The following list must be carefully followed if you wish to be miserable:
Think about yourself.
Talk about yourself.
Use "I" as often as possible.
Mirror yourself continually in the opinion of others.
Listen greedily to what people say about you.
Expect to be appreciated.
Be suspicious.
Be jealous and envious.
Be sensitive to slights.
Never forgive a criticism.
Trust nobody but yourself.
Insist ...
352. How To Cope in a Crisis
Illustration
Brett Blair
Rules for crisis management:
Hope for the best, bur prepare for the worst
Look first, then act
When you do act, act aggressively
Seek help
Delegate
Don't get locked on a detail
No matter how bad things get, be truthful
When others lose their head don't lose yours
Most "troubles" will resolve themselves
Remember failure means progress
Look for the silver lining.
353. How to Run the Race
Luke 12:49-59
Illustration
Brett Blair
During WWII, a Jewish family named Rosenberg was confined to a concentration camp where prisoners could escape the gas ovens as long as they could work. A young boy in the family was partially disabled from birth and could not carry a full workload. The parents were separated during the day by their separate work responsibilities, so they would hasten in the evenings to check on the condition of e...
Coach Shug Jordan at Auburn University asked his former Linebacker Mike Kollin, who was then playing for the Miami Dolphins, if he would help his alma mater do some recruiting.
Mike said, "Sure, coach. What kind of player are you looking for?" The coach said, "Well Mike, you know there's that fellow, you knock him down, he just stays down?" Mike said, "We don't want him, do we, coach?"
"No, that...
355. How to Stay Humble in a Haughty World - Sermon Starter
Luke 14:1-14
Illustration
Brett Blair
Coach Shug Jordan at Auburn University asked his former Linebacker Mike Kollin, who was then playing for the Miami Dolphins, if he would help his alma mater do some recruiting.
Mike said, "Sure, coach. What kind of player are you looking for?" The coach said, "Well Mike, you know there's that fellow, you knock him down, he just stays down?" Mike said, "We don't want him, do we, coach?"
"No, that...
356. Human Knowledge
John 6:25-59
Illustration
Brett Blair
Listen to this statistic: Knowledge is exploding at such a rate more than 2000 pages a minute that even Einstein couldn't keep up. In fact, if you read 24 hours a day, from age 21 to 70, and retained all you read, you would be one and a half million years behind when you finished (Campus Life)
An amazing statistic. Now tell me when do you suppose this information was compiled? It will alarm you t...
357. Humble Acts of Service
Mark 8:31--9:1
Illustration
Brett Blair
During the dark days of World War II, England had a great deal of difficulty keeping men in the coal mines. It was a thankless kind of job, totally lacking in any glory. Most chose to join the various military services. They desired something that could give them more social acceptance and recognition. Something was needed to motivate these men in the work that they were doing so that they would r...
358. Humor: You Call This Living?
John 20:1-9
Illustration
Brett Blair
There is a story of two garment workers in New York City. One was a cutter and one was a stitcher. They were working side by side. They began to talk about vacations. One said he was looking forward to his vacation and the other said he was not going on a vacation this year. The question was asked, “Why?”
“I went to Africa last year. I went elephant hunting.”
“Did you get any elephants?”
“No, I...
It is difficult to find anyone who has a kind word to say about hypocrites. Nobody likes a hypocrite; no one wants to be around one; the last thing one would want to be called is a hypocrite. Hypocrites are, by definition, deceptive, two-faced and treacherous. If discovered, hypocritical politicians are defeated at the polls, hypocritical friends get dropped and hypocritical preachers lose the tru...
Exegetical Aim: The resurrected body of Jesus was neither spirit in form nor completely human in form but something of a different order and conveys what we shall be someday. Prop: Writing material: Either a small clipboard or a marker board for the whole congregation to see. Lesson: Good morning! (response) I have a question for you this morning. Who is afraid of ghosts? (response) Why are you af...
361. I Am Sayings
John 6:35 - - 15:1,5
Illustration
Brett Blair
There are seven "I Am" sayings in the gospel of John. I Am the true vine is the last of these sayings.
I am the bread of life - 6:35
I am the light of the world - 8:12 & 9:5
I am the gate for the sheep - 10:7,9
I am the good shepherd - 10:11,14
I am the resurrection and the life - 11:25
I am the way and the truth and the life - 14:6
I am the true vine - 15:1,5
There is a bit of Jewish humor that goes like this: An old man goes to a diner every day for lunch. He always orders the soup du jour. One day the manager asks him how he liked his meal. The old man replies, "It was good, but you could give a little more bread. Two slices of bread is not enough." So the next day the manager tells the waitress to give him four slices of bread. "How was your meal, s...
