An elderly lady entered a pet store hoping to purchase a parrot. The store manager did have a parrot but he warned the little lady about purchasing this particular parrot. For you see, this parrot had been raised by a sailor and had picked up much of the sailor's strong language. Confident she could rehabilitate the parrot, though, the elderly lady purchased it. Upon arriving at its new home and being placed in a wonderful new cage, the parrot began an unbelievable barrage of shocking words. Immediately, ...
Thirty years ago, in 1964, State Senator Bobby Rowan of Georgia rose to his feet to make a motion before the state assembly. "Mr. President," Senator Rowan began, "I move that the proposed Georgia election code be amended as follows: No person may vote, either in the Democratic primary or in the general election in the State of Georgia, who has been deceased more than three years." The amendment was completely serious. A lively debate followed. On the floor of the state senate legislators argued over the ...
Sometime back a young family left for West Africa. Lee and Becky Prior and their three small children packed up and moved to the Ivory Coast. A carpenter and a homemaker, Lee and Becky have joined a group called the New Tribes Mission. Their task is to translate the Bible into the language of the multiple African tribes who have yet to know the story of Jesus ” to bring them the Gospel. They had made a decision to be missionaries for Christ. They had heard his call first to come to him and receive his love ...
Garbage truck driver Craig Randall sometimes brings his work home with him. There was that old-fashioned sewing machine he salvaged. There were some books he lifted from the trash. And then there was that Wendy's soft-drink cup that just happened to be worth $200,000. Neither Randall nor his fiancee believed it until Randall drove his garbage truck to a Wendy's restaurant and picked up his check. "I will probably still tell him not to bring stuff home from the trash," said his fiancee, Michelle Dacey, 25. ...
The movie, The Bridge on the River Kwai, chronicles the work of a group of soldiers, imprisoned by the Japanese during the Second World War. These soldiers were forced to build a railway across a very difficult section of mountains between Burma and Siam. Eric Lomax, a British soldier, is a reallife survivor of that group of prisoners. Throughout his imprisonment, Eric and thousands of other British soldiers were starved and tortured, and many died. When the Japanese officers suspected Eric of having a ...
What a story! This is the strangest story Jesus ever told! At least it's the strangest one we have in the Bible! There are some other rather strange stories that appear in collections like the Gospel of Thomas. But they didn't make it into the Bible! Think about it! If we're reading this thing correctly, Jesus is telling us to imitate a crook! A downright scoundrel! He cheats on his employer. He lies to his business associates. And yet, says Jesus, here's somebody from whom we need to learn! How could he ...
Back in 1985, William R. Greer performed an in-depth chemical analysis of the human body and its mineral properties. His conclusions were published in the International Herald Tribune and The New York Times. Greer claimed that the average human body contained 5 pounds of calcium, 9 ounces of potassium, 1 and 1/2 pounds of phosphorus, 6 ounces of sodium, 6 ounces of sulfur, 1 ounce of magnesium, and trace amounts of iron, iodine, and copper. According to a professor at the Illinois Medical School, the total ...
A small boy had been told that he must always wait patiently till he was served at meals, and not draw attention to himself. One day he was eating at a friend's house with his mother, and somehow he was accidentally overlooked. Nobody noticed, and for a time he was patient, but at last he could stand it no longer. Leaning across to his mother, he said in an audible whisper: "Mother, do little boys who starve to death go to heaven?" That little fellow was more patient than most of us. I read recently that ...
Faye Neff, writing in THE CLERGY JOURNAL, tells about a newspaper in Maine that printed an embarrassing mistake. The paper ran a photo of the local board of council members, but someone placed the wrong caption under the picture. Beneath the photo were these words: "Naive and vulnerable, the sheep huddle for security against the uncertainties of the outside world." Can't you just imagine that caption, asks Neff, under a variety of photographs? Under a picture of the president and his advisers? Or perhaps ...
Somebody ought to write a book titled, "Preachers Are Funny Creatures." It makes no difference if they are pastors, priests or rabbis--people who have the wonderful privilege as I do of standing in a pulpit each week are somewhat weird. Like the Reverend Eugene Magee. Magee is an enthusiastic pastor who does not wear a robe. His sanctuary is plainer than most, adorned only by a cross and an American flag. Magee likes to wave his arms to emphasize important points in his sermons. Unfortunately, he is so ...
Have you ever noticed that some people are morning people and some people are not? Veteran journalist Bob Schieffer replaced Dan Rather as anchor of the CBS evening news. In a recent book, Schieffer recalls an embarrassing moment from his early years as a television news reporter. He had worked through the night covering a brutal hurricane that was battering the Texas coastline. He got back to the news desk in time to make his broadcast for the six a.m. news. But exhaustion soon set in, and Schieffer fell ...
We continue on our journey today as we examine and reflect on "The Sixth Word" of our Lord Jesus Christ from the cross. So far, we have heard our Lord from the cross share these words: "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." He shares with a repentant thief the promise, "Today you will be with me in Paradise." We saw Jesus commit the care of His mother, Mary, to his closest friend John. Then we heard that powerful cry from the cross, "My God, My God, why hast thou forsaken Me?" Then, the ...
