Ken had not realized there was a shoplifter in the supermarket. He had been standing in the checkout line, "blissfully unaware" of any suspicious activity going on nearby. That all changed dramatically as a security guard, "300 pounds of corpulent fury, came barreling like a cannonball out of the security surveillance room" and down the next aisle.

That human behemoth of a security guard swooped down on the culprit, grabbed him by the belt at the small of his back, and lifted him off the floor. With his prey in tow, he vanished beyond the pickled okra, back into the secret recesses of the doors marked "Employees Only."

What security force would not be delighted to have such a huge embodiment of dedicated loss control on its staff? Later as he was reliving that disturbing scene, Ken thoug…