... a flute solo that was to be played as if coming from a distance. The conductor had instructed the flutist to stand offstage where he was to count the measures precisely in order to come in at the exact time, since there could be no visual contact between the conductor and the soloist. On the performance night when the time came for the flute solo, the flutist began exactly. The fine, lilting notes floated out beautifully. Then suddenly there was a pinching sour note and the soloist was silent for the rest ...
927. United Brethren
Humor Illustration
... whose leg had been amputated by the Episcopalian in the Catholic hospital. As Providence would have it, a Methodist woman read the Presbyterian ad in the congregational paper and remembered that her husband, who had died a Baptist, had left behind a wooden leg. So she contacted the Salvation Army which sent an emissary to the Methodist woman's home to pick up the Baptist leg. They took the woman's leg to the express office and gave it to a Lutheran express agent who sent it to the Catholic hospital and gave ...
928. No More Songs
Humor Illustration
... soaked and shivering, she did what any compassionate bird owner would do...she reached for the hair dryer and blasted the pet with hot air. Poor Chippie never knew what hit him. A few days after the trauma, the reporter who had initially written about the event contacted Chippie's owner to see how the bird was recovering. "Well," she replied, "Chippie doesn't sing much anymore, he just sits and stares." It's not hard to see why. Sucked in, washed up, and blown over...that's enough to steal the song from the ...
929. Blind Kick
Illustration
Staff
... goal, Daugherty had a little talk with him. He congratulated him on making the point, but asked him why he didn't keep his eyes on the ball to see it through to completion. Kaiser was totally honest with his coach; he said that he had forgotten his contact lenses and was unable to see the goal posts. That was why he hadn't been looking at the ball when it went through. On hearing this, Daugherty's first impulse was to get angry with Kaiser. Going through the whole game without being able to see clearly ...
930. Unheard of In Surgery
Humor Illustration
... . . . that uh . . . thingie. Oh no! I just lost my Rolex. Hey, has anyone ever survived 500 milligrams of this stuff before? Dang it, there go the lights again . . . Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy's got two of 'em. Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens! What's this doing here? I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses. Sterile, shmeril. The floor's clean, right? OK, now take a picture from this angle. What do you mean "You want a divorce"! Dang it! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
... , their take-away kit has in it an incense stick for them to light while they are reading the card, on which is printed what you will be reading below. [If you would like more information, or reproducible copies of the art to use, you can feel free to contact Pierre at pierre@3rdplace.co.za.] 1) The S[c]ent of Hope [Week One] Scentness: The scent of hope: a cool shower, a fresh bar of soap, the cleansing rinse of shampoo running down the drain. Toweling off, naked with the possibility of a brand new start ...
... words. 3. Make [it a habit to take] time to listen to the people around you. (6) This is to say that listening is hard work. It has to be something you are committed to. Listening to your family, listening to your coworkers, listening to those you come into contact with as you go about your daily business. The first duty of love is to listen. Of course, our primary responsibility is to listen to Christ. If we are poor listening to others, think how poor we are at listening to him. Our lesson for the day is ...
933. Com·for·ta·ble
Humor Illustration
... years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock. Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister, 'When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home.' The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town ...
934. Sucked In, Washed Up, Blown Over
Mark 4:35-41
Illustration
Vince Gerhardy
... and shivering, she did what any compassionate bird owner would do . . . she reached for the hair dryer and blasted the pet with hot air. Poor Chippie never knew what hit him. A few days after the trauma, a friend who had heard about Chippie's troubles contacted his owner to see how the bird was recovering. "Well," she replied, "Chippie doesn't sing much anymore - he just sits and stares." Who can blame him? Sucked in, washed up, and blown over . . . That's enough to steal the song from the stoutest heart ...
... people in places where hatred is strong and life is cheap. But what we can do is take responsibility for our lives, to pray for God’s love to reside within us, and then live out that love on a day-to-day basis so that everyone we come into contact with is touched by that love. Do you see any other hope for the world? I don’t know of one. We need leaders and we need citizens who are committed to love, committed to peace and committed to justice in this world . . . or hatred will destroy us all. Surely ...
... the church is to turn the world upside down or better right side up. You and I have a tendency to take the church of Jesus Christ for granted. We see the church as a mere institution as a club, as a place where we can make friends or business contacts. What we fail to see is the church as God’s agent, Christ’s body at work in the world. Christ came into the world to save the world. John 3:17, “For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the ...
... Katrina struck, a local owner of a restaurant challenged her customers to donate money for its victims. After collecting a goodly amount of money, she realized she did not know how to channel it appropriately. She approached her pastor, who made some telephone calls. Contact was made with a local church in Alabama. "Of course we'll accept your money, but what we really need is helping hands." That Sunday the pastor extended the challenge to his members to volunteer their hands in the relief efforts ...
... into parish ministry while Abuelo answered the call to the mission field in Mexico, and Fred and Isabel served there with distinction for half a century. In the Yucatan there is even a Camp Tinley for youngsters named in Abuelo's honor. They all kept contact through the years — the congregation my father served provided financial support for the Presbyterian mission in Mexico. On their occasional furloughs, Abuelo and his family would fly up for a visit (he flew his own plane, and, as a boy, he gave me my ...
