If the church’s seating arrangement allows, have all the children of the pre-school through the sixth grade sit together on one side of the chancel, with the junior choir on the other side. As the program opens, the children of the pre-school through sixth grade face the congregation and sing Come and Hear the Grand Old Story. As they sing, the "family" characters enter and arrange themselves on the chancel or stage. The school children are seated, and the spotlight focuses on the chancel. A mother and ...
On January 3, 2004, the Mars rover named “Spirit” began its diligent exploration. It began sending back so many photographs that NASA figured out a way to teach the little rover how to detect changes in images, so that it sent only images back to Earth with new information. For example, if Rover was taking photographs of dust devils, it would pause and waits until the image changed before taking the next photo. That meant less work for the scientists sifting through the many, many amazing photographs ' ...
St. Paul's 40th Birthday. And some of you here in 1998 were here in 1958. Things are different now, of course. Churches change and neighborhoods change and even whole societies change. We know that WE change as we get older. I remember the days when it seemed that Christmas or a birthday would NEVER get here; and now I think, "Is it here again ALREADY?" You too? LOTS of things change with age. Not long ago, someone noted some of the more obvious adjustments.(1) It was entitled, "YOU'RE NOT A KID ANYMORE ...
I do it for all of you, so I guess I ought to do it for the church, right? Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday, Dear Chur-urch, Happy birthday to you. Amen. OK, let's do it up right. If this is the church's birthday, there ought to be a party, true? One would think that an observance of this magnitude would be noticed around town, just like Christmas or Easter. But this week I have had occasion to shop in several stores, and amazingly, not one of them indicated that there were so ...
Approaching 40, Bill yearned for a boat. Frugality won out until the day he came across the obituary of an old high-school classmate named Ted. Ted had been the same age as Bill and now he was dead. Bill was certain this was a sign that life was too short. So he went out and purchased a boat that very weekend. Days later, a former classmate called Bill. "Sure was a sad thing, wasn't it?" the classmate said. "You know, Ted's boating accident and all." (1) Experts tell us that the baby boom generation is ...
One of the questions men often ask men when they first meet is, "What do you do?" A smart aleck might answer by saying, "Oh, I snore," or "I mow my lawn once a week. Then I take a shower. Then I usually watch television an hour or so...." By then the other party is likely to intercede asking, "I mean, what do you do for a living?" This usually is a good ice breaker. Most of us are comfortable talking about our work. If things are going well it gives us a chance to boast a bit, tastefully, of course. If ...
(Fourth Sunday in Advent) There is a book titled BARREN COUPLES AND BROKEN HEARTS. It is about married couples who desperately want to have children but, for one reason or another, are unable. It is one of life's ironies, isn't it? Some couples have unexpected and even unwanted pregnancies. Other couples who are totally unfit to be parents also have no difficulty breeding. Then there are those couples with so much love to give but who are denied the opportunity. Of course, children are a challenge. I read ...
Some people have weird eating habits. But none weirder than Michel Lotito. Lotito ate everything. I mean EVERYTHING. In Amarillo, Texas, he ate a queen-sized bed. In Quebec he ate a whole bicycle. "The chain," he was quoted as saying, "was the tastiest part." In Marseilles he ate a car. A small car, true--a Renault, I think--but still a car. As James Dent once noted in his humorous book, James Dent Strikes Again, Lotito was not an overgrown termite. He was a human-type person born 1950 in Grenoble, France ...
When the historian H. G. Wells died in 1946, many of the newspapers reporting the event quoted the last words he ever spoke. Friends and nurses were fluttering about his bedside trying to be helpful, adjusting pillows, pulling up the covers, administering sedatives, and so on. Wells turned to them and said, "Don't bother me. Can't you see I'm busy dying." It was the last flicker of humor from a gallant spirit. I've been thinking about that lately...about the way people die. It says a lot about how they ...
