... we go when we die, Gramps?" All Crankshaft answers is, "Away." "How far away?" "Depends ..." "On what?" "Lots of things." The grandson replies, "Thanks, Gramps ..." "No problem." Too bad the comic sketcher didn't talk about the cross he drew sticking out of the mound of dirt! I guess it wouldn't make a good comic strip to show the cross as the bar across the door of hell. "Sorry, Jesus closed hell." Now the grave is the open door to heaven! Death Is A Disgrace -- If That's All There Is! Death is a disgrace ...
... or bad depending on what is in your heart. You can't hide your real motive and you can't bamboozle God. So we can just be honest. And that's good, especially when we really are stumped and must step out with what we think is the best decision. Guess what? You can't go wrong if your heart is right. God sees it and he will turn even a less-than-perfect decision into good because he knows you were seeking him. "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance ...
... got included in our Bible. We don't know much about this prophet. There is very little in his writing that gives us solid clues as to the exact time of his ministry, and he is not mentioned outside of his own writings. The best scholarly guess is that Joel prophesied in Judah during the reign of King Uzziah (792-740 B.C.). These were days of great prosperity and national success. Uzziah expanded his territory and seized control of the caravan routes in the area. He improved fortifications in the kingdom and ...
... if they're mad at us -- pagans, although the word Gentiles seems to be a little less hostile. Actually, in their parlance, I'm probably considered a God-fearer. That's someone who not only respects their religious practices, but even is attracted to their faith. And I guess I am. Like I said, Judaism has some things that seem to make a lot of sense. They have a real respect for family, a little like we used to have in Rome, before all this empire stuff got started. "Now, the politicians back home are using ...
... , and instead, we remember the visit by the woman who anointed the feet of Jesus with her tears and her perfume. If anything, we remember Simon for his lack of courtesy and wisdom by treating the Son of God so shabbily when Jesus was a guest in his home. I guess that should remind us to be gracious to all our guests because you never know who is going to be a guest that will be remembered. But it is more than that. We see and hear the smug words of someone who assumed he had it made in the world ...
... Jesus' return? PREACHER: Wait? There's no time to wait! I have things to do, people to see. There are many who don't yet know about the mountaintop. Someone has to tell them. And that someone should be me. (He jumps up and rushes out.) 3RD WOMAN: Well, I guess he's decided to panic. I was going to tell him that Jesus will be able to find us at home as well as on the mountaintop, but he didn't give me a chance. At least I think that's true. I'd hate to be wrong. (To audience ...
... king for them. They wanted someone who would be set apart and above them as royalty. They wanted a king who would sit over them to rule in strength. One who would lead in making their nation great. And the name of that nation, as you have probably guessed, was Israel. Finally, after they had begged and begged for it, Yahweh allowed Israel to have a king. Over time, they had a long line of kings. However, the kings were a surprise to the people -- not a pleasant surprise. The people of Israel, for their part ...
... I could talk to you. I hope it's okay for me to be calling you like this, Frank, I just don't know what's happening. Why would God let something like this happen? What is God doing?" There was another pause while Ted tried to collect himself. "I guess I've changed my mind about reading the Bible with you. If you could come over for a little bit, I'd sure appreciate it. We couldn't get a flight until tomorrow morning, so I'll be at home all night. If you can, please bring your Bible and ...
... , Sam and Joe each discover that there is far more going on than they had realized. The end. That's the story. What did you think? Was it as bad as I led you to expect, or did it actually seem like a fairly nice story to you? I would guess that for many people it probably sounded simply like a story about some pretty nice, fairly generous, "church-going" people. If you had a hard time figuring out what was so non-Christian and so un-American about it, allow me to let you in on the secret. You see ...
... and girls. I'm going to show you something that no human being has ever seen before! Can you believe that? I have something in my hand that no one in this place has ever laid eyes on, and yet it is a very simple thing. Any guesses this morning? (Responses will be wild, maybe funny. Go on with it as long as you feel comfortable. Respond positively to reasonable suggestions.) Well, if you're ready, here it is! (Produce a nice plump peanut. Surprise and maybe a little disappointment will be registered.) Oh ...
... one day started to run until he dropped. He ran and ran and ran and ran, and, while he got exhausted, he didn't "drop." So he decided he'd do it again the next day, but this time he absolutely wouldn't stop until he dropped. Perhaps you can guess the end of the story. The man ran and ran, pushing himself to his limit instead of pampering himself in an armchair popping pills, and his body became strong and the man had a new life. There is some truth in the story both for an individual and for Christ ...
... song about these men. Who knows the name of the song? (Response -- "We Three Kings.") The three men were known as Magi. They were followers of a man named Zoroaster, and they were astronomers. Can you tell me what an astronomer is? (Response -- You may get some guesses but someone will say it's someone who studies the stars.) These men were wise. They not only studied the stars, they also studied the writings of the prophets. They knew that a new leader was to be born to Israel, and they wanted to come and ...
... little sad at times because he was poor and crippled. One day he and his mother had some very strange visitors. Three men, wearing crowns and beautiful jewels and robes, knocked on their door, asking to spend the night. Who do you suppose they were? (Let them guess.) Yes, they were the three kings on their way to see the Christ Child! They showed Amahl and his mother the lovely gifts that they had for this child -- the gold, incense and myrrh. They also told them all about this wonderful child who would do ...
