An old story. A classic car lover was perusing the classifieds and saw an ad that seemed impossible to believe. A 1966 candy-apple red Corvette, a dream car, and offered for $100. What? $100...for a classic? No way, José. Was it a wreck? Or maybe the price was a misprint. Still, he had to find out, so he called. A woman answered the phone and assured him that the car was in excellent shape and that there was no mistake about the price. He dashed over. To his delight the car proved to be everything the ...
I like the story about the two mountain boys who spotted a bobcat up a tree and decided to have some fun. One said, "I''ll shinny up that tree and chase him down, and you put him in a cage." The other agreed, and the first fellow climbed up the tree. When he reached the right limb, he started shaking, and the cat came tumbling down. The other fellow grabbed the varmint by the back of the neck and tried to put him into a cage. There was a terrible commotion. Dust and fur and skin were flying in all ...
Arnold Palmer once played a series of exhibition matches in Saudi Arabia. The king was so impressed that he proposed, in good Middle Eastern fashion, to honor his guest with a gift. Palmer resisted, "It really isn't necessary, Your Highness. I'm honored to have been invited." And, in good Middle Eastern fashion, his highness persisted, "I would be deeply upset," replied the king, "if you would not allow me to give you a gift." Palmer thought for a moment, "All right. How about a golf club? That would be a ...
"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.” (John 15.9-11) Healthy, growing, and branching out. That is what roses are supposed to be doing, but mine, the ones that Mr. Ted Jones [1] planted for me as a gift, were not doing that. Ted asked me a series of diagnostic ...
There have been many interpretations over the years about what happens in the sacrament of Holy Communion. For instance, back in the Middle Ages, many pious Christians saw what happened here as a kind of magic. The faithful were sitting out in the nave, where you are sitting, and up here, what was called the "east wall" in gothic architecture, the priest faced the altar, his back to the people, reading the service in Latin, a language the people couldn't understand. They knew, though, that a miracle was ...
In William Shakespeare's play, A Midsummer Night's Dream, the actors roam the stage looking for a scarce potion that can make humans fall in love. What with our church splits, divorce rate, homicides, racism, and terrorist wars, such an elixir, such a love potion, could come in handy in our own day. Jesus Christ told us in the Great Commandment to love our neighbor (Mark 12:28 ff). Then he stuck around to show us how it's done. What we have in the Gospels is not just words of love, but the deeds themselves ...
Every sport seems to come with occupational hazards. Take baseball. Baseball pitchers tend to end up with gimpy, arthritic elbows. Take football. Football players can end up with rickety, rocky knees. Take ballet. Ballet dancers almost always end up with the most gnarled, nobbed, ugly stumpy feet you can imagine. In fact, once you've seen a dancer's unslippered foot, you can never watch the grace and beauty, the fluid movement across the floor and into the air, in the same way. How can they move so ...
A great preacher in our Convention once told the story of skiing in Colorado, and he noticed on the slopes some people wearing red vests. Wondering who they were, he went closer and read these words on them: BLIND SKIER. He was astounded. If you've ever been skiing or just watched other people ski, you know how hard it must be to ski with two good eyes, much less with no eyesight at all. He wondered to himself, "How do they do it?" He went to a ski instructor and asked him how a blind person could ski? The ...
I had graduated from college and thought that I wanted to go to seminary, but I began to have doubts about whether or not that really was what I should do. Even if it was what I wanted to do, I had been going to school non-stop for sixteen years and I was burned out. Quite frankly, I was at a crossroads in my life where I didn't know what to do. Should I go on to seminary or not? Was I really called into the ministry or not? If I didn't go to the seminary, in the meantime, what was I going to do? For the ...
A great preacher in our Convention once told the story of skiing in Colorado, and he noticed on the slopes some people wearing red vests. Wondering whom they were, he went closer and read these words on the vest: BLIND SKIER. He was astounded. If you've ever been skiing or just watched other people ski, you know how hard it must be to ski with two good eyes, much less with no eyesight at all. He wondered to himself, "How do they do it?" He went to a ski instructor and asked him how a blind person could ski ...
A little girl walked into a pet shop. She went up to the shopkeeper and asked in a sweet little lisp, “Excuthe me, mithter, do you have any wittle wabbits?” The shopkeeper bent way down and put his hands on his knees so he would be on her level, and asked, “Do you want a wittle white wabbit or a wittle bwack wabbit? Or maybe that cute wittle bwown wabbit over there?” The little girl thought for a moment, put her hands on her knees, leaned forward and said in a quiet little voice, “Mr., I don’t fink my ...
Some of you may be familiar with the Darwin Awards. People are nominated for the Darwin Awards when they do something really stupid that costs them their lives. The reason that they are called the Darwin Awards is that by offing themselves in such an absurd way, it is suggested that these misguided folks have inadvertently improved the gene pool for rest of humanity. It’s a cynical view of life, but it has led to a collection of stories that are both true and bizarre. For example, there is the story of a ...
Sometime back Dr. Phil Berry took a picture outside a roadside convenience store. The store was on the Texas border on the highway leading to Colorado. It was one of those portable advertising signs with flashing lights along the top meant to lure in passersby. At the top of the sign it read, “Last chance Lotto Texas, clean restrooms, snacks.” Then, at the bottom of the sign, almost like an afterthought, it read, “Jesus is Lord.” “It’s like, on the way out of Texas, whatever you need, they have it,” says ...
