Do you ever find yourself reminiscing about someone you love who has died? Maybe at family gatherings or when your friends get together the conversation eventually turns toward someone you loved. And you start sharing stories about this person. Stories about their quirks and silly side. Stories about their habits or hobbies or advice they shared. And with every story, a little more of that person’s character is revealed.
I read an interesting article from an Irish journalist who interviewed folks on the stories behind their tattoos. Kim and Tarah Harte are sisters who both have spoons tattooed on their left upper arms. Their father died of cancer during the pandemic when their visits to him were strictly limited. The day he died, the sisters arrived at the hospital and found their father lying in his bed. He looked so peaceful. Evidently, he’d just finished eating some yogurt--one of the few things he could manage at that time--and he was cradling a spoon in his hand. The sisters said that in spite of their sorrow, when they saw that spoon, they started laughing.
Because of the pandemic, the Harte sisters couldn’t have a full funeral to honor their father. They couldn’t sit around at the local pub with family and friends to tell stories about him. So they got matching spoon tattoos on their left arms as a way to honor him. And whenever someone asks them about their unusual tattoos, they get the opportunity to tell about their beloved dad. As Kim Harte says, “Every time that I see it, it makes me smile and it’s weirdly comforting . . . you’re kind of carrying him with you.”
Kerri Ní Dochartaigh (pronounced DO-har-tig), author of the memoir Thin Places, shares that her tattoo of a canary is in honor of her grandfather and his impact on her life. Kerri’s grandfather rehomed canaries and pigeons. As a child, Kerri collected dandelion heads to feed the canaries. She and her grandfather had a special bond.
Years later as an adult, Kerri had developed a drinking problem, and she really wanted to get sober. She finally made up her mind that on a specific date, she would quit drinking for good. She decided to commemorate that decision with a tattoo. She wasn’t sure what she was going to get until she sat down in the tattooist’s chair. And she began telling the tattoo artist about her decision to give up drinking, and about her grandfather who had guided her through a tough childhood. She was giving up drinking because she knew it’s what he wanted for her. That day was the start of Kerri’s sober life.
Now every time she looks at the tattoo of the canary on her arm, she remembers her grandfather’s love and how it led her to sobriety and a better life. In the three years since she got her tattoo, she’s faced some really hard times. As she says, “. . . there have been times, honestly, where I would have just drunk everything in the house if I didn’t have that tattoo … It sounds ridiculous, but it holds me to account.” (1)
When I read our Bible passage for Maundy Thursday, I think about the stories Jesus’ friends told about him after his death, resurrection and ascension to heaven. Throughout much of Jesus’ ministry his closest friends, his disciples, didn’t understand what he was doing. They didn’t get the true meaning of his teachings. In our Bible passage today, Jesus even says, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” It was only after his death, resurrection and return to the Father that they could look back and make sense of his life.
And I imagine his disciples telling this story to one another, the story of Jesus washing their feet. Did their faces shine when they told it? Did tears roll down their cheeks? One thing is for certain: when they looked back at this moment, they finally understood how much God loved them. How much God would sacrifice to restore them. And they understood that their mission for the rest of their lives was to spread that same sacrificial love to others.
Our Bible passage begins, “It was just before the Passover Festival. Jesus knew that the hour had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end.”
In 2018 Bono, the lead singer of U2, suffered a severe health crisis. It affected many facets of his life, including his songwriting. In an interview with Rolling Stone magazine, Bono talked about the album he wrote after his health scare. It opens with a song titled “Love Is All We Have Left.” Bono says, “I thought it would be interesting to write a song from the point of view of a person who maybe wouldn’t sing another song. One of the things I ask myself on this album is, ‘If you have one thing to say, what is it? If this is all we are left with, I am content with it – love.’” (2)
This was the last night of Jesus’ life. He had one thing left to say. “If this is all we are left with, I am content with it---love.”
Our Bible passage continues: “The evening meal was in progress, and the devil had already prompted Judas, the son of Simon Iscariot, to betray Jesus. Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.”
