Mark 10:1-12 · Divorce
How Can We Restore the Christian Home?
Mark 10:1-12
Sermon
by Donald Macleod
Loading...

And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" He answered them, "What did Moses command you?" They said, "Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to put her away." But Jesus said to them, "For your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, 'God made them male and female.' 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.' So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder."

And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. And he said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another, commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery."

And they were bringing children to him, that he might touch them; and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it he was indignant, and said to them, "Let the children come to me, do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, Isay to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it." And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands upon them. Mark 10:2-16 (RSV)

And they were bringing children to him, that he might touch them; and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it he was indignant, and said to them, "Let the children come to me, do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of God ..." And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands upon them." (vv. 13, 14)

The Christian home, once the stable element in the structure of our Western society, is besieged today from without and within. Without is an age of bloated agendas, hurried and frantic claims upon our time and resources, to such a degree that the average American home has no identification except as a crossroads where its family members encounter each other on their way to somewhere else. Within is a rumpus room where there are no longer any shared interests and goals, no coming together of the aspirations of human hearts and wills, and where each family member is an isolated unit without communal support. Sad, isn't it? But glaringly true! And we have ample evidence to support the inevitable and disastrous results. (One or two up-to-date national or local domestic crises may be cited here as examples.)

Take a moment to reflect upon what in America we now have: one marriage in three ends in divorce or separation; the number of "latch-key" children, the offspring of single parents is alarmingly on the increase; the helterskelter of much contemporary home life leaves teenagers to follow the line of least resistance on their own; tragedies occur with such shocking impact that forces many parents to face each other wonderingly and ask, "What did we do wrong?"; our daily newspapers give us pause when we read (cite either facts or some statistics from one's local situation).

In view of all these negative and distressing facts, how very much beside the mark seems to be the question: "How can we restore the Christian home?" The prior question, however, is "Do we want to?" Not the strictly puritanical and patriarchal home of the New England of a century or so ago or the unbearable modern fiction of the Faiwells, Heimses, Hatches, and Swaggerts of our present time. It must be granted, however, that some such homes produced a great man or woman, although it is not clear or provable that their greatness may have emerged in spite of their environment. And there are other exceptions: someone was the product of a broken home and, by some grace, rose above it. Nevertheless, the facts of history, past and present, present us with a more or less preliminary question: what should we work towards, as far as the contemporary home is concerned? We have tried many remedies, but these have merely taught us that we cannot patch up a mess. Maybe the Gospel of the New Testament has something to tell us, if only we could take time to read and listen. Let us come to Jesus where we find him in Perea, a sort of scrubby bush country area of Palestine, and where the people, especially the women, spent their lives in a twilight of hope. They had little to which to look forward, yet they apparently had a deep concern for their children; and hearing of the presence of this "stranger of Galilee," they brought them to him - an action quite alien to their rustic and superstitious traditions about the caring for and handling of children. Note, however, the adverse reaction of the disciples at the intrusion of these women; note the verbs "rebuke" and "hinder." They might have said, "Clear these little monsters out of here!" But Jesus was "indignant" and he upset their prohibitions and said, "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of God ... And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands upon them." What a juxtaposition of human attitudes and sentiments, of the negative and positive, we have here: the disciples' "rebuke" versus Jesus' "indignant"; the disciples' "hinder them" versus Jesus' "let them come to me"; "whoever does not receive the kingdom as a little child" versus "he took them in his arms and blessed them."

What has this incident to tell us that might be helpful to the question before us? Can we restore or maintain the Christian home today? Yes, we can, but it can only be done if we take some essentials of our faith and put them to work in the critical situations of our times.

1. We must understand the real meaning of family responsibility. This brings us to the very essence of the sacrament of Baptism. Herein, however, lies one of the greater sins of omission of our church. Many parents are not informed of or taught what the baptismal ceremony means and entails. Some think of it as something similar to an injection; the baby must be "done," as if it were a sort of sacred vaccine. Others treat it like a social event, a family get-together in which champagne a la the launching of a ship takes precedence over the symbolism of the water. Or, some others treat it as an act of dedication in which what is done is entirely on and from the human side, and what God has done, does, and will do is not taken into any account. All these notions are spurious and they circumvent the responsibility factor at the heart of it all.

This brings us to the key word, "covenant," which defines for us the connotation of responsibility in the context of the Christian life. A Christian covenant involves not just two persons or parties, but three: father, mother, and God. With two persons only, it is just a pact like any secular agreement. But a covenant involves far more: it is a sworn agreement to which God is witness and in which God's concept of sincerity, justice, and faithfulness is the standard by which to live. What an awful sense of responsibility this implies for us! Note, for example, the verb in verse 13: these women were "bringing" their children. They didn't "send" them as many parents do with their children, either to Sunday school or to church. They came themselves, taking their children with them. In other words, they brought their home to the church. And our responsibility incorporates much of the same. With the whole family coming together to Christian worship, there is involved here a commitment and witness to the good life that re-forms the ideal family, Sunday after Sunday, as a unit within the kingdom of God's will and peace.

2. We must cultivate those basic spiritual factors necessary to creating sincere personal relationships. Dougles Goldring, the English novelist, in his book Nobody Knows, has one of the women say this:

"It's all wrong, Gilbert. I just hate this new-fangled nonsense about marriage being hell and women being slaves and all that. Of course it's hell and I'll tell you why. It's hell because of three things which are common to both sexes: selfishness, ill-temper, and bad manners. They're all curable; but the divorce court won't cure them; it never has and it never will. Love's a thing that grows slowly and has roots and can stand wind and weather."

Centuries ago, Tertullian wrote: "How beautiful, then, is the marriage of two Christians, two who are one in hope, one in desire, one in the way of life they follow, and one in the religion they practise."

Both of these opinions are true. Only a vital religion can provide the power needed to cultivate and sustain this love that cements human relationships in depth and through time. You see: all love is of God, and all hatred and enmity are of the evil one. Since himself is love, then true affection in the home is more likely to deepen and endure where his presence is acknowledged, honored, and made central. Where love is, God is. And the home where such a reality is cherished will be a fruitful soil for the growth of mutual love, honesty, and respect.

The Christian home, however, is not an end in itself. There is a creativity in Christian love. If it is genuine, there is a continuity that goes on and on. When our children go out into the world to make their own homes, what will they most remember? If they have seen goodness in their parents' home, they will not be likely to doubt or scorn it in their own. If they have experienced estrangement, aching hearts, and long silences dispelled by repentance and forgiveness, they will know that love can flow back in through the window out of which it had flown. They will know that when trust has been broken, it can always be claimed back. But most of all, they will testify that pride, egotism, and orneriness are a sacrifice which precludes the sacrifice of the home.

Jesus, through the power of his Spirit, is able to renew and restore the many good and great things which somehow we have lost. The disciples, by their staid opinions and resentments, symbolized an old and wornout world. Jesus made the world young again as he took the children into his arms and blessed them. He put new life into the idea of a kingdom. He can bring the same to every home where there are people who believe in him, love him, and take him in to live with them.

C.S.S. Publishing Company, Know The Way, Keep The Truth, Win The Life, by Donald Macleod