The season of Advent is a “waiting game.” Everyone is “waiting” for something. *Students anxiously wait for finals to be over and the start of Christmas break. *Some employees have the big wait, as they hold their breath and learn whether or not there will be a Christmas bonus. *Retailers count the days til they can count the bottom line from the season’s buying frenzy. *Kids of all ages can’t wait to open up the brightly wrapped presents starting to appear under the tree. Everyone is waiting . . . for the ...
There is an old story about a mother of eight who walked into her house after visiting with a neighbor and found her five youngest children huddled together in the middle of the living room. On closer examination, she discovered that her children were gathered around a family of skunks. Utterly shocked, she screamed, “Run, children, run!” Responding to their mother’s command, each child grabbed a skunk and ran.[1] This story is a poignant parable of our sinful nature. Like giddy children huddled together ...
All of the plans and preparation had been completed and they were all gathering together in the room. As they entered, they each paused to look at the long, horseshoe-shaped table with the cushions spread out around the outside, and could not help but show a brief smile. Even with everything that had happened and with the risks they faced out in the streets, the sight of that table and cushions took all of that away for a few seconds. Before they were disciples, they had all been part of good Jewish ...
Luke 1:67-80, Luke 1:57-66, Luke 1:46-56, Luke 1:39-45, Luke 1:26-38, Luke 1:5-25, Luke 1:1-4
Sermon
Lori Wagner
Animation: Music: To God Be the Glory [You can have it playing just before the sermon. There are a lot of good versions, both old and new. You can also play a YouTube for your people.] To God be the glory! Say it with me: To God be the glory! Now I want you to repeat that phrase after me, like a refrain. Each time I speak a line, I want you to respond with: To God be the glory! Ok? Let’s try it! “The weather is beautiful today!” [To God be the glory!] The beginning of the season of advent has come upon us ...
“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” (Jeremiah 17:9) Prop: a white linen cloth… or apron For centuries, pastors have been called a “man” or “woman” of the cloth. I always wondered about that phrase. When I looked it up, I saw that in fact, many people used to be called people of the cloth –bakers, kitchen workers, tradesmen, all who worked primarily in service or handworking positions to others. Later, the term remained only for the clergy, who also wore ...
Today we continue the sermon started last week. Our text is the familiar story of the talents in Matthew 25. We are concentrating on the care of the earth and its environment as an example of a talent - a responsibility - that God has given us. God has entrusted to us this property to care for. We are asking what it means to be a responsible steward of creation? And what are the consequences if we bury this talent? When you listen to the tone of a person's voice you can often catch a feeling of how serious ...
Naomi’s Strategy: Naomi is Ruth’s mother-in-law (khamot, 2:23). This feminine form of kham (“father-in-law”) is widely perceived by lexicographers to be a nominal derivative of the unattested verb *khamah. Cognates of this word appear in extrabiblical literature (Arabic khamay, “to protect, defend”; OSA ?mh, “sacred precinct, protective association”), and the root idea seems to be protection, shelter, or refuge. An Arabic attorney, for example, is a mu?amin (“protector”), while an Egyptian “protector” is a ...
Even though we know we can’t do it we all have tried at one time or another. Even though we know it won’t work we’ve all taken our shot at it. Even though we know deep down it really doesn’t do any good we do it anyway. I am talking about bargaining with God. We’ve all done it. We’ve all tried to bargain with God to get God to meet us on our terms: “God, if you’ll do this I’ll do that” or “God if you will just come through this one time I promise I’ll do this or do that.” That desire goes all the way back ...
Today I continue our series “Pop Verses.” We are taking a closer look at some of the most popular Bible verses. We are finding out why they are so popular and how they apply to our lives. Quite often our favorite verses are just that – they’re verses. They’re not read in context. This can lead to a misunderstanding about the meaning of the verse. I believe this series is giving us a lot of food for thought about these popular verses. Today our pop verses come from the prophet Isaiah. It is a beautiful ...
I am told there are at least eight million cats and eleven million dogs in the Big Apple. Since New York is mainly concrete and steel, when you have a pet that dies, you can't just go out in the back yard and bury it. In response, city officials decided that for fifty dollars they would dispose of your pet for you. Now in that grand city was a certain enterprising lady. She thought to herself, “I can render a service.” So she placed an ad in the paper: "When your pet dies, I will take care of the carcass ...
Sherry was struggling with some personal issues in her life. She would tell you that she was having a difficult time forgiving someone at work who purposely wronged her, leading to her eventual demotion. Sherry was upset with the person and could not even think of forgiving him. Her loss of income placed a financial hardship on her family. She was really struggling and trying to do what was best, but it certainly was not easy. Sherry and her family were in church one particular Sunday morning when during ...
I once visited a church in which the minister delivered what seemed at the time to be an interesting sermon, but I couldn't quite grasp the real thrust of the message, because it was delivered in a monotone, most of it read with little warmth or enthusiasm. [The church secretary] agreed to mail me a copy of the sermon I'd just heard. When the sermon arrived in the mail and I read it, I realized that the structure of the message was coherent and sound and the points well made. I could hardly believe I was ...