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Life consists not in holding good cards, but in playing those you do hold well.
Josh Billings
Love looks through a telescope; envy through a microscope.
Josh Billings
Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it.
Josh Billings
Men mourn for what they have lost; women for what they ain't got.
Josh Billings
Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail.
Josh Billings
Most men would rather be charged with malice than with making a blunder.
Josh Billings
Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors.
Josh Billings
My advice to those who are about to begin, in earnest, the journey of life, is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other.
Josh Billings
Nature never makes any blunders; when she makes a fool she means it.
Josh Billings
One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness; a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs.
Josh Billings
One of the rarest things that a man ever does, is to do the best he can.
Josh Billings
The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
Josh Billings
The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.
Josh Billings
The happiest time in any man's life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.
Josh Billings
The man whose only pleasure in life is making money, weighs less on the moral scale than an angleworm.
Josh Billings
The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear.
Josh Billings
The trouble ain't that people are ignorant: it's that they know so much that ain't so.
Josh Billings
The truly innocent are those who not only are guiltless themselves, but who think others are.
Josh Billings
The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.
Josh Billings
There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory.
Josh Billings
There are people who are always anticipating trouble, and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen.
Josh Billings
There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying.
Josh Billings
There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won't.
Josh Billings
There is no greater evidence of superior intelligence than to be surprised at nothing.
Josh Billings
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