British naturalist Alfred Russell Wallace was without peer in the 19th century except for one name: Charles Darwin. One of Wallace's most astute observations about nature has gotten totally forgotten in the whole debate over the "survival of the fittest." Wallace made a surprising discovery about the saving nature of struggle.

One day Wallace was observing moths struggling to hatch out from their cocoons. One of the larger insects seemed to be having a particularly hard time getting out. After hours of watching this moth beat desperately with its yet undeveloped wings to break out of the cocoon, Wallace couldn't take it anymore. Moved by the creature's life-and-death struggle, Wallace decided to lend a helping hand. Gently, being careful not to injure the insect, Wallace used his sharp knife to cut open the remainder of the cocoon and freed the moth from that transformation chamber.

But something was wrong. The moth was not injured. It began beating its wings to pump them up. Its body unfolded and filled out. Yet in the ensuing days, compared to all the other moths that had struggled their way out of their cocoon captivity, Wallace's moth appeared smaller. Its movements were noticeably weaker. Even its wing and body color were less vivid, pale and dull. Over the course of its brief life span the "helped out" moth flew poorly, fed inefficiently, and finally died long before its time.

In this little experiment Wallace discovered that his compassion was actually cruelty. The struggle against the cocoon was nature's way of strengthening and developing the moth's wings so it could fly. The "easy-way-out," the struggle-free hatching, was a recipe for failure, not success. The struggle to break free from a cocoon was a necessary, life-enhancing, life sustaining part of a successful moth's existence. The struggle made the moths stronger, their shades of color more vivid, and increased their vitality.

Parents know this, but how hard is it for us to do this. One of the worst things we can do for our children is give them everything they want. Why? Because there will never be an end to "all we want." Give someone everything they want and they will simply want more.

One of the other worst things we can do for our children is to do everything for them. If you find yourself cutting your teenage son's meat for him, you know somewhere along the way you went too far, "helped out" too much. Doing everything for another, even out of love and compassion, insures the other will have a gray and dreamless life. Like the over-aided moth, they will have no strength, no vibrancy, no soaring spirit in their living.

In today's gospel text Jesus shows his great love for his disciples by sending them off, by themselves, without his help, to struggle alone.