Shridhar Chillal of India hasn't cut the nails of his left hand since 1952. That's almost fifty years ago! No surprise that Shridhar holds the Guinness world record for long fingernails. But Shridhar reportedly doesn't care about fame or even fingernails. He has only one goal: to make money out of his dubious accomplishment. "I haven't had a good night's sleep for 30 years," he complains. He had a vision of how his nails would look one day in a glass case attached to a plaster replica of his 56-year-old ...
One of my favorite PEANUTS cartoons has Lucy coming to Charlie Brown and saying, "Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown. Since it’s this time of the season, I think we ought to bury past differences and try to be kind." Charlie Brown asks, "Why does it just have to be this time of the season? Why can’t it be all year long?" Lucy looks at him and exclaims, "What are you, some kind of fanatic?" One more Peanuts bit of wisdom. Lucy has a score to settle with Charlie Brown. She chases him, shouting, "I’ll get you, ...
[Note: While King Duncan is enjoying a well deserved retirement we are going back to his earliest sermons and renewing them. The newly modernized sermon is shown first and below, for reference sake, is the old sermon. We will continue this updating throughout the year bringing fresh takes on King's best sermons.] Original Name: Preparing for a Royal Visit New Name: Getting Ready A little boy attended his first symphony concert. He was excited by the splendid hall, the beautiful people in all their formal ...
It's time for us to visit again with our old friend Charlie Brown. Charlie, Linus, and Lucy are on their way to school. It's show and tell day. Lucy asks Linus if he has remembered to bring anything for show and tell. "Yes," Linus answers, "I have a couple of things here to show the class." He then unfolds some papers. "These are copies I've been making of some of the Dead Sea scrolls," he says. Holding them up for Charlie Brown and Lucy to inspect he continues."This is a duplicate of the scroll of Isaiah ...
A thirteenyearold boy once read about Dr. Albert Schweitzer's work in Africa. He wanted to help. He had enough money to buy one bottle of aspirin. He wrote to the Air Force and asked if they could fly over Dr. Schweitzer's hospital and drop the bottle down to him. A radio station broadcast the story about this young fellow's concern for helping others. Others responded as well. Eventually, he was flown by the government to Schweitzer's hospital along with four and onehalf tons of medical supplies worth $ ...
The story is told of a female college sophomore who decided it was about time she experienced her first official date. Her roommate, who was a knowledgeable junior, asked whether she preferred Southern boys or Northern boys. Since she was from South Dakota she was unaware of such nuances in the male gender and asked what the difference was. Her worldly-wise roommate answered, "Southern boys are more romantic. They will take you walking in the moonlight and whisper sweet nothings in your ear. Northern boys ...
A few years ago a large group of Vietnam veterans met in New York to commemorate the Vietnam War and its effects on their lives. Many were still suffering emotional wounds from that devastating conflict. A Vietnamese Buddhist monk came to the gathering and told a moving story. During the war, a young Vietnamese woman was killed. She left behind her husband and her young son. The husband, needing to provide for himself and the boy, traveled far and wide looking for odd jobs. Often he left the child with ...
The world is getting scarier all the time. You never know what perfectly terrifying thing will happen next, even in a small town. A newspaper column years ago by Lydel Sims tells the fearful experience of Mrs. Wilma Sullivan, a widow who lives alone in Portageville, Missouri. "You just won't believe what happened to her the other night when she was sleeping in her quiet house on a quiet street among quiet and friendly neighbors. She had gone to bed about 11:30...Not that she had worried unduly about her ...
It was a simple statement but still it hurt. "SEE, this man eats with sinners and tax collectors." They hurt because I was one of those tax-collectors. Tax collectors are never popular. "Adopt a flat tax," said Steve Forbes in the primary campaigns, "and dismantle the Internal Revenue Service." "I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States," said Arthur Godfrey. "The only thing is ” I could be just as proud for half the money." "President Clinton says he looks forward to the day a citizen can call the ...
Newsweek magazine carried an interesting article sometime back about a controversy that has been brewing down in Louisiana. Let me share it with you: "Even if it did double as a bug zapper (it doesn't), the big blue neon JESUS sign outside the Church of Abundant Life in Harvey, Louisiana, would have to go. So say Jefferson Parish officials, who claim they inadvertently approved installation of the five-foot-high, 21-foot-wide sign last November. Now they're fighting to unplug the $5,000 Savior, saying it ...
John A. Davis mailed a Christmas card to his brother in December 1942. Nearly 55 years later it showed up at a post office in Tinley Park, Illinois. Davis had long ago figured the card, sent from Jackson, Miss., to Maryville, Tenn., got lost. The long-lost card raised eyebrows at the Tinley Park post office, and Davis' family learned about it through a newspaper account. The supervisor had sent the card on to Maryville but got it back when Davis contacted him. "There is a lot of nostalgia in this thing. I' ...
In his book, JUST AS LONG AS I'M RIDING UP FRONT, Ray McIver tells of belonging to the Kiwanis club in the 1950s in the small town of San Marcos, Texas. The Kiwanians were a lively group, says McIver, all except for Roger Shelton. Roger came to meetings late, sat by himself, and rarely said a word. The Kiwanians would usually have entertainment of some kind before they got down to club business. At one particular meeting, the entertainment consisted of a barbershop quartet composed of local college ...
Beverly Masek is a Native American living in Alaska. Beverly was born and raised in Anvik, a very small village in the interior of Alaska with a population of about seventy people. Anvik is one of the sites on the legendary Iditarod. The Iditarod is a dog sled race where one person runs through blizzards, ice and wilderness for 1,029 miles! The racer is all alone with help from no other human being. Just the dog team. The musher, as they are called, has to provide for himself or herself as well as the dogs ...
