Can anyone doubt the troubled state of marriage? Across the nation, we average one divorce decree for every two marriage licenses. In some parts of the country, as many divorce as marry each year. In spite of this high divorce rate, people do not give up marrying. In fact, a higher percentage of people marry today than a century ago.

It seems this problem can, at least in part, be traced to the high demands we make on marriage. Particularly, we have tremendously high emotional expectations. Our ancestors appreciated an emotionally satisfying relationship, but not as the first priority. They had more fundamental expectations. At the dawn of history, people married primarily for safety, not romance. In a hunting and gathering culture, the family was society's unit for physical survival.

As our…