... as a seminarian with a group of junior highs in a Congregational church in Newton, Massachusetts, that I began to receive the answer to that all-important question. Those adolescents painfully reminded me of myself - with my restless energy, my peripatetic mind, my mercurial sense of self-esteem, my desire to be good and to see good and to do good in the world. What was I looking for? I was looking for a balanced life - where truth and passion could give voice to the God in me and the God in others - where ...
... architecture. So they commissioned 300 artists to design unique cows, and placed these "artworks" in various architectural locations throughout the city. At the end of the year they auctioned off the 300 "original" cows. The result? A tourist bonanza and a shot of self esteem into the citizenry of Chicago. The plastering of this image of the cow (by the way, they're still slaughtering Bulls in Chicago) all over the city had the exact reverse effect of what Cincinnati predicted when years ago it laughed out ...
328. Missing the Point
John 10:1-21
Illustration
Steve Jackson
... column, Dear Abby, would run a list of church bulletin misprints and church sign bloopers that prove that we in the church occasionally have problems saying what we mean. Here were some of them: The bulletin of a church in Iowa announced: The Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday from 7 to 8:30p.m. Please use the back door. Another church's bulletin carried this announcement: Due to the Pastor's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice. During a service one ...
... inoculates individuals against a host of social problems, including suicide, drug abuse, out-of-wedlock births, crime and divorce. Churchgoers...are not only happier than the unchurched, they are healthier by far, with lower rates of depression, higher self esteem and far less incidents of alcohol and drug abuse or crime. Frequent worshippers have longer, happier marriages than their less religious counterparts. Very religious women, it turns out, have better sex than agnostics. God, it seems, is even ...
... , p. 12. 3. Quoted in American Association Journal, (November/December 1991, 3. 4. Cited by Charles Colson, A Dance with Deception, p. 188. 5. Biography on Jeffery C. Fenholt, Jeffery Fenholt Outreach, Uplands, California. 6. Jeffery C. Fenholt, From Darkness to Light, (Tulsa, Oklahoma: Harrison House, 1994). 7. Robert Schuller, Self-Esteem: The New Reformation, (Waco: Word, 1982), 98ff. 8. The New Book of Christian Quotations, (West Chester, Ill.: Crossway, 1984), 226.
... , rules of behavior that you memorize and that rarely bend to encompass individual concerns and needs. Manners embrace socially acceptable behavior, of course, but also much more than that. They are an expression of how you treat others when you care about them, their self-esteem and their feelings. Manners are under your control, because they come from your heart. In a chaotic world, they can make order out of disorder and give you the power to bring pleasure into other people's lives.(4) In the absence of ...
332. Words of Encouragement
John 6:24-25
Illustration
Billy D. Strayhorn
Steven Morris was a special needs child in Mrs. Bernaducci's class. Steven was a thin African-American boy who was blind. His handicap negatively impacted his self-esteem. However, over a period of time, the teacher realized that Steven had exceptional hearing. One day she put the class mascot, a mouse, into the trash can. The scratching noise created a minor panic until Steven located the mouse. Mrs. Bernaducci exclaimed: "Steven, you are truly a wonder." The nickname ...
... unattractive, undesirable, or you may look at it as cheap, but to the potter, clay is more valuable than gold and more precious than diamonds. Don't let the fact that you are called clay in the Bible deflate your ego. If anything, it ought to inflate your self-esteem, because just as clay is valuable to the potter, that is how valuable you are to God. Have you ever thought about the fact that God created the world with His hands, but He created us with His heart? When God created the world He said, "That's ...
... , being immersed 3 times (once in the name of the Father, in the name of the Son, in the name of the Spirit). Toula and her brother Nick are talking. Toula's brother Nick turns to her and says, "It's not so bad, huh?" Toula, who has had some self-esteem issues, replies in horror, "Are you kidding? Any minute now he's going to look at me and go, 'Yeah, right. You're so not worth this.'" Nick says, "Yes you are." And that's exactly what God says to us. Not only the day we are baptized, but every ...
... came to find the lost children of Israel. But she, with a lot of need and even more faith responded “Yes, but even the dogs under the table eat the children's crumbs." Jesus said, “Go, your daughter is healed." I'm not trying to crush anybody's self-esteem. I'm just saying, with God, there's more than enough, more than enough love, more than enough food, more than enough grace, more than enough life, more than enough meaning to see you through. Even the crumbs under the Table are enough. O taste and see ...
... as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us, said the Psalmist. Forgiveness does not erase the facts, ignore the wrong, or excuse the pain. Forgiveness forges a new start. It is a gift of grace that restores our self-esteem, cancels a debt, and sets us free to be all that we were created to be. Forgiveness fits faulty people. I recommend it. The Blood of Jesus Christ cleanses us from all unrighteousness. The gory thought of animal sacrifices so massive that the blood of ...
... 't thinking that at all," confessed the wife. “I was thinking that if I had married him, he'd be a Fortune 500 CEO and you would be a service station attendant." Humility comes from the root humus. It means “down to earth." Humility is not low self-esteem, it is not doormat existence, it is not personal punishment, it is not living in a sense of guilt. Humility is keeping your feet on the ground and your mind on Christ. We come to Holy Week as humble people. Peter Marshall once said, “Lord, when we ...
