Did they have any idea what they were getting themselves into? Peter, Andrew, James, and John had no crystal ball that day when Jesus called them. When the call came, they were going about business as usual: casting nets, pulling them back in, sorting and salting the fish, taking them to market, and maintaining their equipment. However it was that they became fishermen, they had not chosen an easy profession. Yes, I've seen the bumper sticker: "A Bad Day Fishing is Better than a Good Day at Work." These ...
Streams of living water ... That's what the Son of God offered the Samaritan woman at the well, and that's what he offers us as well — streams of living water — life-giving, life-renewing, life-refreshing water that can satisfy those who drink so that we will never thirst again. We are offered water that satisfies our longings in life, water that nourishes our innermost selves, and water that comes from an active, living trust in God and a passionate faith in Christ. We need this kind of water. We need ...
Sometimes you have to wonder. Sometimes all you can do is shake your head about the things people say and the things people think and the things they reveal to us about them. A friend of mine has multiple sclerosis (MS), a chronic disease that gradually weakens and paralyzes the body. She tells me the things people say to her, the advice she gets, and you wouldn't believe it. Here a short sampling: "You must really like being sick; you bring so much of it on yourself." That comment came to her from a close ...
When Sadie and Bessie, the famed "Delany Sisters," were in the early years of their second centuries (103 and 105, respectively) they told interviewers, "God only gave you one body, so you better be nice to it. Exercise, because if you don't, by the time you're our age, you'll be pushing up daisies." Fitness gymnasiums ought to put the Delany Sisters on their billboards and quote them into larger profit margins. Some people get into exercise in a very big way. When Teddy Roosevelt was president of the ...
(Note: At the time of reading this passage to the congregation, explain that a single talent was worth more than fifteen years' wages of a laborer [per NRSV footnote to Matthew 25:14] — in other words, easily a cool quarter of a million dollars in today's terms!) "I was afraid," quavered the third servant, "because I knew that you were a ruthless businessman, expecting profit even when it is impossible. I was so afraid of losing your money that I put it in a box and buried it. Here is your money, exactly ...
The other day I stumbled onto a Discovery Channel show about underwater archaeology (not basket weaving). The archaeologist described the process of identifying the probable location of an underwater wreck site, the grueling work involved in beginning the process, and the same kind of methodical work that characterizes all scientific archaeology. But then her eyes twinkled as she described the joy of uncovering the first artifact, or recognizing a significant discovery. And that of course is what it is all ...
"He started it." You've probably heard that from the backseat or from a distant bedroom. "He started it." If you have a daughter, the variation is, "She started it." Children become more sophisticated as they grow up, but the jostling and blaming continue. Blaming one another is a human trait; that's why it's recorded in the Bible's story of Adam. In Hebrew, the name, Adam, means "humanity" and the name, Eve, means "life." In Genesis, chapter 3, after Adam eats the fruit, he blames Eve and then goes on to ...
Dr. James Dobson tells about a friend of his, a specialist in obstetrics and gynecology. One day this friend telephoned another specialist in the same field and asked him for a favor. “My wife has been having some abdominal problems and she’s in particular discomfort this afternoon,” he said. “I don’t want to treat my own wife and wonder if you’d see her for me?” The other specialist invited the doctor to bring his wife in for an examination. When he did he discovered (are you ready for this?) that she was ...
There was a story on the Internet recently that proves rednecks aren’t confined to the southern part of the United States. According to this story a man in Australia was fined after police discovered that he had used a seat belt to buckle in a case of beer while his five-year-old son was consigned to playing in the car’s floor totally unprotected. Constable Wayne Burnett said he was “shocked and appalled” when he pulled over the car one Friday in the Australian town of Alice Springs. A 30-can beer case was ...
When your child is playing a musical instrument that is “rented” from the school, instead “owned” by you, there is a big decision to make at the end of the school year. Do you pay rental fees for the summer break? Or do you turn the instrument in? Paying rental fees for the summer means that the instrument will be practiced on hot summer days and during beautiful sunsets. Turning the instrument in means that summer is for swimming, sleep-away camps, family vacations, flexible schedules and peace and quiet ...
I think some people are natural-born gardeners. Our Lord grew up in a society that was familiar with agriculture. The images that he used to explain the ways of his Father in heaven are familiar to his audience. Growing up, my closest experience to agriculture was living in, "the Garden State." Most people, when they pass through New Jersey, are surprised to see that expression on the license plates of vehicles registered in New Jersey. Most folks traveling through New Jersey experience the megalopolis, ...
Theme: Jesus among you Characters: Sexton Monk 1 Monk 2 Rabbi Abbot Tone: Thoughtful Setting/Props: CD or tape of “Chant” by Benedictine monks Door Table Chairs Large Bible Monks habits (optional) Approximate time: 10-12 minutes Sexton: Good day. My name is Abelard. I am the sexton here at St. Dominic’s monastery. My job is to take care of things. What things, you ask? Why, things like tolling the tower bell, tending to the candlewicks in the chapel, and caring for the details of the cemetery like the ...
