I Want You All to Get A’s
Matthew 20:1-16
Illustration
by Will Willimon

The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard that cries out against our sense of judgment. We cannot help but puzzle and protest over the actions of the landowner. We cannot avoid the conclusion that this story is just not fair.

​William Willimon gives the story a modern twist: First day of class the professor says, "Now class, this is a course in advanced mathematics. Your entire grade will be based upon your solution of a very difficult mathematical problem. And I want you all to do well. I want everyone to get an A. So I am going to go ahead and give you the problem. I urge you to begin work on it right away, because it is a real challenge."

You do not want to happen again what happened last semester. So you set aside some time every day to do work on the problem.  But you are somewhat surprised when Jane, one of the girls in the class, comes up to you at a party a few weeks later and asks, "Didn't that math professor give us something to work on during the first class?"

You can hardly believe your ears. Is she in for a big surprise! She hasn't even begun to work on the problem!

"Could I come by some time and get the problem?" Jane asks.

But she never does and you are even more surprised when three weeks before the end of the semester, John bumps into you again, in the cafeteria and says, "Somebody said we were supposed to do something for that math class. I don't seem to have the problem. Could I get it from you? I plan to get started on it soon as I can."

There's no way she'll get it finished! Tough luck for her. You can't be responsible for these irresponsible types. Last day of the class. You have been working most of the night before but you have finished the problem. You purchase one of those blue, see through folders to contain your work. Professors love those. You are at the head of the line to proudly hand in your folder. The professor quickly glances at your work, "Good," she says, "good, looks fine. I think you have just earned yourself an A."

You are a bit surprised to see Jane in line behind you. She also has her work to hand in, though it is in a red folder. The professor takes her work, glances over it as well. "Good work Jane. See? You are good in math. Looks like you got an A."

How did she do it? You are about to find out. Jane says to the professor, "Well, you know I couldn't have done it without you. Thanks for all those afternoons that you spent with me. I've never had a professor who has been willing to spend four afternoons a week, coaching a student for hours. Thanks. You are a great teacher!"

What?

Then there's John. His work isn't in a folder. But there is a stack of papers in his greasy little hands. He thrusts it toward the professor. She looks at his papers and says, "John, excellent. You got the problem right, from what I can see. I'm sure you'll get an A."

"Well, er, thanks professor. And I want to apologize for what my roommate said when you knocked on our door last night. See, we've never had a professor in the dorm before. What time did you get home last night? It had to be about dawn. Thanks for all your help on the work."

There are murmurings of injustice in your heart. What is this? Is this any way to run a math class? You are incensed.

"What's the problem?" asks the professor. "Didn't I make clear, at the beginning of this class, that I wanted all of you to make an A. You got an A, the others also got an A. What's the problem?"

You look at your A. But somehow it doesn't feel like an A now that everyone has one, what with this professor and her midnight forays into the dorms and her spoon feeding everyone else. "Look at it this way," she says to you, "I'm a teacher. I teach. I want everyone to learn. They needed a bit of an extra nudge, you didn't. Why do you begrudge my generosity?

ChristianGlobe Networks, Inc., Defining Justice with Jesus, September 19, 1999, by Will Willimon