... the president, “I’d just miss having you around.” Unfortunately, human worth in our society is carefully reserved for those who are winners. One of the beautiful things that has happened in parenting; and the resources that are available for parents, is an emphasis on self-esteem. Parents need to learn how to value a child, not in terms of the child’s performance but to value the child for who the child is. We’re being taught, in parenting, not to say to a child, “bad, bad boy,” or “good ...
... to give the impoverished and others in need too much. Not only will it result in less wealth, but the less wealthy I am, the less successful I will seem to be or feel. How can we get out of this mess? Botton contends that because self-esteem is a matter of both success and pretensions (or expectations), what needs to happen when you experience status anxiety is to change your expectations. In this instance, we need to challenge our society's expectations that you really are not somebody unless you have a ...
... , to have a god is nothing else than to trust and believe in that one with your whole heart."2 All of us have a god. But far too often, what we look to for refuge in need, what we trust, are the things of this world — wealth, status, job, self-esteem, friends, even family. Those things are too often our gods. Too often you and I illicitly shift the focus, get our priorities messed up. We make it all about ourselves, and not God. It's true. Too often we are not God-centered enough. I really like what Rick ...
... pleasure or engaging in some naughty indiscretion. As long as you don't get caught, it isn't a sin. Sin is being the victim of an unhealthy social environment created by poverty, poor education, or neglectful parenting. Sin is the result of low self-esteem. A little determination here or moral instruction there (Give 'em the Ten Commandments!) can make everything right. For Paul, dealing with sin is not quite so easy. It is not even so easily explained. For Paul, sin is captivity to a power from which ...
... an article in a church journal about a church in Jackson, Tennessee that used music to help what are called at‑risk children. They used volunteer piano teachers who gave lessons to under‑privileged kids. The idea worked. Pride, self‑esteem, and academic performance among these kids from disadvantaged backgrounds were all enhanced. Not only that, but the program caught the attention of the Rockefeller Foundation for Fine Arts in New York. The foundation thought the program might be developed nationally ...
... a non-leper. Any time a person who was clean came near them, lepers were to stand off at a distance and shout, if they still had voices to shout with, "Unclean! Unclean!" Not the kind of regulation that was likely to do much for self esteem. As we might imagine, leprosy was dreaded not only for its disfiguring misery, but because it made people complete social outcasts. Lepers were excluded from the general population and from any contact with the people of God. Participation in the religious life of the ...
... of the man by the size of the thing that makes him mad." Certainly to boil up inside, to lose control because of some trivial personal hurt, to allow the wild forces of our being to run loose because our wills have been crossed or our self-esteem has been wounded, is not a mark of power. That, literally, is power converted into poison. Beethoven is thought to have brought on his own deafness by falling into a fit of anger. Psychologists tell us that the emotion of anger produces more immediate effects on ...
... Scout. It made Marilyn wonder: “Could there be a lovable child of God behind some of the ugly masks we wear? That woman with the stringy, unwashed hair who sat near [us] in church last week. Might there be a sweet-natured child with little self-esteem behind her unkempt disguise? That opinionated man who seems so cocky. Is it possible there’s a little boy behind his blustery camouflage, hoping his fear won’t show? The pushy woman crowding in front of [us] at the post office. I wonder if the little ...
346. The Life of a Pastor
Illustration
H. B. London, Jr.
... hazard to their family 75% reported a significant stress-related crisis at least once in their ministry 50% felt unable to meet the needs of the job 90% felt they were inadequately trained to cope with ministry demands 70% say they have a lower self-esteem now than when they started out 40% reported a serious conflict with a parishioner at least once a month 37% confessed having been involved in inappropriate sexual behavior with someone in the church 70% do not have someone they consider a close friend.
347. What Are You Proud Of?
Illustration
Dr. Dale E. Turner
... you believe in and you are proud of?" He never asked conventional questions such as "What do you do for a living?" It was always, "What have you done that you believe in and are proud of?" It was an unsettling question for people who had built their self-esteem on their wealth or their family name or their exalted job title. Not that the old man was a fierce interrogator. He was delighted by a woman who answered, "I'm doing a good job raising three children;" and by a cabinetmaker who said, "I believe in ...
348. 12-Step Nights
Humor Illustration
... . right after organic co-gardening . . ." The next frame catches him saying, "Also, a special treat Saturday night will be aerobic male-bonding night! So bring your sneakers! Any questions?" To this, a parishioner queries, "Yes, IS THERE A CHURCH SERVICE?" The pastor responds, "Canceled. There was a conflict with the self-esteem workshop."
349. Bad Hair Day
Humor Illustration
Ever have a "bad hair day?" According to a recent Yale University study, and reported in Emphasis (Nov/Dec 2001,p. 32) bad hair days are a cause of low self-esteem. The study found that on those days when the hair just wouldn't cooperate, people felt less smart, less capable, more embarrassed and less sociable. What was surprising to the researchers was that men, not women, were most likely to be affected by bad hair days. Bad hair days? Are ...
... to a party where there is much drinking. He takes only a few drinks, but then gets behind the wheel of an automobile. He has no intent of hurting anyone. He’s just having a good time. But then . . . The lonely housewife, suffering from low self-esteem, reaches out to a man who is not her husband. No big deal. It’s only a harmless flirtation. But then . . . The business man feels his corporation doesn’t appreciate his hard work. Also, he’s having more and more trouble keeping up with the lifestyles ...