It is never a pleasant prospect to deal with someone who has a complaint with you. As a new pastor, and a very young one at that, one of the things I struggled with most was the experience of con­flict with members. I remember as if it were yesterday a signifi­cant misunderstanding that developed between the congregation's "matriarch" and me very early in my time there. I prayed about the difficulty we were having, and I knew that I needed to go to her home and ask for the opportunity to talk things out. I will never forget the look on her face as she opened the door and saw me standing there (shuddering inside, I may add). She looked at me and said, "I didn't think you had it in you to come here and meet with me about this face-to-face." Then, after a long pause, and the slightest nod of …