A young pastor was telling his congregation how bad women are. He stated that a lot of the trouble in the world was due to women. He went on and on about women and the problems they cause. After the message the pastor was greeting the people as they left church. An older husky woman came up to the pastor and, as she was shaking his hand, she squeezed it quite unmercifully. He cried out, "That hurts." She asked him, "What was the telephone number of the Garden of Eden?" He said, "I don't know." She ...
A man was going up to bed, when his wife told him he'd left the light on in the garden shed. She could see it from the bedroom window. But he said that he hadn't been in the shed that day. He looked out himself, and there were people in the shed, stealing things. He rang the police, but they told him that no one was in his area, so no one was available to catch the thieves. He said "ok," hung up, counted to 30 and rang the police again. "Hello. I just rang you a few seconds ago, because there were people ...
A few years ago, Rabbi Wayne Dosick was at the airport when he witnessed an unusual scene. A police officer approached a mother and her small daughter. Someone had filed a missing-persons report on a little girl of the same age and appearance as the little girl in the airport. The officer was asking the mother to prove that the child was actually hers. First, the officer tried questioning the toddler, a technique that proved to be futile. He asked the name of her father. She replied, "Daddy." He asked ...
Have you ever noticed that men like to make jokes about marriage? For example, there's a story about a man sitting at the bar in his local tavern, furiously imbibing shots of whiskey. One of his friends happens to come into the bar and sees him. "Lou," says the shocked friend, "what are you doing? I've known you for over fifteen years, and I've never seen you take a drink before. What's going on?" Without even taking his eyes off his newly filled shot glass, the man replies, "My wife just ran off with my ...
Today I want to talk with you about one of the hardest subjects in all the world to talk about as a pastor. In fact, experts in church growth tell pastors and church leaders to steer away from this topic because even church people don''t want to hear about it. If you don''t want to lose your congregation, they tell us, don''t talk about this particular topic. But we are duty-bound, we are under commission to talk about this subject because the Lord talked about it so very much in his life and his ministry. ...
Eleven people, so goes the story, were dangling from a rope beneath a helicopter in a rescue scenario. Being rescued were ten men and one woman. Word came down from the pilot that one of the eleven would have to let go; if not, everyone would perish. The woman spoke right up and said her whole life had been one of sacrifice -- for her children, husband, and parents -- and now she would be willing to sacrifice one last time by letting go. With that, the ten men applauded! The story's point? Never ...
Good Friday is not an easy day on which to preach, nor is what happened on Good Friday easy to explain. Many thoughtful Christians have a difficult time understanding how this very bad day in the life of Christ has become for Christians a good day. What's more, many find it perplexing to say that Jesus died for their sins because he died some 2,000 years before they were born. Then perhaps most perplexing of all are those theories of atonement that come to us in the New Testament, theories steeped in a ...
A Burden and An Ache is the title of a beautiful, heart-stirring book written by Clarence McConkey. It’s a series of word portraits of persons in the inner city, living around the church McConkey served as pastor, persons whose lives are down-beaten and ravaged even as the buildings around them. People who are as torn apart as the shattered economic and social structures that have sustained them. One of those persons is Ruby. Let me introduce you to her in the first person as McConkey did: “Ruby is a child ...
Four women were playing bridge together in the Recreation Room of a certain retirement center out in California. As they were playing -- but chatting, more than they were paying attention to their game, they noticed an elderly gentlemen wander into the room. They had never seen him before. He was obviously a newcomer to the Retirement Center. Quickly, the four ladies perked up. One of them said, "Well, hello there. You're new here, aren't you?" The old man smiled and said that he was. "Just moved in this ...
When I first came to Memphis, I visited downtown -- Mid-America Mall. I wanted to see the sculpture commemorating Martin Luther King -- the sculpture entitled "I've been to the Mountain." I must confess that I've never felt too good about that piece of art. It doesn't excite me. Maybe that's my dullness. Maybe my imaginative and visual senses are not cultivated enough. But Martin Luther King's speech is unforgettable. As was the rule for King, he took images from Scripture. "I've been to the Mountain", he ...
There is an old story about a man who went to a doctor for a physical examination. The examination was concluded, and the doctor said, "Sit down. I have good news for you. You are in perfect health. In fact, you have the health of a man half your age." The man thanked the doctor, got up and headed for the door. When he got near the door, he collapsed, and died on the spot. The doctor said to the nurse, "Let's turn him around so it looks like he was coming in." Dr. Karl Wenninger used to ask his medical ...
The Christian faith is supposed to make a difference in our lives. If it doesn't, why should we bother with it? If the Christian faith is supposed to make a difference in our lives, then we should expect that Christians will be different. And, Christians are supposed to make a difference in the world. We know these things - and yet, we tend to want to minimize the difference. We want to be like everyone else - not to offend anyone - to make our faith more attractive to others. But it is the difference that ...
In a large stone cathedral in Europe there was a grand, magnificent pipe organ. On a particular Saturday afternoon, the sexton was making one final check of the choir and organ loft high in the balcony at the back of the church. As he was making his inspection, he was startled to hear footsteps echoing up the stone stairway behind him. He thought the doors were all locked and that no one else was in the church. He turned to see a man in slightly tattered traveling clothes coming toward him. "Excuse me, sir ...