1663. 101 Ways to Spend Your Time
Illustration
Tim Kimmel
Becoming good at the things that build inner confidence and calm takes practice and a dash of creativity! The following list might provide some cloudseeding for a brainstorm or two of your own: Pay off your credit cards. Take off ten pounds or accept where you are without any more complaints. Eat dinner together as a family for seven days in a row. Take your wife on a dialogue date (no movie, guys). Read your kids a classic book (Twain's a good start). Memorize the Twenty-third Psalm as a family. Give each ...
1664. Seven Years of the Common Cold
Humor Illustration
The stages of the common cold in seven years of marriage or is it the seven stages of marriage in the common cold. First year: "Sugar, I'm worried about my little baby girl. You've got a bad sniffle. I want to put you in the hospital for a complete checkup. I know the food is lousy, but I've arranged for your meals to be sent up from Rossini's." Second year: "Listen, honey, I don't like the sound of that cough. I've called Dr. Miller and he's going to rush right over. Now will you go to bed like a good ...
Do you realize how much you pay to get “roughed up?” You heard me right. You even pay big bucks to get roughed up on a daily basis. To be sure, you don’t think about this activity as getting “roughed up.” You probably think of it as your morning shower or your evening bath. But consider what you do as you go about your daily cleansing rituals. Whether you use a washcloth, a loofah, or one of those “buff-puff” thingies, as you rub and scrub in the bathtub or shower you are roughing up and sloughing off dead ...
1666. That's How The Fight Started
Humor Illustration
The following is a long running series of jokes that can be put together or separated: 1. One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started..... 2. My wife and I were sitting at a table at her school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked ...
Anyone here like criticism? How do you respond to criticism? Does being criticized bring you down or fire you up? Do you want to hunker in your bunker or lob your own volley of vitriol back at your critics? Learning how to respond to criticism is a lifetime journey. That’s because critics will be accompanying you from cradle to grave! In every election year there is no shortage of negative, critical remarks flying around the airwaves. Of course all politicians virtuously claim they hate “negative” ads. And ...
From: Priscilla@galilee.net To: Mom&Dad@jerusalem.org Dear Mom and Dad, I just wanted to write and let you know that I'm doing just fine. I know you don't approve of me traveling from place to place with this fellow, Jesus, and his companions, but I need you to know that things are going amazingly well. Before you get to worrying more than you already are, none of the "boys" as you called them, are giving me any trouble at all. Not a single one of them has hit on me, if that's what you're worried about. ...
Then Jesus told them a parable about their need to pray always and not to lose heart. He said, "In a certain city there was a judge who neither feared God nor had respect for people. In that city there was a widow who kept coming to him and saying, ‘Grant me justice against my opponent.' For a while he refused; but later he said to himself, ‘Though I have no fear of God and no respect for anyone, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will grant her justice, so that she may not wear me out by ...
Then Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in him, "If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free." They answered him, "We are descendants of Abraham and have never been slaves to anyone. What do you mean by saying, ‘You will be made free'?" Jesus answered them, "Very truly, I tell you, everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin. The slave does not have a permanent place in the household; the son has a place there forever. So if the ...
Mr. Jones picked up the wrong umbrella in a hotel, and the umbrella's rightful owner called his attention to it. Embarrassed, Mr. Jones offered his apologies, picked up the right one, and went on his way. But the incident served to remind Mr. Jones that he had promised to buy umbrellas for his wife and daughter, so he went across the street to a store and purchased one for each of them. As he came out from the store and began to get in his car — three umbrellas on his arm now — the man whose umbrella Mr. ...
Easter is a time of surprises. There was a lady who, on the Saturday afternoon before, was doing some baking for her Easter dinner the next day. There was a knock at the door. She went to find a man, dressed in shabby clothes, and looking for some odd jobs. He asked her if there was anything he could do. She said, "Can you paint?" "Yes," he said. "I'm a rather good painter." "Well," she said, "there are two gallons of green paint there and a brush, and there's a porch out back that needs to be painted. ...
Scripture offers a wealth (if I may use that term) of material about greed, about the love of money or possessions, and the disastrous consequences that kind of love can have. Of course, there is Judas who, in his greed, became an accessory to murder; Ananias and Sapphira who lied about the sale price of their property so they could keep some of the money for themselves; the rich young ruler who wanted to follow Jesus but could not bring himself to get rid of his possessions first. First Timothy says, "The ...
There is an interesting story that comes out of the Second World War. England and Germany both had state-of-the-art fighter planes. Germany had the Messerschmitt, which was considered to be the world’s fastest fighter plane. The British had the Supermarine Spitfire. The Spitfire was slower than the Messerschmitt. Nevertheless, German pilots were envious of their British counterparts. You see, the Messerschmitt had been designed to hold the perfect German. Who was the perfect German? Who else but Der Fuhrer ...
When Moses descended from the heights of Mount Sinai, he juggled in his arms not two but three Tablets of the Covenant, with five commandments inscribed on each. At least that’s how Mel Brooks tells it in his classic comedy “History of the World, Part I.” ‘Hear me, o hear me! All pay heed!’ the movie Moses proclaims. ‘The Lord, the Lord Jehovah, has given unto you these fifteen . . . [One stone tablet drops and shatters. A perplexed Moses looks down and mutters ‘Oy!’] . . . ten, TEN commandments for all to ...