In the novel Barabbas there is a scene where a woman who lives with the outcasts in the valley of Ge-Hinnom, outside the gates of the city of Jerusalem, waits for sleep at night. She hears the groanings of the sick. She thinks about Jesus and the kingdom he is always talking about. She thinks the next day will bring an end to suffering.

Later on in the story, after the death of Jesus, many of his followers are persecuted. This woman is led out to the place where people are put to death. A yelling crowd surrounds her, and begins stoning her.

She stretches out her hands and says, "He has come! He has come! I see him!" Then, she falls to her knees and says, "Lord, how can I witness for thee? Forgive me ..." And, she dies.

There is a phrase in the Gospel of John which, in my mind, sums up t…