yet, while he was still a boy, there happened in Jerusalem an incident so extraordinary that it found a place in the New Testament. Perhaps it was related by one of Jesus’ brothers after his death and resurrection. We know that at least two of Jesus’ brothers were active in the early church. Perhaps it was they who told about the time Mary, Joseph and Jesus visited the temple at Jerusalem. Jesus was twelve years of age.

On their journey home, about a day’s journey from Jerusalem, Mary and Joseph discovered that Jesus wasn’t with them. There was a large crowd of kinsfolk and friends from their community traveling together and it was not unusual to be unable to find a boy of twelve. He was probably playing with other kids his age.

There was no reason for Mary and Joseph to miss Jesus. When they did, they headed back to Jerusalem to find out what in the world could have happened to him. They found him in the temple where he was amazing the scholars with his questions.

Mary scolded him. She had been concerned, as any mother would have been concerned. She asked her son, “Why did you worry us like this? We’ve been looking for you anxiously.”

Jesus answered, “Did you not know that I must be about my Father’s business?”

Luke tells us that Mary and Joseph didn’t really understand what Jesus meant by this, but he went home with them and was obedient to them. We are also told that Mary kept these things hidden in her heart, and that Jesus increased in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and man.

Can’t you imagine one of Jesus’ brothers telling this story much, much later and saying the family knew even then that there was something special about Jesus? Still, the family did not always know what to make of their oldest son. There were some things about Mary and Joseph’s family that may be true of yours.

For one thing, they had their disagreements. That’s not unusual, is it? Do members of your family disagree? Even if your family consists of just two people, there will be disagreements.

It would not the last time that there would be conflict between Jesus and his mother and his brothers. The next time is when Jesus begins his ministry. In Mark 3 we read that when his family heard about the controversy he was stirring with his new teachings, they went to take charge of him, for they said, “He is out of his mind” (v. 21). That was surely embarrassing for all concerned. But this was, after all, a real family. Even in the best of families there is disagreement.

At least they didn’t have social media to drive them further apart. Recently I read about a home show promoting new styles of homes which featured one dream house that allowed each family member to come in via a different entrance. Individuals could enjoy their smart phone or watch television or surf the internet in their own room and even choose separate kitchen facilities and bathrooms, so as not to interact with other family members. (3)

Somehow I could see some families for whom that would be appealing. Jesus’ family was much, much closer than that, but still there was disagreement.

Even in the healthiest of families, as children grow toward adulthood there is an inevitable distancing process that must take place. There comes a time for leaving Mom and Dad, a time for making one’s own way, for forging one’s own identity. So part of the conflict within families is a very natural process. We need not panic when hurtful words are spoken, when disturbing thoughts or ideas are expressed. It’s part of moving out, and that’s part of God’s plan. It happens even in the best of families.

But there is a second characteristic of Jesus’ family. They were always there for each other. No matter how old Jesus was or how many other people he influenced, he was still Mary’s son and they maintained that relationship. Sometimes it was a strained relationship but this is natural.

Notice the reaction of Mary and Jesus to the conflict in our story for the morning. After it was over, Luke tells us Jesus returned to Nazareth with his parents and was obedient to them. That doesn’t mean that there were never any arguments, but, as a teenager, he was an obedient son.

I hope our young people understand the value of obedience. I believe every young person in this room knows that ultimately Mom and Dad are on your side. When they say, “What we want is your best good,” they really mean it. Even though parents can make mistakes, and often do, what’s in their heart is what counts. Most young people appreciate that.

A recent survey of teenagers shows that most teenagers have a very positive feeling for their parents. Jesus had positive feelings about his parents.

From the other side of the familial divide, Mary scolded Jesus; but notice, she kept these things and pondered them in her heart. She loved her son. She wanted to understand him. She wanted to reach out to him. The picture the New Testament gives of this family is of a family in harmony. In such an environment Luke tells us that Jesus increased in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and man. That’s beautiful--a family that is always there for one another.

Some of you will remember the world famous British anthropologist Jane Goodall. She was the woman who spent a great deal of her life living with apes.

Did you know that Jane Goodall was born into quite a prominent family? In England she was known as Baroness Jane Goodall. But she left her safe, secure world to study apes. She spent more than thirty years in Africa and became the world’s top authority on chimpanzees. She writes about the support that helped her get started: “When I decided that the place for me was Africa, everybody said to my mother, ‘Why don’t you tell Jane to concentrate on something attainable?’ But I have a truly remarkable mother.

