... play 13!” “But, Randy,” the coach shouted, “8 and 7 don’t add up to 13!” Randy reflected for a moment and answered with a smirk, “You’re right coach! And if I had been as smart as you are, we would have lost the game!” (1) I guess the moral of this story is that sometimes you need more than knowledge to win a football game. Knowledge will only take you so far. The great preacher Harry Emerson Fosdick once told about a young man at a university who left a manuscript with his advisor for ...
... one day and asked to speak to the "head hog at the trough." The secretary was a little taken aback by this guys attitude and told him that was no way to talk about their pastor. He in turn replied, "Well if that's the way you feel, then I guess I won't give this check for $10,000 I was going to give." To which the secretary replied, "No, no. Wait. I'll see if the big pig is in his office." Have you ever noticed that for some reason, pigs and money seem to go together. We save ...
... when school was out, Frank raced home as fast as he could, and as he went through his front door, he was sobbing. His father met him: "Son, what's wrong?" Frank said: "Dad, I've got to talk to you. I told a big lie in school today." "I guess you had better tell me about it, son." So Frank told the story. When he was through, his Dad put his arms around him and said: "It's all right, son. You didn't really tell a lie; you just got the family members mixed up. Mr. Johnson's not ...
... daring escape under cover of night in a homemade boat. But that's not the end of the story! They sailed straight into a violent storm. Pham reports that they would have all been lost, if it hadn't been for the expert sailing skills of, you guessed it, the four Vietcong soldiers. The escapees landed safely in Thailand. Eventually, Hien Pham emigrated to the United States, where he made a new life for himself. (5) He proved the truth of verse 35: "For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those ...
1930. A Hundred Dollar Word
Luke 17:11-19
Illustration
Vince Gerhardy
Who is this man? He lived from 1865 to 1936. He was English, born in Bombay, India. He wrote poetry and is the author of books like Captains Courageous, How the Leopard Got His Spots, and the Jungle Books. If you guessed Rudyard Kipling then you were right. The now famous Jungle Book Stories have been made into a number of movie length films. Kipling's writings not only made him famous but also brought him a fortune. A newspaper reporter came up to him once and said, "Mr. Kipling, I just ...
... he had learned from as a child. Timothy’s mentor in the faith had been no less than Paul himself: the apostle, herald, and teacher appointed by Christ to carry the gospel into the Gentile world. There could be no cause to doubt or second-guess the authenticity of the lessons Timothy had learned from Paul. But the apostle of the new also called on his protégé to remember the old, the “sacred writings” of Hebrew scripture he had been taught and steeped in from earliest childhood. The message Timothy ...
1932. A People of Prayer
Luke 18:1-8
Illustration
Brian Stoffregen
I know of a pastor who regularly uses his church directory to pray for the members by name. Although he didn't say it, my guess is that his prayers do much to change him and his relationship to those members. Within the gospel of Luke, there is abundant encouragement to pray. There are examples of Jesus' praying - if he needed to pray, how much more do we? If nothing else, during the period when we are waiting for the kingdom to come, we are to be people of prayer.
... the war leader, the award-winning author, the master speechmaker, or the astute politician come easily; but not images of Churchill the devoted father and grandfather not the kind of man who might need a little girl’s hug on a lonely Christmas Eve. (3) I guess all of us need a hug on Christmas Eve, particularly from a child. There’s something about a baby or a young child. That’s one reason Christmas Eve is so wonderful the joy of anticipation that we see in our children’s eyes. God entered ...
1934. Three Secrets of a Life Well Lived - Sermon Starter
2 Tim 3:10 - 4:8
Illustration
Brett Blair
... the pictures we have seen from Afghanistan these past few weeks and you get an idea of hardships the Apostle Paul faced as he traveled for 20 years and thousands of miles all over the Roman world. And now the end was near for Paul. This was not just a guess; it was certainty. He was under house arrest in Rome. He was under no illusion about his fate. So it was that he took pen in hand and wrote a parting letter to his friend and close associate Timothy of Ephesus. He writes: "I have fought the good fight, I ...
1935. What Kind of Sinners Can Be Members
Luke 18:9-14
Illustration
Larry R. Kalajainen
... at what she was doing. Then she stood and testified that she believed God had forgiven her for her past life, and she now wanted to become a member of the church. For a few moments, the silence was deafening. Finally, Samuel Colgate arose and said, "I guess we blundered when we prayed that the Lord would save sinners. We forgot to specify what kind of sinners. We'd better ask him to forgive us for this oversight. The Holy Spirit has touched this woman and made her truly repentant, but the Lord apparently ...
1936. The Worship Wars
Luke 18:9-14
Illustration
Stephen M. Crotts
... might point out that Jesus said even though this man went to church, he was not a part of the community for he was "standing by himself." And Jesus said pointedly that he was never forgiven by God, for "all who exalt themselves will be humbled." I guess you might say he was so self-conscious he lost his God-consciousness. The second gentleman, however, the tax collector, "went down to his home justified." It seems that even though he was not satisfied with himself, God was. So, from the text, which of these ...
... Just a bum. Been one all her life,” says Streep. “And before that?” Nicholson asks. “She was a whore in Alaska,” says Streep. “She hasn’t been a whore all her life,” says Nicholson. “Before that?” “I dunno,” Streep replies. “Just a little kid, I guess.” “Well a little kid’s something. It’s not a bum and it’s not a whore. It’s something. Let’s take her in.” Comments writer Philip Yancy: “The two vagrants were seeing the Eskimo woman through the lens of grace. Where ...