Think about that statement for a moment: “Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power . . .” That means Jesus had the power to reveal himself in all his divine glory and authority. He had the power to answer all his disciples’ questions and erase all their doubts and fears. He had the power to stop Judas from betraying him. He had the power to stop the Roman soldiers from arresting him. He had the power to stop the trial and the humiliation and the beatings and the torture of nails being pounded into his hands and feet. He had the power to save his life. He knew that the Father had put all things under his power. And what did he choose to do with that power?
Pastor Steve Bezner of Houston Northwest Church posted the following thought on Twitter: “Sometimes I joke about what I’d do if I had one day left to live. Eat junk, go crazy, etc. Today it hit me: Jesus knew. And he washed feet.” (3)
Why, in his last night on earth, would Jesus use his awesome, divine power to wash his disciples’ feet? Because Jesus knew that the greatest power in all of Creation is sacrificial love. Isn’t that why God created us and breathed His life into us? Isn’t that why John 3:16-17 expresses the very heart and purposes of God? “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.”
This is how God redeems the world from the power of death. This is how He establishes His kingdom of justice and peace and eternal life. Not through force, not through miracles, not through displays of overwhelming power. Through the simple act of sacrificial love.
Our story continues in verses 12-17: “When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place.
“Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked them. “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.”
You see, Jesus didn’t want this moment to just be a touching memory for the disciples, or for us. No, this is a defining moment, a life-changing commandment from God, which he summed up in verses 34-35 of this passage: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
If you are a follower of Jesus, the command to love is now your calling. “As I have loved you, so must you love one another. By this (emphasis mine) everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
In 2012 a Canadian woman named Dina Salivan was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. She underwent medical treatment, but the cancer spread to other parts of her body and brain. In 2017, doctors told Dina that she had just six months to live.
Dina had set aside money to bequeath to her friends and to charity after her death. But when she got her six-month sentence from her doctors, she decided she wanted to give generously while she was still able to see the results. So she split up $50,000 among 70 of her friends, with the stipulation that they give the money away to charity. One friend used the money to help a refugee family in Calgary. Another friend in Africa used the money to fund an art project for children in her town. A friend named Joni Bouchard shared that her son had died when he was 12 years old. She used the money from Dina’s bequest to buy pajamas for mothers who have lost their children through a charity called Pajama Project.
As friends shared the stories of how they were using the money to help those in need, other friends and even strangers asked if they could help too. Soon, people who had never even met Dina Salivan were contributing toward her friends’ charitable projects. Dina’s selfless act spread far beyond her group of 70 friends. As Joni Bouchard said, “Dina is teaching us how to live.” (4, 5)
In this moment when Jesus was facing his own death, he was teaching us how to live. He had all the power in the universe to stop what was happening to him. He had all the power to make his disciples bow down in worship at his feet. Instead, he knelt and washed their feet. He used his power to show them the sacrificial love of God. And he left them with a new command to show them how to live the rest of their lives: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."
1.“The story of my tattoo: ‘It sounds ridiculous, but it holds me to account’” by Patrick Freyne, Irish Times, November 14, 2021. https://www.irishtimes.com/life-and style/the-story-of-my-tattoo-it-sounds-ridiculous-but-it-holds-me-to-account-1.4722703?utm_campaign=mb&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_source=morning_brew.
2. “Bono: The Rolling Stone Interview” By Jann S. Wenner, Rolling Stone, https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-features/bono-the-rolling-stone-interview-3-203774/.
3. Steve Bezner @Bezner Twitter, November 17, 2014.
4’ “Calgary woman turns terminal cancer diagnosis into a way to touch lives across the world,” by Heide Pearson, Global News, April 14, 2017 © 2017 Global News, a division of Corus Entertainment Inc., https://globalnews.ca/news/3380388/calgary-woman-turns-terminal-cancer-diagnosis-into-a-way-to-touch-lives-across-the-world/.
5. Also “Fortney: Friends, family 'pay it forward' to inspiring Calgarian with terminal illness” by Valerie Fortney, Calgary Herald, April 30, 2017. https://calgaryherald.com/news/local-news/fortney-friends-family-pay-it-forward-to-inspiring-calgarian-with-terminal-illness.