... great success, and its influence stayed with these students long after they graduated from college. (3) Rather than being a unifying force in society, the Pharisees had become a divisive force. Rather than being inclusive, they had become exclusive. Rather than raising the self-esteem of the people around them, they made others feel unworthy, unclean. It was not so much that their hearts were dirty, but that they were cold and unfeeling. III. What they did not see was that God prefers bridges to walls. The ...
... lives matter. I mention this because how we feel about ourselves will determine the effectiveness of our witness to Christ. There are many people who latch onto Christ because they are disgusted with themselves. And that's good. We need to reach out to him when our self-esteem is dragging the floor. But if we stay disgusted with ourselves, we can never be effective in reaching out to others. Christ has too many followers who feel helpless, defeated, impotent. Let Christ deliver you from your feelings of low ...
... Make citizens of the rejected." Disneyland's mission is: "To provide people happiness." Parenting vision and mission statements can be especially helpful in identifying values, core beliefs, and direction. Diane Loomans wrote: If I had my child to raise all over again, I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later. I'd finger paint more, and point the finger less. I would do less correcting and more connecting. I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes. I would care to know less and know to ...
... say, “well done,” or even, on occasion, to give us extravagant praise. In fact there was an article in a leading magazine a few months back about the challenge many companies have today giving their younger workers constant positive reinforcement. Because of the high self-esteem movement, that is what many of today’s young adults have gotten at home and in school from the day they were born. “You are the greatest! There’s never been anyone like you before!” It’s getting hard for people in our ...
... of creation, a favor when we meet all their challenges for them. Acceptance without challenge is demoralizing indeed. By the same token, challenge without acceptance can hurt people just as well. All too often, I fear, the acceptance that is so crucial to self-esteem is made a conditional thing, tied to the accomplishment of a certain goal. I once knew a person whose parents were extraordinarily ambitious for him. In fact, his whole existence was a pressure cooker of challenge. He brought home a report card ...
... the created, not the Creator. That's a critical view of life. It's Mother's Day and one of the great responsibilities of parenting is helping our children understand they are special without being convinced they are superior. There is a difference between positive self-esteem and arrogance. All children begin life self-centered. When you are a baby it's all about me — my needs, my wants, my desires. It's all about ‘me' when you are a child. Some of you are discovering that it's somewhat the same with ...
... to view the transfigured Christ. They were transformed in their understanding of Jesus. What requires transformation in our lives? For some there is a need to transform attitudes — toward self and others. It is unfortunate but true that too many people have low self-esteem and do not respect nor love themselves sufficiently. These people need to be transformed to look into a mirror and believe fully that the person they see is a son or daughter of God. Some of us need transformation in our attitudes ...
... , companionship. Now we move to the types of needs that are more unique to human beings, the needs that they don’t necessarily share with other species. Fourth on the list are what Maslow called esteem needs. These would include, self-esteem, confidence, achievement, respect of others, and respect by others. And, finally, at the top of the list, the most human of all needs, self-actualization. Maslow identified these as morality, creativity, spontaneity, problem solving, tolerance, acceptance of facts and ...
... , loving others, changes a person. It not only biologically alters your hormones and increases your health, but it boosts your self-esteem and helps you reach your goals. Knowing you are loved for who you are gives you energy to grow and ... We enter into a covenant with God. We gain our feeling of support and respect for who we are from God, and this gives us stability and self-esteem even in the face of trouble. God shows us great love every single day. If we look around us, we will see the signs. We can show ...
... , feelings of worthlessness turn into suspicion and hatred of others. Most of the people who commit suicide have become the victims of this disease. It goes by various names, according to how deeply we feel it - self pity, self depreciation, lack of self worth, low self-esteem, little or no self affirmation. And the awful thing about it is, is that it is so tenacious in the hold that it has upon us. My own confession will make the point. This has been the primary struggle of my life. Coming from a poverty ...
... of a rainbow as soon as you think you've reached its touch-down point, your perspective changes, and the rainbow's end has moved again. In modern psycho-speak, there is a tremendous amount of energy being focused on the whole issue of "self-esteem." Carl Rogers was among the first to popularize this view as he called for the need to "actualize the potential" of one's self through "unconditional self-regard." This psychologically based school of thought has even borrowed the short-form Torah that Paul cites ...
... correctly or incorrectly, of who we are. Many years ago, there was a book about a special character named Bunker Bean. Bunker Bean was orphaned at a young age, and he grew up in different foster homes. Consequently, Bunker had no self-esteem. One day, a spiritual medium, a huckster, moved into Bunker’s boarding house. The medium claimed that Bunker had been Napoleon Bonaparte in another life. Wow! Napoleon Bonaparte was powerful, intelligent, self-confident--the absolute opposite of Bunker Bean. So Bunker ...
... ." This casting of all her burdens upon the Lord is the true mark of faith. It is not the woman’s self-assertion, self-determination, self-effort - just the opposite. This woman’s great faith results from the total surrender of herself - her self-respect, her self-esteem, her self-concern. What better picture could we have in the New Testament to summarize the meaning of faith. When John G. Paton went as a missionary to the cannibals of the South Sea Islands, one of the first things he did was set about ...
