Great signs on businesses and organizations. First the businesses:

• Sign in the window of a New York City shop: Errant girl wanted.
• This sign is from a fun-loving travel agency: Go away, please.
• Bargain on a restaurant coupon: Buy one hot dog for the price of two and receive a second hot dog absolutely free.
• In a gift shop: Meek, timid salesperson on duty. Come in and browse around.
• Over a wig shop: Never Say Dye.
• In an optometrist's office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
• In a bank window: Up a tree? Try our branch.
• In a clothing store: Our prices are trivial per suit.
• On a second hand store: These books were owned by a little old lady who never read faster than 50 words a minute.
• In a bakery window: Shortcake take it home and berry it.
• In a radiator repair shop's advertisement: Take Us To Your Leaker.
• On a car in Kansas City, Mo.: Pass with care driver chews tobacco.
• In a Memphis maternity shop: We carry everything but the baby.
• On an optometrist's window: We're the best in sight.
• On the funeral home: Drive carefully we can wait!
• On a shoe repair shop: We bring back departed soles.
• On a motel: Our King Size Beds are a lot of bunk.
• At reducing salon: Let us help you win the losing game!
• On a long established dry cleaning store: Thirty-eight years on the same spot.
• On a plumber's truck: A straight flush beats a full house." also: 
• Another plumber: Don't sleep with a drip tonight. Call a plumber.
• Also a Plumber: If it wasn't for your plumber, you'd have no place to go.
• Plumber Again: We repair what your husband fixed.
• Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one Weak."
• Tire shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."

Here are a few from organizations:

• On front of a church: "We have a long praying record."
• On the wall of a Baltimore estate: "Trespassers will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law - Sisters of Mercy."
• On a school bulletin board: "Free! Wisdom on Mondays through Fridays. Bring your own container."
• In a dance hall: "Good clean dancing every night but Sunday."
• Sign on a university bulletin board: "Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria." Attached to the same sign: "Socks can eat wherever they want to."
• A sign in the library: "Last of the big lenders."