“When I was two years old, I took a crowd of earthworms to bed to watch how they wriggled in the bedclothes. How many mothers would have said ‘ugh’ and thrown them out the window?” asked Jane Goodall, “but mine said, ‘Jane, if you leave the worms here they’ll be dead in the morning. They need the earth.’ So I quickly gathered them up and ran with them into the garden. My mother always looked at things from my point of view.”

Says one author, “Seeing things from your child’s point of view is one of the most valuable ways to interact with your child. Periodically get down on the floor and play with your child. As you do, show by example how to play, how to share, how to interact, how to cooperate or compete in a friendly manner, and how to put away toys or organize a play space. What you do, your child will do!” (4)

Good families are always there for each other.  And good parents take time to be sensitive to their children’s needs.

Many of you remember what it was like to have small children. You mothers remember what it was like to be sensitive to the slightest sound of a baby’s cry. As our children grow we may not hear sounds in the night quite as well, but still we must train ourselves to listen. It’s much easier to hear a three-year-old in the middle of the night than to hear the silent scream of a 13-year-old whose sense of self-worth has been crushed at school by a catty friend or an unthinking teacher.

Good parenting begins with sensitivity; sensitivity and sharing; keeping the lines of communication open and the dialogue flowing. Sometimes we make a mistake of doing all the talking and not really listening. Even more important, of course, is simply being present--taking the time to be available to listen.  This is so important.

Someone has noted that there are only 940 Saturdays between the day your child is born and the time he or she turns 18. That’s a good reminder to cherish the time you have with your children and to use it wisely. (5)

In James Patterson’s best selling novel Suzanne’s Diary for Nicholas--the story of a busy mother and doctor named Suzanne, who is terminally ill because of a heart condition--we learn how Suzanne makes dramatic changes to structure her life in a way that balances work with relationships. As expected, she dies at a young age, and eventually her husband remarries. The stepmother finds a diary that Suzanne kept for her son, Nicholas. In the diary she finds these words of wisdom:

“Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends, and integrity. And you’re keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls--family, health, friends, and integrity--are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, or perhaps even shattered. And once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will have the beginnings of balance in your life.” (6)

I titled this message “A Word to Busy Parents.” I know many of you are quite busy, but think of those four glass balls--family, health, friends, and integrity, and especially that first ball, family. It is so very fragile.

A pastor was telling about a Sunday school class for parents of young preschoolers that decided to rename itself. They kicked around several possibilities, such as Seekers or Searchers or maybe Learners. But all of these seemed too removed from the everyday wear-and-tear of their lives. Finally, one idea rose to the top. It was simple, truthful, inclusive, and playful. 

As the pastor walked by their classroom, he saw the name on the door. The laminated sign simply read: “Tired Parents Class.” And that said it all. (7)

These young adults were tired, but they were committed to the most important task that God has given to us--to prepare our children for living in an evermore complex world. Proverbs 22:6 says, ‘Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” That’s more valid today than it has ever been before.

I know that some of you would be candidates for the “Tired Parents Class.” Nobody said being a parent would be easy. It wasn’t easy for Mary and Joseph and they had the best child the world has ever known. But it is the most important task that is assigned to any person. Let your offspring know that you will always be there for them, regardless of the situation. And continually seek to be sensitive to their needs. Raising a family is a glass ball. If it is dropped, it can shatter. So take care. Handle it gently and with love. Someday you will thank God for such a wonderful gift.


1. Adapted from Laugh & Lift, http://www.laughandlift.com.

2. Contributed. Source unknown.

3. Richard Watson, Future Files: A Brief History of the Next 50 Years.

4. God’s Devotional Book for Mothers (Colorado Springs: Cook Communications Ministries, 2005), p. 252.

5. From No Regrets Parenting by Harley Rotbart, MD (Andrews McMeel Publishing) Reader’s Digest (Reader’s Digest USA).

6. James Patterson, Suzanne’s Diary for Nicholas (New York: Warner, 2001), p. 20. Cited in Randy Frazee, Making Room For Life (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2003), pp. 111-112.    

7. The Rev. Dr. James Lamkin, http://day1.org/6378-when_life_comes_at_you.

Dynamic Preaching, Collected Sermons, by King Duncan