It's every parent's nightmare. You walk into the room only to see your toddler happily playing with open bottles of pills. The contents of several bottles spilled across the floor. This was the sight we took in one suspiciously quiet morning when our daughter was about eighteen months old. Somehow she had created a climbing wall for herself that had enabled her to reach a high-shelf basket containing a cornucopia of "cure-it-yourself" vitamin pills. Also nestled somewhere in the bottom of the basket was ...
Our eight-year-old daughter recently attended a wedding with her best friend, accompanied by her parents and two-year-old brother. As soon as the ceremony began, with typical eight-year-old audacity, the girls immediately slunk sideways away from their seats to get a better aisle view. They had heard that you had to french kiss when you got married and whatever that meant, they didn't want to miss a moment of it! But the ceremony ran long. The bride and groom kept talking instead of kissing, and the girls ...
Matthew 10:1-42, Matthew 9:35-38, Romans 5:1-11, Psalm 116:1-19, Genesis 18:1-15
Sermon Aid
Marion L. Soards, Thomas B. Dozeman, Kendall McCabe
OLD TESTAMENT TEXTS The Old Testament texts for this Sunday explore the question of whether anything is too difficult for God. This question is central to the story of Sarah's miraculous birth in Genesis 18:1-15; 21:1-7, while Psalm 116:1-2, 12-19 is a song of thanksgiving, which celebrates the fact that indeed nothing is beyond God's reach. Genesis 18:1-15 (21:1-7) - "Is Anything Too Difficult for God?" Setting. The Old Testament lesson for this Sunday is a familiar miracle story about the birth of Isaac ...
Each one of us gathered here today comes bearing the echoes of great people in our lives. Each one of us bears the mark of someone who touched us in a powerful way. It might be a mother or father, a grandparent, or an aunt or uncle. It could be a neighbor who took you under his or her wing, or a teacher, or even, dare I say, a pastor. If you're really blessed, you might even receive more than one such fellow traveler. The blessings of such people walking with us on our journey cannot be underestimated. ...
When all about us is change, there are still some things that remain the same. In Indiana, a frustrated taxpayer recently noticed the following sign on a bureaucrat's desk in the county office building: "We Don't Make Change." We sure don't. We resist change or making changes, and the more set our routines of life become, the more we don't make change. I am finding in my own life, as I get older, that it is easier to get in the habit of defending positions rather than making discoveries. Sigmund Freud ...
One day, a Sunday school teacher asked her class of children about their favorite Bible verses. One boy volunteered that his favorite was John 11:35, "Jesus wept," because it was short and easy to remember. A girl said her favorite was John 3:16, because she'd been told it was a summary of the gospel message and had memorized it for Bible school the previous summer. One boy said he liked the story of David and Goliath, especially the part about David killing Goliath with a stone from his slingshot. Next ...
Most days, the news carries stories that, in some way or other, involve the abuse of power. In recent years it has included financial abuses committed by top executives of major companies and abuse of Iraq detainees by U.S. prison guards, but there's almost always some sort of power abuse in the news. So here's a question for each of you: Do you think of yourself as a powerful person? Before you answer, let me be clear that I am not necessarily talking about having power on the scale of corporate CEOs or ...
I heard a story about a man who decided that he wanted to live a good life. He set his mind to developing healthy habits. He read every book he could find that laid out the path to a long and productive life. He never smoked, drank, or overindulged at the table. He ate fresh fruit and vegetables and stayed away from anything with preservatives in it. He exercised every day and got his eight hours of sleep each night. He lived in the country and avoided going into the city with its smog and high incidence ...
I know a man who has a severe back injury and lives with constant pain. He has seen the best doctors he can find. He has gone to a major medical center. He has taken thousands of dollars worth of treatments, but he has found no relief. He has also visited a chiropractor. He has tried acupuncture. The last I knew, he was planning to go to a faith healer. I can't blame him. It must be awful to suffer constantly — and to have little hope of healing. There are millions like him, people who have an ailment or ...
An eight year old boy came running home from school one day all excited because he'd won a stuffed animal won at the class Valentine's party. "Congratulations. How did you do that?" Mom asked. "Well," he explained, "the teacher put all our names together in a box, and then picked one out. I feel kinda bad though. I cheated." he said. You cheated?" Mom said. "How did you cheat?" With a guilty look on his face he said, "I prayed!" (1) I like that little boy's faith. According to the passage we're going to ...
Wasn't the rain last week great? It did so much to refresh the parched ground. It was great but I've got to tell you that it almost caused me to be in an accident. You see, the rain made me lose my focus. You know how it is when you're driving and the first drops hit your windshield. It's not enough to really turn on the wipers but just enough to make it hard to see. And you know if you turn on the wipers all you're going to do is smear all the dirt around. Well, I waited for a little bit for the rain to ...
Not everybody who takes up a life of crime is all that smart. Sometimes movies or television glorify criminals. They make them appear sophisticated, even cool. Most criminals do not fall in that category. Like the guy who walked into a little corner store in England with a shotgun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the ...