... and find it necessary to use fig leaves as a covering against the icy chill of his own ego, scarred by self-hate. To love one’s self is to be free from need for fig leaves and defenses and whatever style of cover-up we choose. Self-respect or self-esteem or self-love is the key to love for others. And the gift of marriage as a gift of love from God is precisely that - the intimate commitment of one’s self to that one person God has given us, for in fulfilling that commitment we are ourselves fulfilled ...
... responsible; let someone else do it." All of these are referred to as cop-outs by those who accomplish things that need doing. "I can't help myself," is a very poor excuse, and is indicative of an unwillingness to conscientiously try. These four words show low self-esteem, and little trust in self and divine assistance. "I don't care," causes people to think that the person saying such words has lost the sense of pride, has closed the door on the possibility of a success and lost the key to self respect and ...
... 's teachings and attitudes reveals that Jesus indeed emphasized the rights, the worth and uniqueness of every person. His ministry broke down artificial and self imposed barriers and broke open the stifled confines of human hearts. He recovered the lost dignity and self esteem in souls who slouched in fear. He encouraged people to claim their God given privileges and stature" (Shelby, Ibid). But you have to balance that strong emphasis of Jesus with His call to be servants, to deny ourselves, to take up the ...
... a way of blowing off steam. (Remember the tongue-in-cheek song "Fie on Goodness!" from Camelot?) For still others, an interest in satanic lyrics or movies that glorify the occult and horror, may indicate psychological problems: a poor self-image, low self-esteem, or (a subtle but major problem with many troubled young people) a fear of success. (Yes ... some people are so accustomed to failure that the prospect of doing well frightens them into deliberate sabotage of their efforts, and into outrageous ...
... of his love, his forgiveness, his grace. Many years ago, there was a book about a special character named Bunker Bean. Bunker Bean was orphaned at a young age, and he grew up in different foster homes. Consequently, Bunker had no self-esteem. One day, a spiritual medium moved into Bunker's boarding house. The medium claimed that Bunker had been Napoleon Bonaparte in another life. Wow! Napoleon Bonaparte was powerful, intelligent, self-confident--the absolute opposite of Bunker Bean. So Bunker began studying ...
... greatest gift to the world is not our good works but our constant prayer and worship. Our first response is not to act but to pray. You and I live in a psychologically self-obsessed and narcissistic culture where everything is about us and our needs and our self-esteem and how we feel about things and what we want and how we think things should be done, and the church of Jesus Christ is a grand protest against such indulgence in the cult of the sovereign self. We are not the center of the universe; God is ...
... Rather humble as a musician despite his fame, Sinatra despised the “me, me, me” sentiment that the song represented. Yet America loved it, especially in the victorious aftermath of World War II. Self-assurance is not a bad thing in itself. We all need a healthy self-esteem in order to function well as human beings on our own and in our relationships. But when we dare to believe that we are entirely capable of directing our own lives and forging our own path without the help of God, our self-reliance can ...
... be unrealistic. If there is an answer, I do not know it. But this I do know: it must be hard, brutally hard, to be blind, even in this age of Braille and radio and records and talking books and special skills to be learned and a large measure of self-esteem to be had for the effort. It is brutally hard to be blind even today, but in Jesus' time it was infinitely harder. For one thing, there was nothing to do for a blind man except to beg. The blind man whom we meet in the ninth chapter of John ...
... Self-denial is not part of our culture's image of the 'good life.' But neither is...Jesus' call for denying oneself to be understood as asceticism or as self-hate. Just as Jesus' call to discipleship is not a joining in the cultural infatuation with self-esteem, neither is it the opposite. Nor is the self-denial to which Jesus calls the opposite of self-fulfillment. Just giving up things will not make one Christian; it will only make one empty. What is difficult for our culture to understand, indeed what it ...
... the honest and the cheat, the faithful and the faithless? "God, I have to thank thee." Who else would we thank? The contrast in the publican is obvious. He represents a fact all too familiar, the obsession of a bad self-image, a total lack of self-esteem. Analysis might suggest that as a child he was controlled at home by guilt, a favorite mechanism of control that parents use. His older brother may have used the putdown to create the atmosphere of inferiority in which he lived and that stayed with him ...
... reach a pinnacle together. Each needs the other, and each is bound to the other, even though it does not always appear to be so. Finally, let us consider the fear of failure. This is more than an intellectual matter. It is a nerve, touching one’s self-esteem. You and I have been taught from childhood to try to succeed at whatever we do. Although the theology is out of date, the idea is still abroad that if one will just try hard enough and think enough positive thoughts, we can succeed at anything. Some ...
... facts." (Daniel Goleman, Vital Lies, Simple Truths: The Psychology of Self-Deception (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1985), 241.) To avoid feelings of guilt, shame, inadequacy, we put up smokescreens, camouflage our errors, cover up our wrongdoings we deceive ourselves to preserve our self-esteem and self-image. The power of self-deception may be one of the greatest powers at work in our world today, it's so prevalent. "Who are they kidding?" Try walking through a mall or an airport and see how people dress ...