... But Christianity says it is of the very essence of life that we must come down. William Barclay, that wonderful New Testament scholar from Scotland, notes that in religion there must be solitude, but there must not be solitariness. The solitude is necessary, for one must keep contact with God, but if we, in our search for solitude, shut ourselves off from one another, if we shut our ears to the appeal of brothers and sisters for help, if we shut our hearts to the cries and tears of things, then that is not ...
... left. She was settling into her new role and doing very well. Hosea and Gomer even had a baby. They named him Jezreel. But apparently Gomer began to get tired of the routine. Hosea was never there - he was always off preaching someplace. Her main social contact was always needed to have his diapers changed. Gomer began to long for some of the excitement of days gone by. Finally she decided, "Why not? What's the harm in spending time with old friends? Who cares if Hosea objects? Who died and left him king ...
... had visited a leper colony and touched the patients, an apparently small thing. But it was as if, in her simple act of grace (for this man), the life of a beautiful young woman was summed up. You see, royals don’t have to touch lepers. They can avoid such contact in a hundred ways, and who would blame them? But Diana did. She touched the lepers, put herself on the same level with them, and did it of her own free will. (4) In that sense Princess Diana was a worthy role model, but she was not perfect just ...
... through all the persecution and affliction that they have suffered (1:4), Paul envisions a God-sized dream for them. What are your God-sized dreams? These are the dreams that you cannot achieve alone with just more education, more hours, more determination, and more contacts. These are dreams that only God can achieve by working through the likes of you, a flawed, cracked vessel. These are dreams that have nothing to do with your quick wit and winning smile. It may be a dream to grow a church that reaches ...
Matthew 5:40, 43-44, Colossians 1:15, 16-19, Matthew 5:3, 6, 11
Sermon
Scott Suskovic
... said, then I'll do it. Let me tell you about Linda. Linda's not right. Linda's from New York where she had a home and a job and family. She said that God put it on her heart to leave it all and do ministry in Romania. She contacted "Smiles," an organization in Great Britain that works with the poor of Romania and told them of her intentions. The director, Kevin Hoy, said, "That's fine but have you been to Romania before?" "No," she replied. "Do you think you should come once before you quit your job and ...
... don’t want you to be in any need. I will serve you, because I came not to be served but to serve. I am a friend, and a member, and a head, and a brother and a sister, and a mother. I am everything for you. Only be in contact with me. I have been poor for you and a wanderer for you, I have been on the cross and in the tomb for you. High above with the Father I mediate for you. Down here I arrived as an ambassador sent by the Father to you. You are everything ...
... don’t want you to be in any need. I will serve you, because I came not to be served but to serve. I am a friend, and a member, and a head, and a brother and a sister, and a mother. I am everything for you. Only be in contact with me. I have been poor for you and a wanderer for you, I have been on the cross and in the tomb for you. High above with the Father I mediate for you. Down here I arrived as an ambassador sent by the Father to you. You are everything ...
... ’s an important part of our lives. I read something funny recently. It was an announcement that was made in the chapel of a very conservative church college some years back. It went something like this: “On this campus there is to be absolutely no physical contact of any kind between male and female students. There is only one legitimate exception to this rule. If a male student happens to see a female student about to fall to the ground, it is permissible to touch her to break her fall. However,” the ...
... study Russian just for this particular moment in his life? Or was it just coincidental? I guess it depends what you believe about the universe. I guess it depends on what you believe about God. The Apostle Paul had many unusual experiences that brought him into contact with a wide assortment of people. He was shipwrecked, jailed, he traveled all over to countries on the rim of the Mediterranean Sea. Sometimes he didn’t know exactly where he would be going or why or who he was supposed to meet when he got ...
... use, like the 3-in-1 Laser Pointer, Stylus, and Ball point pen he saw advertised. This 3-in-1 pen allows you to work faster and easier, according to the ads. You can enter your data into your PDA with the stylus, then rotate the top and sign a contact with the Ball point pen. When your work is all done you can use the laser to torment your dog. Then there’s the 3-in-1 Cooler, Fan and Ionic Air Purifier by Whirl Wind-Air. It will cool your air through a water sprinkling system, while at the ...
... all the laws of ritual purity and cleanliness provided for in the holiness code, meant instantaneous defilement. One reason tax collectors were so flauntily outcast and ostentatiously ostracized was because their profession required them to be in constant physical contact with the Gentile Roman rulers. By virtue of their profession, they lived in a continual state of ritual defilement. For first century observant Jews, there were clear “outsiders” and “insiders. The “wrong side of the tracks” were ...
... outside the familial circle of traditional Judaism. Second, and somewhat more subtly, this Samaritan traveler is obviously well-off, “rich” even. He is traveling with means. He has supplies, a ride, cash-on-hand. He knows where to stay and who to contact. Yet this well-heeled Samaritan is the hero of Jesus’ story. In his riveting tale of the “rich man and Lazarus” (Luke 16;19-31), Jesus elevates a disgustingly diseased, poor, wretched individual above the status of an honored, revered, rich man ...