A father is a thing that is forced to endure childbirth without an anesthetic.

A father is a thing that growls when it feels good and laughs very loud when it's scared half to death.

A father never feels entirely worthy of the worship in a child's eyes. He's never quite the hero his daughter thinks, never quite the man his son believes him to be and this worries him, sometimes. So he works too hard to try and smooth the rough plac…