Have you heard the old story about the young man who enthusiastically joined the monastery? Wanting the highest and the best, the young monk immediately took the vow of silence. The solemn vow meant the monk could only speak two words a year and those were reserved for his annual evaluation with the Abbott. The first year passed and the Abbot asked the monk how he was doing. Without hesitation the monk replied, “Food Bad." Another year passed and the Abbott again asked the monk how he was doing. The monk ...
Yogi Berra, the great baseball player of an earlier age, was known for his unusual and creative use of the English language. In giving directions to his home, for example, he often told people, "When you come to the fork in the road, take it." His formula for success, as some heard it, was this: "Ninety percent perspiration, and the rest mostly just plain hard work." Then there was the time he went to a restaurant by himself and ordered a large pizza. The waitress asked if he would like it cut into four or ...
Some time ago, I was riding a train through central England and a man boarded at one of the stops. As he looked for a seat, he saw my face and beamed at me with great joy. "Hi, Will!" he said brightly, in a wonderful British accent. Unfortunately, I'm not Will. When he sat next to me and I opened my mouth to protest his mistaken notion of who I was, my flat American English paved the way for his embarrassment. Obviously, I was not the person he expected. Nevertheless, we got along "brilliantly," as the ...
Late one night, Pastor Bill was driving home after spending the past 23 hours in the hospital with his wife, celebrating the birth of their son. It had been a glorious day. His wife was peacefully resting. His extended family was ecstatic. His son was healthy. Surely God was in heaven and all was right with the world. As he drove through the city streets, Pastor Bill began to think about all the plans he had to increase parish worship attendance and multiply its Sunday offerings. He reflected upon the ...
Turn the page, and the story is suddenly different. When we close the book of Genesis, the descendants of Jacob — that is, the children of Israel — are comfortably situated as honored guests in the land of Egypt. And the very best part of the land of Egypt, at that. Jacob's son, Joseph, is a local hero, having navigated the nation (and much of the region) through a devastating period of famine. The Egyptians, along with his own kin, mourn his passing. But turn the page, and the story is suddenly different ...
Arnold Toivonen was headed to work at 5:06 a.m. Monday morning on a wet highway winding east through the dark pines that came crowding up close to the road from out of the spring fog. Arnold worked at the Caterpillar shop in town, crawling into the iron bellies of enormous Caterpillar tractors, scraping his knuckles on their cold, sharp innards, dropping heavy wrenches on the concrete with that satisfying metallic ring, and wiping his greasy hands on gray cloths while he stood around talking with his ...
One of my favorite comedians was Danny Kaye. I loved his movies and one of my favorites was the Court Jester. In this movie Danny Kaye is a volunteer with "The Fox" a Robin Hood type character who is trying to protect the rightful heir of the throne (an infant). Danny Kaye takes the place of the new Court Jester, Giacomo, to gain access to the throne and a key that will let "The Fox" and his men into the city through a secret tunnel. It's all typical Danny Kaye fair. One of my favorite scenes is the ...
2058. If You Just Hold Up Your Head
Luke 18:1-8
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In a Peanut's cartoon Lucy encourages Charlie Brown: "Look at it this way, Charlie Brown," she consoles. "These are your bitter days. These are the days of your hardship and struggle ..." The next frame goes on: "... but if you just hold your head up high and keep on fighting, you'll triumph!" "Gee, do you really think so, Lucy?" Charlie asks. As she walks away Lucy says: "Frankly, no!" Hope is like that. We speak of it more often than we believe in it. Hope is not a strong word for us. It has more to do ...
One brief, sunny morning a woman looked out her living room window and was amazed to discover a dead mule on her lawn. Immediately she called the sanitation department and asked them to remove the carcass. But by the time the work-crew arrived, she had changed her mind. She gave the men $100.00 each, instructing them to carry the mule upstairs and to deposit it in the bathtub. After they had dutifully followed her instructions, one of the workers asked why she wanted the dead mule in her bathtub. She said ...
“Congratulations, today’s your day. You’re off to great places. You’re off and away. You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.” Those rhythmic words of advice come from the delightful little book by Dr. Seuss titled Oh, the Places You’ll Go! (1) “You’re on your own,” he continues. “And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go.” It’s up to us, says Dr. Seuss. The world is ours and we are free to choose what kind ...
Almost all denominations, or what I call “tribes,” used to be able to boast an extensive farm system for growing the next generation of leaders. The past two decades have seen a gradual dismantling of that farm system. But you can still see features of it. Starting with the cradle roll and ending with the theological seminary, the church built for its future just like sports teams built for their future in a farm system. One of the most important vestiges in the church’s farm system is summer camp. How ...
Actions and words are both important, but sometimes actions do speak louder than words. Jesus is coming to the end of his ministry. He knows his time is short. He is aware that before much longer his days of teaching and preaching with his disciples will come to an end, a brutal and terrifying end, as he will be handed over, tortured, harassed, mocked, and finally crucified. As our Lord approaches the end of his life, he draws near to the source of life and in a way he summarizes the work that he has done ...
Redeemer, Word made flesh, Messiah, Savior, Son of God, Prince of Peace, Christ, Good Shepherd. There are many different terms that are used in the New Testament to describe who Jesus was. When you start to look at all these terms a couple of things become clear. First of all, Jesus was not a one-dimensional person and secondly, there are many ways of interpreting who he was and what he was all about. The writer of Hebrews has a unique way of describing who Jesus was. Hebrews is the only book in the New ...
