If we took a poll of the most boring places on earth, a significant number of votes would probably go to doctors' offices. But it was in a boring doctor's office that Robert Fulghum was surprised, and even reminded of God. Fulghum had been under the weather for a while, so on a bleak February day he went to the doctor. As he sat in the waiting room, he noticed an attractive elderly couple waiting, too. The woman wore holly berries and poinsettia leaves in her hair. The man leaned toward Fulghum, smiled, ...
There is a ridiculous old story about a fisherman who was enormously successful. Each morning he would take his small boat out on the lake and within a few hours he would return with a boat loaded with fish. People wondered, how did he do it? One day a stranger showed up and asked the man if he could go along the next time the man went out fishing. The man said, "Sure. Meet me here tomorrow morning at 5:00 and we will go out." The next morning the two of them made their way through the early morning mist ...
There is a ridiculous story about a group of animals in the jungle who decided to have a football game. The problem was that no one could tackle the rhinoceros. Once he got a head of steam, he was unstoppable. When he received the opening kickoff, he rambled for a touchdown. The score was seven to nothing immediately. Somehow, they managed to keep the ball away from him the remainder of the first quarter. At the beginning of the second quarter, the other team tied the score 7 to 7. The lion tried to warn ...
Jesus was a master psychologist. He knew that all of us crave recognition. He knew that the desire for status is an innate part of the human condition. Most of us don’t want to simply keep up with the Jones we want to be slightly ahead of the Jones, the Smiths and everyone else on the block. There is a popular joke about a fellow named Pat who always wanted a telephone in his car. Finally he got one. He couldn’t wait to tell his best friend Mike. Mike was green with envy. That very day he ordered a ...
May I ask you a question? Who are you? It sounds like a simple question requiring a simple answer, but it really isn't. For example, you might say, "I'm Fred Smith." And I might say, "No, that's your name. Who are you, really?" You might reply, "Oh, I'm a bank manager." "No," I would say, "that's what you do." "I'm an American," you might declare. "That's where you live." "I'm a [Baptist]," you might retort. "That's your denominational preference." You could also give your height and your weight and say ...
Can you picture this scene? We are sitting on bleachers under the big top having a wonderful time laughing at the clowns, watching lions and tigers jump at the crack of a whip, and gazing in awe as the acrobats perform. We are caught up in the excitement of the circus and join in with the crowd in thunderous applause after each act. The acrobats perform high above us in what seems to us as death-defying feats. Each feat seems greater than the previous one. "Ahhs" can be heard in unison after each act. ...
Sue Monk Kidd was telling the story of Jonah to her six-year-old vacation Bible school class, and the children fell into a discussion about how they would manage to escape if swallowed like Jonah. "I'd start a fire in the whale's stomach, and he'd cough me out!" declared one fellow, no doubt remembering the scene from Pinocchio. "I'd stomp on his tongue till he spit me out," said another. The suggestions grew wilder by the minute. Suddenly, a thoughtful little girl spoke up: "I'd call my daddy and wait ...
I wonder if there is anyone here this morning who gets nervous flying? Maybe you agree with George S. Kaufman who once said, "I like terra firma ” the more firma, the less terra." The premier science-fiction writer Ray Bradbury of Los Angeles won a top award in 1968 from the Aviation/Space Writers Association for a Life magazine article he wrote in praise of space exploration. But Bradbury didn't attend the association's awards meeting in Florida. He won't fly. (1) Time magazine reported sometime back on ...
Some of you may be campers. Summertime means adventures in the great outdoors. One thing I've discovered is that camping isn't for everyone. Reed Glenn of the Daily Camera in Boulder, Colorado compiled a list of comments received by the US Forest Service from back packers and campers: "Too many bugs and leeches and spiders," wrote one unhappy camper. "Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests." Another wrote, "A McDonald's would be nice at trail head." And one more adventurer wrote, "The ...
Two men, walking through the woods, come across a big deep hole. "Wow . . . that looks deep," says one. "Sure does," says the other. "Toss a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is." They pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait . . . no noise. "Hey, that is REALLY deep," says the first man. "Here, throw one of these great big rocks down there. That should make a noise." They pick up a couple of football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and wait . . . and wait. Nothing. They look at each ...
An Upbeat Word for a Downbeat World, #3 (Alternate) Mark Twain was a writer of great charm and wit, Twain could communicate important insights in a way that won him many admirers. He was welcome in the highest social and literary circles both in this country and abroad. On one of his trips abroad the Emperor of Germany sent an invitation for him to come to the palace to dine with the royal family. When Twain's little daughter heard about it, she exclaimed, "Daddy, you know most everybody in the whole world ...
As most of you know, I don't always preach a thematic sermon for special secular holidays such as the Fourth of July Sunday, Memorial Day, Mother's or Father's Day. It's also rare that I preach a sermon on a single theme, such as racism, war, abortion, pornography, poverty. But, hopefully, my sermons address all these pressing issues in the context of Scripture, as that scripture presents itself in the order of my preaching. For you who wonder about that approach to preaching and the fact that we don't ...
As most of you know, I don't always preach a thematic sermon for special secular holidays such as the Fourth of July Sunday, Memorial Day, Mother's or Father's Day. It's also rare that I preach a sermon on a single theme, such as racism, war, abortion, pornography, poverty. But, hopefully, my sermons address all these pressing issues in the context of Scripture, as that scripture presents itself in the order of my preaching. For you who wonder about that approach to preaching and the fact that we don't ...