... of battle or pulled someone from a fiery car. To be sure, doctors, nurses and EMTs can tell stories of saving lives. For them, lifesaving is part of their daily routine. The rest of us, though, ordinarily do not see ourselves in that role. My guess, however, is that most of us do more lifesaving than we think. Educators do it. Sunday school teachers do it. Professional counselors do it. Parents do it. Coaches and good friends do it. Any time we exert any kind of influence that enhances life rather than ...
... ? (Responses -- prior generations, grandparents, apostles, disciples, people who have lived before us, founders of our nation, and so forth.) Well, I'm thinking this morning of a particular group of people who came to America in a little ship. Anybody want to have a guess? Yes, they were the Pilgrims! And who can tell me the name of their ship and where they landed? (Mayflower -- Plymouth.) Have any of you ever been to Plymouth and gone aboard the Mayflower II which sailed here from England in 1970 to mark ...
There is one question that pastors get asked more often than any other, especially at this time of year. Can you guess what it is? "If God loves us so much, why does he allow suffering?" Sometimes it's a personal question: "Why am I having to suffer so much?" or "Why is the person I love so much having to suffer like this?" Sometimes, after a disaster, it's more general: " ...
... but not knowing how. Her appetite diminished. Her sleep patterns became erratic. Finally she phoned. As we conversed, an insight surfaced from within the young woman's soul. It came quickly, much as one flips a switch and light floods a formerly darkened room. "I guess there is a difference between sadness and worry, isn't there?" she postulated. "If I can fix something, then it's worth worrying about. If I can't do anything to change a situation, then I ought to just feel sad but not worried." It seemed ...
... who love God, who are called according to his purpose. Good morning, boys and girls. Do you know what this is? (Hold up wedding ring.) That's right. This is a ring -- a very special kind of ring. What kind of ring do you think this is? (Let them guess.) This is a wedding ring. Why is a wedding ring so special, boys and girls? (Let them answer.) That's right. A wedding ring says that this person is very important to someone else. One person has chosen another to be a wife or husband. That means that these ...
... about our relationship with him. He said, “Apart from me you can do nothing.” He said, “If we remain with him and he with us then we will learn so much and have rich and full lives.” If it wasn’t for Jesus none of us would make it. I guess you could say that we are his children and we will always need him. There is so much that we need to learn from him: how to talk to one another; how to forgive one another; and how to serve one another. Actually if it wasn’t for God not ...
Object: A big plate of chocolate chip cookies Ä one for each child Good morning, boys and girls. Look at what I brought with me today. Can you guess what these are? (Let them answer.) Right. These are chocolate chip cookies. They are my very favorite kind of cookies. Do you like them, too? (Let them answer.) Once I start eating these cookies I just can't seem to stop. One time I ate about twenty of them, one ...
... .) Sometimes it is fun, but sometimes you have to do really hard things, and then it isn't fun at all. Well, there is one kind of initiation that we have all been through and it was a wonderful one. Does anyone know what that was? (Let them guess.) We were all initiated as members of the church. Our initiation -- our test -- was our baptism. When the minister put water on our heads and prayed over us, then we became members of this very special group of people called Christians. We didn't have to sign our ...
... you gifts. JOSEPH: Gifts? 2ND SHEP: They're not much, but we want to share with you the little we have. JOSEPH: We don't need any gifts. MARY: Hush, Joseph! Of course we do. 3RD SHEP: We know how much extra one needs with a new baby and we guessed you wouldn't have been able to bring much with you. MARY: That's right, we weren't. 1ST SHEP: (Offering the bundle) So we brought some clothes for the baby -- clean cloths to use for diapers and some warm little jackets. 2ND SHEP: And outside we have left a ...
... of the security guards got a large ice cream cone for the boy, so when his parents arrived at the office, there was their little son happily eating his ice cream. Suddenly, as his parents embraced him, the child burst into tears. One of the security guards said, "Gosh, I guess he didn't know he was lost until he was found!" Jesus once met a man named Zacchaeus who was like that. Zacchaeus was a Jew but he worked for the Romans as a tax collector, and he was about as popular as folks today who work for the ...
... famous book is this? (Hold up Bible. Let them respond.) Yes, this is a copy of the Bible. We use this book from which to read our lessons each Sunday, don't we, boys and girls? Does anyone know when the Bible is used for something besides reading? (Let them guess.) Well, the Bible is used in a court of law. If you ever have to go to court to be a witness in somebody's trial, you will have to put your hand on this book and swear that you are telling the truth in everything you say. Telling the ...
... to change it to, "He said He was the King of theJews." I merely responded, "What I have written, I have written."It was my way of getting back at them. I thought that I would not have to hear about this Jesusfellow ever again after that day. I guess I was not surprisedwhen they wanted His tomb guarded for fear that His body would betaken and now the Christians claim that He has risen from thedead. "Jesus did rise from the dead," the Christians are saying."Jesus is not only the king of the Jews, but of all ...