When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet in his private heart no man much respects himself.Mark Twain
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.Mark Twain
Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which, before their union, were not perceived to have any relation.Mark Twain
Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do, and play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do.Mark Twain
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great people make you feel that you, too, can become great.Mark Twain
To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did; I ought to know because I have done it a thousand times.Mark Twain
Don't complain and talk about all your problems. 80 percent of people don't care; the other 20 percent will think you deserve them.Mark Twain
We owe a deep debt of gratitude to Adam, the first great benefactor of the human race: he brought death into the world.Mark Twain
The first half of life consists of the capacity to enjoy without the chance; the last half consists of the chance without the capacity.Mark Twain
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.Mark Twain
Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.Mark Twain
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like and do what you'd rather not.Mark Twain
