Mark 10:35-45 · The Request of James and John
When God Says, “No”
Mark 10:35-45
Sermon
by Steven Molin
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There is a candy shop in the city of Keystone, South Dakota, just a few hundred yards down the mountain from that infamous Mount Rushmore monument. I can't tell you the name of that candy store, but I can certainly recall the sign on the counter that stands at just about eyeball-level for the average seven-year-old. The sign says this: "If Mom says, ‘No,' ask Grandma!"

Within the obvious humor of that single sentence, there are two truths revealed. The first, and more obvious of the two, is that all grandparents are a soft touch! They look at their children's children, and they melt with love and pride, and then pretty much anything that their grandchild asks for is granted. A case in point: We were spending some time with my parents at their cabin near Danbury, Wisconsin, one summer, and after a particularly successful day on the lake, we were having fish for supper. But my daughter doesn't like fish, you see, so she asked her grandma to make her spaghetti. And my mother did it! With meatballs! Like I said, grandparents are a soft touch!

The second truth is more subtle than the first. The second truth says that sometimes, parents must say, "No." We don't do it to be mean, to be disagreeable, or simply to exert our authority; we do it because we love these little ones in our care, and their health and safety is dependent upon us. So when little Susy asks for chocolate before dinner, we must tell her, "No." Or when eighth grade Billy asks to go to an R-rated movie, we must tell him, "No." And when our children want to run barefoot in the snow, we tell them, "Absolutely not!" All of this is in the unwritten job description of parenthood.

I want you to consider for a few moments today that God sometimes says, "No," to us for the very same reasons. Not because God is mean, or because he wants to exert his authority, but rather, because God loves the little ones in his care, and our very lives are dependent upon him. Wherever you are on life's journey today, may you know God's tender touch upon your life ... in the days when prayers are answered ... and in the days when you think they are not.

A good prayer would be: "Lord Jesus, we go through this life thinking that we know what's good for us. May you interrupt such self-sufficient thought, and guide us to those things that are not simply good for us, but those which are the best. In your name we pray. Amen."

In the gospel lesson that is ours today, Jesus is continuing on his way to Jerusalem, where he would soon die on the cross. But the disciples didn't get it, you see; the disciples never seemed to get it. And maybe that's why two of Jesus' closest friends, James and John by name, felt comfortable to approach the Savior and say to him "Teacher, we want you to do anything we ask of you." Such boldness! Such self-centeredness on the part of these disciples! "Lord, we want a blank check. We want what we want, and we want it now!"

If our children had said this to us, we would surely send them to "time out." But Jesus was so patient with them. "What is it [exactly] that you want me to do for you?" he asked. And the disciples said, "When you come into your kingdom, we want the seats of honor." They did not realize the sacrifice that awaited them just around the corner. The disciples could not see the big picture, so they settled for the narrow one. But Jesus knew better, and he told them so. "You don't know what you're asking," he said. "The answer is, ‘No.' " I am sure James and John were upset at Jesus for denying their request, but I am quite certain that it all made sense to them on that first Good Friday, when they realized that Jesus was merely protecting them from future pain.

And it seems to be that way with our children, as well. As they grow older, they, too, begin to recognize the value of the way we disciplined them. And as they have children of their own, we watch them battle with their kids on the very same issues we battled with them. It is divine retribution at its best! Ultimately, they see the big picture that they could not see as children. Perspective, they say, is everything.

This is a roundabout way of bringing me to the topic of prayer. Those times when we get down on our knees and cry out to God a demand that sounds strangely similar to that of James and John. "God, I want you to do whatever I ask!" Heal my friend ... give me that job ... make her love me ... save my marriage ... help me win this game ... bring me safely home. Prayers come in all shapes and sizes and degrees of urgency, but essentially, they are all the same. "Lord, I want you to do whatever I ask." I've prayed those prayers; haven't you? And they are not bad prayers, you understand. In fact, when we pray, we are doing exactly what Jesus has invited us to do. The fatal flaw comes when we wait to see if God will answer those prayers; if God will answer those prayers.

It seems to me that God always answers prayer. God always answers prayer, but when the answer is one we don't want, we tend to think it's a non-answer. What's more difficult for you; when the answer is, "No," or when there is no answer? For the remainder of our time together this morning, let me try to describe the ways that God answers prayer, and how those answers affect our lives.

Now, the first way that God answers prayer, of course, is with a resounding, "Yes!" When I was a young pastor in my first parish, a young college coed who grew up in our church was involved in a serious car accident. She was a beautiful, young woman, homecoming queen in both high school and college, but now, in the spring of her senior year, she lay in a hospital bed with her face fractured. And not just fractured. "Like eggshells" her doctor said. People coast to coast began praying for Michelle. And first, we prayed that she might simply live, and then, that she might walk again, and much later, that she would graduate from college. Well, God said, "Yes," to all of that, and, last I heard, Michelle is now married with children of her own. We all believed that our prayers had been answered. Everybody is a believer when God says, "Yes," you know!

But sometimes, God's answers are slow in coming. In his book, Winning the Values War in a Changing Culture, author Leith Andersen suggests that one of the ways God answers prayer is by saying, "Not yet." How many years did I pray for my parents to stop drinking? How many years have others prayed that they could conceive a child, or be healed of their depression, or find a marriage partner? How many centuries must we pray for peace in the Middle East? Perhaps you have been bringing an issue to God for years, but without resolution. Same prayer, same pain, same result. Keep praying, friends! Keep laying your requests before God's throne, so that his, "Not yet," may turn into a resounding, "Yes!" To do anything less would be to doubt the power and the grace of God.

Finally, I believe there are times when God says, "No." We may think God is just sleeping or that he isn't attentive to our prayers, but isn't it possible that God has answered our request, and that the answer is, "No"? And yet, that does not make it any easier to accept. We cannot understand why some peoples' prayers seem to be approved by God, and ours are not. And frankly, we don't care about "the big picture!" When we are desperate, we don't care about the appropriateness of our demand for health, or healing, or wholeness. What we care about is this loved one, who is the object of our prayer, and we want answers! When God's answer is, "No," we cannot understand, and we may never understand in this life.

When someone is hospitalized and we call the prayer chains into action, we often demand that God make the person whole and well. But sometimes God says, "No." In a way, it is easier for us to accept the fact that God failed to acknowledge our requests. After all, he's a busy God, with lots of prayer requests to consider; maybe he never got around to ours. But I cannot believe that. God hears every prayer. God sees what we could not see; God knows what we could not know, and he calls some people home. Would we wish that person back for one more day in this life? You bet we would! But somehow, as a family, we have to believe that God knows what is best. We may not agree, but we do believe. I am reminded of something once said by Martin Luther: "We must go to the one whom we think is our enemy, and we must trust him."

In the final analysis, this is not a sermon about me and my prayers; it's about you ... and yours. All of us who bear the name "Christian" stand before a loving God who wants the best for every one of his children. What we cannot now see, we one day will understand, but for now, trusting the one to whom we pray is the best that we can do. And that is my prayer for you today. Thanks be to God. Amen.

CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Sermons for Sundays after Pentecost (Last Third):The Final Exam, by Steven Molin