"Behold, the potter was working at the wheel And the vessel that he was making of clay was spoiled in the hand of the potter. So he made it over reworking it into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to make it." (Jeremiah 18:3,4 Amplified Bible) It was a classic episode of "I Love Lucy." Lucy had taken a job at a candy factory and she was being trained on the first day of her new job. It was Lucy's duty to stand at a conveyor belt with pieces of candy continuously passing in front of her. She ...
Sometimes the words of Jesus, taken out of context, can cause us real problems. Imagine if you and I were sales people and we had invited Jesus to speak at our annual sales banquet. Imagine Jesus standing up as the guest speaker, looking us over with a strange mixture of anger and compassion, and then speaking these words: "But woe to you who are rich, for you have already received your comfort. Woe to you who are well fed now, for you will go hungry. Woe to you who laugh now, for you will mourn and weep. ...
To help us get this New Year off to a good start, I thought you might like to hear one person's resolutions--not for this year but for New Year's past. Resolution #1 1994: I will try to be a better husband to Marge. 1995: I will not leave Marge. 1996: I will try for a reconciliation with Marge. 1997: I will try to be a better husband to Wanda. Resolution #2 1994: I will read at least 20 good books a year. 1995: I will read at least 10 books a year. 1996: I will read 5 books a year. 1997: I will finish [ ...
Recently I heard about a Scotchman who was admitted to Oxford University. He moved into a dormitory. His clan was excited that one of their own made it into such an exclusive school. His mother worried, though, how he'd do with all those snobbish Brits in a strange land. She gave him a month to settle in, and then called him. "How do you find the English students, Donald?" she asked. "Oh Mother," he said, "they are strange and noisy people. The one on this side bangs his head against the wall all night and ...
The teacher of a junior high class was trying to illustrate the word miracle. "Young people," he said, "Suppose I stood on the roof of a 10-story building, lost my balance and fell off. Then all of a sudden, in midair, a whirlwind swept me up and brought me safely to the ground. Now what word would you use to describe this?" After a long silence a boy raised his hand and asked, "Luck?" "True, true," replied the teacher. "It could be luck. But that's not the word I wanted. I'll repeat the story. There I am ...
A man was traveling from Indianapolis, Indiana to Chicago, Illinois. He didn't realize that Indianapolis is on Eastern Standard Time and Chicago is on Central Standard Time. He inquired at the Indianapolis airport about a plane to Chicago. “The next flight leaves at 1:00 p.m.," a ticket agent said, “and arrives in Chicago at 1:01 p.m." “Would you repeat that, please?" the startled traveler asked. “The next flight leaves at 1:00 p.m.," the ticket agent repeated, “and arrives in Chicago at 1:01 p.m. Do you ...
Ignace Paderewski, the famous Polish pianist, made his first tour of the U.S. in 1891. He soon won over American audiences with his powerful playing. In one concert in New York, Paderewski severely injured his hand. The injury, which caused him to lose the use of one of his fingers, left him in constant pain, but he insisted on continuing his tour. In all, he played 107 concerts on that tour. In 1892, Paderewski returned to the States for a second successful concert tour. At one point on this tour, he ...
Everyone knows about the Good Samaritan. He is one of the best-known characters in history. We know he belonged to a despised people--Samaritans--people who did not keep the laws in the prescribed way and who had intermarried with foreigners. We know he was the surprise hero in Jesus' parable that bears his name. We know he was a generous and compassionate man who paid an innkeeper out of his own pocket for the upkeep of a stranger who had been stripped, robbed, beaten and left for dead beside the road to ...
Where can I be safe? That is a question many people are asking. All of us want to know that our home is safe, our family is safe, that those we love are protected. Some unknown wit has suggested some signs that you can put around your home to keep it safe from burglars. Perhaps you will find these signs helpful: Sign #1. Dear Mr. Butcher, starting tomorrow, please leave eight pounds of meat for Brutus. Six pounds only makes him angry and vicious! Sign #2. Dear Mr. Mailman, Please be sure to keep all parts ...
A group of friends went deer hunting. They separated into pairs. That night, one hunter returned alone, staggering under an eight-point buck. The other hunters asked, "Where's Harry?" The lone hunter replied, "Harry fainted a couple miles up the trail." The others couldn't believe it. "You mean you left him lying there and carried the deer back instead?" The man answered, "It was a tough call, but I figured no one was going to steal Harry." To this deer hunter it was simply a matter of priorities. And one ...
Somebody ought to write a book titled, "Preachers Are Funny Creatures." It makes no difference if they are pastors, priests or rabbis--people who have the wonderful privilege as I do of standing in a pulpit each week are somewhat weird. Like the Reverend Eugene Magee. Magee is an enthusiastic pastor who does not wear a robe. His sanctuary is plainer than most, adorned only by a cross and an American flag. Magee likes to wave his arms to emphasize important points in his sermons. Unfortunately, he is so ...
Pastor Kent Crockett tells a powerful story in his book, I Once Was Blind, But Now I Squint. Years ago Kent and his wife Cindy recorded many of their family highlights using an 8mm home movie camera. Some of you are too young to even know about 8mm film. Others of you took your first home movies with them. They were silent, and the picture wasn't very sharp. But they were sufficient to capture some of the important moments in your life. Kent and Cindy collected years of precious memories on numerous spools ...