Zack had seen the movie. You know, the one with Jim Carrey and Jennifer Aniston — Bruce Almighty. Zack thought it was a pretty cheesy movie ... so predictable ... God helps the guy get the girl. But Zack was thinking, who wants a girl who wants commitment and kids? And who really wants a job? Zack didn't want a job; all he wanted was money. Even oil company executives probably had to do something to make money other than raising prices every time some Middle Eastern king had a toothache. Zack didn't want to do anything. All Zack wanted was money and lots of it — and babes.

Still, Zack had to figure out how to get God to give him the kind of power God gave Bruce in the movie. Unlike Bruce, Zack didn't have a bone to pick with God about how unjustly the world was run. Zack didn't really giv…