What makes people weary is conflict. We are torn apart, split in two, we are challenged at our core in large and small ways all day long. We say wryly, "No good deed goes unpunished," running right into the conflict of getting weary in well doing.

Biologists tell us we have two choices in most situations: We can fight or take flight or tend and befriend. The fight and flight response is most often articulated in funny hand motions — where we both beckon the person close and push them away at the same time. The animal part of most humans knows exactly what this means. We are standing at a party with a beverage in our hand — we are smiling, but inside we are wishing we could run away. Human contact can be quite scary! Because it is also so wonderful, none of us, including the writer of the …