1938. Tradition!
Luke 20:27-38
Illustration
Johnny Dean
... her why she always cut off both ends of the ham before she cooked it. "Well, sweetheart, " her grandmother said, "the first oven we owned wasn't big enough to put a whole ham in, so I had to cut the ends off to make it fit. After that, I guess it just became a habit!" You see? That's traditionalism – when we do whatever we do without knowing why we do it, but continue to do it anyway because that's what we've always done! Does that make sense?
1939. Looking Ahead to the Transition
Luke 20:27-38
Illustration
King Duncan
... of these three brothers died as a young adult after a prolonged illness. The family was devastated. He was so young and he was a fine young man. But now it was this family's turn to receive friends at the local funeral home. You may have guessed it. One of the floral arrangements that had been set up in the chapel for the receiving of friends was the one with the telephone and the ribbon with the words, "Jesus called." The two surviving brothers were enraged. Who could have sent this arrangement that they ...
1940. Redeemed, Redeemed, Redeemed!
Matthew 24:36-51
Illustration
Brett Blair
... of the sanctuary carrying a rusty cage in which several birds fluttered nervously. Gordon inquired, "Son, where did you get those birds?" The boy replied, "I trapped them out in the field." "What are you going to do with them?" "I'm going to play with them, and then I guess I'll just feed them to an old cat we have at home." When Gordon offered to buy them, the lad exclaimed, "Mister, you don't want them, they're just little old wild birds and can't sing very well." Gordon replied, "I'll give you $2 for the ...
... and left for Egypt . . .” That was Joseph. A man of integrity; a man of faith. Do you think it might make a difference if all the people who call Jesus Lord had that kind of integrity, that kind of complete trust in God’s will and God’s way? My guess is that it would change the world overnight. The first thing we need to do after Christmas is to keep trusting God. The second thing we need to do is to take care of those we love. That was Joseph’s primary concern. He loved Mary and he loved their ...
... the slimy pit. So what do you do when you find yourself in a slimy pit? The best thing we can do is to call out to God. “I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry . . .” Have you ever cried out to God? My guess is that most of us have at some time in our lives, for one reason or another. Perhaps it was in a time of personal need. Like Mrs. Brigante you found yourself teetering on the edge of disaster. Perhaps this impending disaster was a medical emergency, a business failure, a ...
... to play baseball in Japan, he was asked what daily life was like in Japan. He replied that the language was the most difficult and different feature. “It’s crazy,” he said. “The only American words I saw were Sony and Mitsubishi.” (1) Well, I guess those are American words. There is no limit to the foolish things people do and say particularly our legislators. A few years back a man named Robert W. Pelton did some research on laws that have been passed with regard to behavior in churches. Some of ...
... would testify later, turning his body sideways and digging into his pocket for something. Then the immigrant, who spoke very little English, pulled a black object from his pocket and pointed it toward the officers in the dim light of the stairwell. You can probably guess the rest of the story. Forty-two gunshots later the officers found themselves leaning over the immigrant’s bullet‑riddled body. They found the object that was in his hand was his wallet which he was trying to show them. (2) That’s the ...
... evangelist and faith healer Oral Roberts headed a vast TV empire. He became so famous that he became the target of comedians. According to one joke Simon Peter knocks on the door to God’s office in heaven and says, “You’ll never guess who just arrived. It’s the Oral Roberts.” “Show him in,” God says. As Roberts enters the office, God asks, “Are you the Oral Roberts?” “Yes,” he admits. “Well,” God says, “I’ve got this aching shoulder. . . .” (6) Pastor Roberts undoubtedly has ...
... of the Caribbean, but real life pirates in places like Somalia desperate, violent men who have garnered ransoms of millions of dollars by taking hostages from ships. If I were to ask you to name a famous pirate from history, who would it be? My guess is that many of you would come up with the name Blackbeard. Blackbeard was a notorious English pirate who operated around the West Indies and the eastern coast of the American colonies during the early 18th century. There was an article in the magazine American ...
... all of the men really liked the inscription because it so aptly described the wonderful change they had seen in his life. It turned out that his wife had sewn these words that she had seen on a store on her husband’s shirt, “UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT.” (3) I guess that said it all. Since they had met Christ, their lives were under new management. You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to testify to the power of God in your life. If Christ has touched you, healed you, given you a reason to go on, if you ...
1948. A Better Influence
Matthew 5:13-16
Illustration
Eric Ritz
One of my favorite Peanuts cartoons showed Peppermint Patty talking to Charlie Brown. She said, "Guess what, Chuck. The first day of school and I got sent to the principal's office. It was your fault, Chuck." He said, "My fault? How could it be my fault? Why do you say everything is my fault?" She said, "You're my friend, aren't you, Chuck? You should have been a better influence on me."
1949. The Effect of Insult
Matt 5:21-22
Illustration
David E. Leininger
... tell you about an elderly lady, a shy and sensitive lady who lived to be just three weeks shy of her 100th birthday. When she was a young girl, about ten years old or so, somebody told her that she had a terrible singing voice. Now, most of us, I guess, would not let that remark bother us particularly, but it DID bother this lady. Ten years old is a tender age. It bothered her so much that, for the remaining 90 years of her life, she never sang another note. No one had any idea whether she had a good ...
... at his rather plain appearance. He said that sometimes he felt like the ugly man who met an old woman traveling through a forest. The old woman said, “You’re the ugliest man I ever saw.” “I can’t help it,” the ugly man said. “No, I guess not,” the woman admitted, “but the least you could do is stay home.” One reason Lincoln was a great man was his ability to laugh at himself. One of the most popular films of recent years was a movie about a mentally challenged man named Forrest Gump ...