Dr. Nels Ferre was one of the imminent theologians a generation ago -- a professor at Vanderbilt. As an old man, he stood before his students and talked about his coming to America. He was one of eight children living in Sweden. With the war coming ever closer, his mother chose him to leave the country. She took the family down to the great cathedral in the middle of the city and, having the children stand in a circle, encouraged them to pray together for each other, but especially for Nels. He still ...
With this fourth Sunday in Advent, we have arrived at the dawn of another Christmas Eve. It is almost mind boggling to realize that we stand at the beginning of the third millennium since the good news of God's blessing the world through the Christ child was proclaimed. Yet, the words of the angel Gabriel, Elizabeth and Mary continue to stir the hearts of Christian people around the world today as they have for countless generations. Though ancient, these words come to us with the newness of a fresh ...
I spent last Sunday and Monday with my father down in Perry County, Mississippi. He’s 90 years old. It was not a planned visit. His left leg went dead on him -- that’s the way he put it -- his leg went dead on him. The doctors said it was a blood clot. The arteries were too hardened to deal with the clot through surgery and they were afraid they would have to amputate the leg. Thankfully, that has not been the case and we are grateful. Being there with him brought back powerful memories of my mother. She ...
Edward DeBono is a man who travels all over the world, giving seminars on how to think. He teaches what he calls “lateral thinking,” and he illustrates what he means by that from an experience early in his life. Some thirty years ago he was a Rhodes Scholar at Oxford. One night he attended a party in London. The party lasted late, and he got back to Oxford after the gates were closed. Traditionally in that college the gates were locked at twenty minutes past midnight. So, in order to get to his room, he ...
Our father of the Methodist movement, John Wesley, had an attention-getting way of expressing truth. Though he was very wordy in his sermons, he could gather up a world of truth in a few words. His pithy sayings are often quoted and are a source of truth and inspiration. Listen to him: “Earn all you can, save all you can, give all you can.” The best way to resist the devil is to destroy whatever of the world remains in us. Every new victory a soul gains comes as a result of prayer. The essential part of ...
Bob Hope died in 2003 at age 100. Before Bob died, his wife Dolores asked him where he wanted to be buried. And Bob, in his usual comedic style, answered, "Surprise me!" One night when Bob was in his prime he reported his activity for the day. "Today," he said, "my heart beat 103,369 times. My blood traveled 168 miles. I breathed 23,040 times. I inhaled 438 cubic feet of air. I ate three and a quarter pounds of food and drank two pounds of liquid. I perspired one and a half pints. I gave off 85 degrees of ...
Some of you may have read a remarkable short story sometime during your school years by D. H. Lawrence titled, “The Rocking‑Horse Winner.” I wonder if you remember how the story begins? It is a haunting tale about a family living above its means. The mother is considered by friends and neighbors to be the perfect mother, in spite of the fact that deep down she knows she has difficulty loving her three children. It’s important to the husband to keep up the pretense of success--the large house, staffed with ...
I understand there is an organization in Colorado called, "Dare to Be Dull." I am not a joiner, but I think I may have found my people. Their mission statement reads, "We try to reach out to all other people out there who actually like jell-o and washing their own cars, but have been afraid to admit it." Actually I don't like jell-o. And I hate to wash my car. So I may be a wilder, crazier guy than I thought. But on the other hand, I leave a meeting, somebody leaves with me, and comments, "That was the ...
For nine months now people have been asking me how I liked my trip to Germany, and for nine months I have been telling them I haven't gone yet. Last summer you all graciously gave Jean and me a trip to Germany in commemoration of my twenty years as one of your ministers. Actually, it has taken us nine months to get packed. Anyway, we are leaving tomorrow morning and will be tourists in Germany for two weeks. Anticipating the trip I was reminded of an incident that happened several years ago when I ran into ...
I love that story read to us this morning as our epistle lesson from the Acts of the Apostles, telling of Paul's visit to Ephesus. The first people that he happens to run into are Christians. He asks them, "Did you receive the Holy Spirit?" They said, "We never even heard of the Holy Spirit." Paul must have slapped his forehead in despair, saying, "Do I have to do everything myself to get it right." Then he asks, "What about when you were baptized?" Which is the clue that in the early Church, receiving the ...
Joshua 24:1-3a, 14-25, 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18, Matthew 25:1-13
Sermon Aid
John R. Brokhoff
COMMENTARY Old Testament: Joshua 24:1-3a, 14-25 Joshua leads the people to renew the covenant. When Joshua took over the leadership, he called the people together before crossing the Jordan. At the end of his term, he again calls them together and calls upon them to get rid of pagan gods and serve Yahweh. The people swear they will serve only the Lord. Thereupon, the Mosaic covenant was renewed. Old Testament: Amos 5:18-24 Prepare for the day of the Lord by exceeding justice. Epistle: 1 Thessalonians 4:13- ...
A few years ago there was a hot slogan aimed at kids who found themselves facing the temptations of drugs, alcohol, sex, peer pressure of all kinds. "Just Say No!" Easier said than done . . . as anyone who has longed to fit in, be popular, or just avoid making a scene can tell you. Sometimes to just say no is the hardest thing there is to say. It's so much easier to go along to get along, to blend in with the crowd, to avoid that super-sensitive social radar that picks-up and picks-on anyone who is ...