I want to make my annual public service announcement to the men in our congregation. Guys, it’s time to do your Christmas shopping. I hope our men have this task already out of the way. But just in case, please heed my announcement.

I understand that a [certain couple in our church] slipped off to [a nearby city] to do their Christmas shopping and somehow they got separated for several hours. Fortunately they had their cell phones with them.

“Honey, where are you!?” [the woman] asked.

“Darling,” [he] says, “do you remember when we were first married the jewelry shop where you saw that diamond necklace you loved? But we didn’t have enough money at the time, so I said, ‘Someday I’ll come back to this shop and buy that necklace for you.’ Do you remember?”

“Yes!” she shouts, excitedly.

“W…