A man from Johnstown, Pennsylvania, died and went to heaven. Saint Peter was directing the activities and explained to him, "Each Friday we have a get-together for the new members. To break the ice, every new member must make a speech to all the others here, on any subject desired." The man from Johnstown said, "I think I'll talk on the Johnstown flood." Saint Peter replied, "I think it's all right but I'd better warn you; Noah will be in the audience." The story of Noah's ark has its origins in ancient ...
Like the short story that gave structure to the book of Job, so the book of Ruth is considered to be a finely honed literary piece, often called a novella. It is meant to exhibit exemplary behavior. Just as Job proved faithful through good fortune and ill, so the characters in the book of Ruth are equally laudatory. The story starts with an Israelite family in the time of the judges. (This historical setting becomes the reason that Ruth was put right after the book of Judges in the Septuagint.) This family ...
2066. A Friend In Me
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Throughout his administration, Abraham Lincoln was a president under fire, especially during the scarring years of the Civil War. And though he knew he would make errors of office, he resolved never to compromise his integrity. So strong was this resolve that he once said, "I desire so to conduct the affairs of this administration that if at the end, when I come to lay down the reins of power, I have lost every other friend on earth, I shall at least have one friend left, and that friend shall be down ...
Dennis Wilson is a backup singer in the country music’s unofficial capital, Nashville, Tennessee. In the book Real Country Humor Wilson tells a true story about a friend of his who sings professionally at funerals and weddings. Sometime back this friend got a call from a lady whose husband had died of a heart attack. She said, “I heard you sing at my cousin’s funeral, and I wondered if you’d sing at my husband’s funeral. He just died.” Wilson’s friend said, “Yes, ma’am, that’s what I do. Did you have ...
In David Redding’s book, Before You Call, I Will Answer, we get a vivid description of the power and destruction of war. We follow the Confederate and Union armies as they lock horns during the Battle of Fredericksburg. The Confederate army gained a stronghold atop a hill called Marye’s Heights and slaughtered the Union army below with relative ease. However, one young Confederate soldier, Sergeant Richard Kirkland wrestled with his conscience. He simply could not bear the carnage before him. Finally, he ...
Wesley D. Tracy tells about a woman whom he calls Kate Dowd. That is not her real name, but she is a real person. Kate, a dedicated wife and mother, volunteered at her church, helped with Cub Scouts, tatted lace, and knitted scarves. Then she discovered something that was more exciting than all the rest of her activities combined riverboat gambling. Almost immediately her life was completely changed and not for the better. Kate would cross the river daily to Illinois and board either the Alton Belle or the ...
After this second Sunday of Christmas, the church will enter the season of Epiphany. Epiphany officially begins on January 6. Epiphany is the time the church commemorates the coming of the magi as the first manifestation of Christ to the Gentiles. The magi, traditionally called the wise men, had discovered a new star shining in the heavens. They believed it announced the birth of a divine being. After traveling thousands of miles using the light of the star as their compass, they stopped in Jerusalem, ...
“I want to be alone.” That was the famous declaration made by the early Swedish film star and glamour girl Greta Garbo (1905-1990). But it was that declaration that jinxed her search for solitude. A vast cast of has-been, over-the-hill actors and actresses struggled to stay in focus but swiftly faded out of the limelight and into obscurity. But Garbo, by her very insistence on alone-time, was hounded by media hangers-on until her death in 1990. To get a picture of Greta Garbo remained a paparazzi “holy ...
Today is "Temptation Sunday." Every year on the first Sunday in Lent we focus our attention on the story of the temptation of Jesus. It is a story that has captured the imagination of Christians for centuries. They have sought to portray in art what it must have been like for Jesus to have been tempted by the devil. The picture on your sermon outline this morning portraying this ugly, grotesque, devilish creature is typical of the way the evil one has been portrayed. If the devil looked like this, you ...
"All scripture is inspired by God" (2 Timothy 3:16). There was a woman who called her pastor late one night in a panic and said, "Pastor, quickly, tell me what I believe." Another believer from a different church who challenged her about her beliefs had cornered her. She quickly found that she could not articulate the basic teachings of her church. "Pastor, quickly, tell me what I believe." There may be more than one person gathering in worship this morning who, if hard pressed, may be less than clear ...
We are not citizens of this world trying to make our way to heaven; we are citizens of heaven trying to make our way through this world ... We are not to live so as to earn God's love, inherit heaven, and purchase our salvation ... [these] are gifts bought by Jesus on the cross ... We are to live as God's redeemed, as heirs of heaven, and citizens of another land: the kingdom of God. Because of God's redemption we are now on a journey home! "... a home we know will have the lights on and the door open and ...
Listen to the sound of the trumpet. What do you hear? Sounds evoke feelings, of course. And so what you and I hear takes place as much in our hearts as in our eardrums. What a sound elicits in our hearts depends upon our experience and association with that sound. Some sounds, you know, are so inherently appealing that their effect is almost universally positive: a baby's giggle, for example, or the sounds of nature on a quiet summer evening come to mind. By contrast, certain other sounds have a ...