There is a story about a first year theological student who was given to napping in her Basic Theology Class. Over a period of time the professor took notice of it and was somewhat angry. One day he noticed her falling off to sleep and decided that he would catch her in the act of taking a snooze. The professor had the habit of asking questions off the top of his head during class sessions. One afternoon the professor asked the question, "Why does God permit hardships, troubles and adversity in our ...
Over the last two weeks we've looked at the first chapter of James and discussed the author''s instructions on Triumphing Over Troubles and Tripping Up the Tempter. Today we continue in our examination of the book of James with verses 5-11 in Chapter one--learning how to Track the Truth and Trust it. James bases his instruction on the realization that the average person tends to turn to God as a last resource in trying to discern truth, rather than at the beginning of the process. He writes in verse 5, "If ...
During World War II allied armies marched into Germany on their way to Berlin. Retreating German soldiers switched road signs and destroyed landmarks in an effort to confuse their enemy. And, to an extent, it worked, for many a G.I. followed a false marker only to end up in the wrong place. That just goes to show the need for landmarks, the importance of reliable signposts by which to steer. Here locally, landmarks like the courthouse, the river, the college, or the bridge are important in helping us find ...
Listen to this passage from an autobiography: "It was on a Thursday, the day before payday in the black community. The teacher was asking each student how much his father would give to the Community Chest. On Friday night, each kid would get the money from his father, and on Monday, he would bring it to school. I decided I was going to buy me a Daddy right then. I had money in my pocket from shining shoes and selling papers, and whatever Helene Tucker pledged for her Daddy I was going to top it. And I'd ...
A priest found a branch of a thorn tree twisted around so that it resembled a crown of thorns. Thinking it a symbol of the crucifixion, he placed it on the altar in his chapel on Good Friday. Early on Easter morning he remembered what he had done. Feeling it was not appropriate for Easter Sunday, he hurried into the church to clear it away before the congregation came. But when he went into the church, he found the thorn branches blossoming with beautiful roses. Welcome to this celebration of Easter Day. ...
Call To Worship The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness ...
I have heard people talk about the power of laughter to heal. I came across it first in a book written by Norman Cousins some years ago called, Anatomy of an Illness. It was a story of his own debilitating illness, and how he conquered it with laughter. It seems that he was overseas at a meeting, and felt a fever coming on. In no time at all he found himself in the hospital, his situation diagnosed as a degenerative arthritic condition. The prognosis was not good. At best, he would have life-long paralysis ...
When our children were small, a nice church lady named Chris made them a child-friendly creche. All the actors in this stable drama are soft and squishy and durable - perfect to touch and rearrange - or toss across the living room in a fit of toddler frenzy. The Joseph character has always been my favorite because he looks a little wild - red yarn spiking out from his head, giving him an odd look of energy. In fact, I have renamed this character John the Baptist and in my mind substituted one of the ...
For almost fifty years I have lived comfortably within the church. And for almost fifty years I have loved the church. I still remember sitting in the pew, a small child of three or four - dwarfed by big shoulders embracing me on every side. I loved the music - the grand soaring chords of the organ. I loved the windows and the colors, the flowers and soft cushions. I loved the warm, full voice of the preacher and I loved the hushed silence - a silence that made me feel like I was part of something special ...
Both Elizabeth and I hail from paper-mill towns. A few years ago the blue collar-redneck-good-old-boy logging town Elizabeth grew up in (Springfield, Oregon) found itself very interested all of a sudden in building sushi bars and trendy, high-tech fitness centers. Why? Sony Corporation seriously considered the town as a new factory headquarters site. Like every other economically struggling small town, the prospect of a large employer coming to town with deep pockets and wide wants encouraged the community ...
Any of your homes the result of a mixed marriage? Ours is. You know. Southern boy/Western girl. It is a cultural divide that is sometimes as deep and wide as the Grand Canyon itself--an appropriate metaphor since that particular geological formation is located in the south, but is also in the west. Yet while many distinctions of southern life have been unaccountably rejected by the western influence--cheese grits, sweet tea, even southern gospel music! Everyone in our household can agree on the benefit of ...
One of my favorite musical forms is the spiritual. For as long as I can remember, one of my favorite spirituals has been “Sweet Little Jesus Boy.” I don’t know why, exactly. I like the melody. I like some of the images it calls to mind. It stirs up some deep feelings within me. I don’t know, I just like it. But recently, some of the words have been troubling me. All throughout the song there is the recurring phrase, “We didn’t know who you was,” or, “We didn’t know ‘twas you.” One typical verse says, “The ...
A couple of weeks ago, the Brookwood Community celebrated its 20th Anniversary out at Brookshire, Texas. Brookwood is an amazing place… a modern-day miracle! It’s a God-centered educational, residential and entrepreneurial village for adults with functional disabilities. It’s a God-centered, educational, residential and entrepreneurial village for adults with functional disabilities. It’s a special place for special adults. It enables them to grow and contribute and belong and be productive. It gives them ...