363. I Am the Bread of Life - Sermon Starter
John 6:25-59
Illustration
Brett Blair
Sometime this week you will make a trip to the grocery store to get a loaf of bread. It will be readily available on the shelf. There will be quite a variety to choose from. You will pay little attention to the price, not realizing that the packaging that the bread is wrapped in actually costs more than the wheat that is in the bread. All in all, you will think it a very uneventful trip, but you w...
364. I Am The One Who Jesus Loves
John 13:23
Illustration
Brett Blair
Author and speaker Brennan Manning came up with a slogan. The slogan is, "I am the one Jesus loves." It sounds a little arrogant doesn't it? But he is actually quoting Scripture. Jesus' closest friend on earth, the disciple named John, is identified in the Gospels as "the one Jesus loved." Manning said, "If John were to be asked, 'What is your primary identity in life?' he would not reply, 'I am a...
365. I Am the Path
Jn 6:56-69; Mk 12:35-40
Illustration
Brett Blair
Stanley Jones tells of a missionary who got lost in an African jungle, nothing around him but bush and a few cleared places. He found a native hut and asked the native if he could get him out. The native said he could.
"All right," said the missionary, "show me the way."
The native said, "Walk," so they walked and hacked their way through unmarked jungle for more than an hour.
The missionary go...
It is fascinating to me that in our Southern Protestant religious culture, such a strong emphases is placed upon literal interpretation. Interestingly, Jesus so often did not speak literally, but figuratively. He spoke in allegories and images. He painted word pictures. Instead of literally coming out and saying what he meant, he so often would tell a story and let people draw their own conclusion...
367. I Am the True Vine - Sermon Starter
John 15:1-17
Illustration
Brett Blair
It is fascinating to me that in our Protestant religious culture, such a strong emphases is placed upon literal interpretation. Interestingly, Jesus so often did not speak literally, but figuratively. He spoke in allegories and images. He painted word pictures. Instead of literally coming out and saying what he meant, he so often would tell a story and let people draw their own conclusion. Indeed,...
368. I Can Be A Good Business Man
Matthew 25:14-30
Illustration
Brett Blair
Henry P. Crowell contracted tuberculosis when a boy and couldn't go to school. After hearing a sermon by Dwight L. Moody, young Crowell prayed, "I can't be a preacher, but I can be a good businessman. God, if you will let me make money, I will use it in your service."
Under the doctor's advice Crowell worked outdoors for seven years and regained his health. He then bought the little run-down Quak...
Exegetical Aim: Things are not always as they seem.
Props: A large transparent bowl and an egg carton full of eggs (one of which is hard boiled).
Lesson: [Place the bowl in the middle of the children on the floor and hold the carton of eggs in your hands.] Good morning. (response) Does anyone know what day this is? (response) That's right; it is Easter. And what do we celebrate on Easter? A few ...
Exegetical Aim: God is not a passive agent in the salvation of his people. He acts toward us because of his love toward us.
Props: A notebook and something to write with.
Lesson: Good Morning. (response) I need you to help me this morning. Open the notepad and write at the top "My Parents." Speak the words slowly as you write them: My Parents. I have been looking for a new mom and dad and I've b...
Exegetical Aim: Thomas' transition from doubt to faith concerning the resurrection of Jesus.
Props: A talent that will come as a surprise to the children; e.g., being able to juggle. You must be able to perform the talent before the children. If you use the object it needs to be hidden until revealed. A unique object could be used rather than a talent.
Lesson: Good morning. (response) I have a t...
372. I Looked Into His Face
John 3:1-21
Illustration
Brett Blair
One of the best photographs from the WWII era is a photo of King George the VI inspecting a bombed out section of London. He stops to talk with a little boy, who is sloppily dressed and has his cap on crooked. The King is bending on one knee and looking directly into the face of the child, and even though it is a profile shot of the king you can see that his is a look of compassion. Tell me that t...
373. I Love Baskin' Robins
John 1:43-51
Illustration
Brett Blair
I have hunch that we have felt pretty good about letting people find their own way to God. You hear it said in families. We don't want to impose upon our children our religion, these parents say, we want them to find their own way. There is only one conclusion to this path, heartache and sorrow for the missed opportunities.
Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm really hungry," said the first on...
374. I Must Go Myself
Illustration
Brett Blair
The story is told of John Henry Newman, who, in the 1800's, was an Anglican minister in England. His religious pilgrimage ultimately took him to Rome and the Roman Catholic Church. He ultimately would become a cardinal in the Catholic Church and the most preeminent leader of that church in Europe. If you go into almost any Catholic church today you will find a Sunday school class called the Newman...
Exegetical Aim: Jesus is a healer.
Props: Either real or toy doctor's equipment. As many items as there are kids if possible. You might include a few band-aids if you have limited resources.
Lesson: Good morning! (response) How many of you have been to the doctor? (response) What does a doctor do? (response) What kind of equipment does a doctor use? (response) Does anyone know what this is calle...