The title of this sermon, "You Can't Win Them All," sounds like what Bruce Bochy might say in the locker room after each game the Padres play. At least the Padres aren't as bad as the 1962 Mets, who managed to lose 120 games that season. The last game of the season in 1962, Joe Pignatano hit a triple play to end the game. It was a wonderful ending for an infamous season of the Mets. Casey Stengel was the manager of the Mets that year. After that last game, he called the team together in the locker room, ...
One cold Sunday afternoon in December, the congregation of a little Baptist church went over to the nearby river where they did their baptizing. They had several persons who were to be baptized that afternoon. There was one man who had some reservations about all this, as he faced the icy-cold water. He was a new convert and all this was foreign to him. He was, therefore, last in line. He noticed that when the first person came up out of the water, she quoted a Bible verse: “Bless the Lord, O my soul.” ...
Being President of the SBC for one year has been both one of the greatest blessings, and one of the greatest burdens of my life. On the one hand, it has reminded me of just how blessed I am to be a Southern Baptist. Southern Baptists are not a perfect people, but they are a precious people. I don't believe there is a group of Bible believers anywhere in the world that love Jesus more than Southern Baptists. I sometimes feel like a lady who lived up in the mountains of North Carolina. She was a Baptist ...
The late Bishop Lance Webb used to tell a story about a little five-year-old boy who misbehaved. His mother decided to give him some quiet time. She had a large closet. So, she pushed back the hangers in the closet so there would be room for his chair. She turned on the light and told him he would have to stay in the closet for 30 minutes. She heard strange sounds inside the closet and then everything got quiet. The mother was curious, so she opened the door. “Jimmy, “she asked, “what on earth are you ...
It happened in a church parking lot, and my friend saw it happen. A lady, backing out of her parking space, rammed my friend's car, causing considerable damage. My friend was able to talk to the woman before she drove away. She was distraught and he was distraught. But, after exchanging the appropriate information, they departed to leave it in the hands of the insurance people. When it got into the hands of the insurance people, the no-fault insurance clause went into effect. Yes, the woman's insurance ...
I heard about a man recently in Minnesota who clearly needs to choose another profession. His name is Rafiq Abdul Mortland. Mortland had committed a string of robberies, and fortunately for him, he was eventually caught. I say fortunately, because during his crime spree, Mortland received the nickname, “The Rolaids Robber.” The reason he received this nickname was that, while he was robbing their store, he repeatedly asked store clerks for antacid tablets. Mortland needed the antacid because of the stress ...
Radio preacher and best-selling author Chuck Swindoll once spoke to a group of pastors. He told about a man who was mountain climbing in the Sierra Mountains of California. In one particularly difficult section of his climb, he pulled himself on to a ledge only to find a six‑foot timber rattlesnake looking at him with his mouth open and tail rattling. The man froze. The rattler struck. The man moved so that the snake’s fangs barely missed grazing his neck. Still, the snake’s fangs got caught in the man’s ...
A very dirty little boy came in from playing in the yard and asked his mother, "Who am I?" Ready to play the game she said, "I don't know! Who are you?" "WOW!" the boy cried. "Mrs. Johnson was right! She said I was so dirty, my own mother wouldn't recognize me!" (1) Just like our physical parents, God doesn't forget God's children. Sometimes, most of the time, God makes God's presence known through our physical parents. At least that's what happens in the passage for today. Today we look at one of the ...
In the movie, "With Honors," Joe Pesci plays Simon Wilder a homeless man slowly dying from asbestos poisoning. Brendan Fraser portrays Montgomery 'Monty' Kessler, who is a student at Harvard who has reluctantly befriended Simon. In one of their conversations Simon pulls out a leather pouch and says, "There it is. That's it, my life." He dumps a bunch of stones out in his hand, picks up one and says, "I got this one on a beach in Bali. Best night's sleep I ever had." Monty asks, "You remember one night of ...
Albert Einstein is noted for his work in the field of physics. That’s where he got his Nobel Prize in 1921. But one of his most famous quotes is one that appears to have nothing to do with physics. Einstein is reported to have said, when asked what is the most powerful force in the universe, “The most powerful force in the universe is compound interest.” What is “the secret of life?” When asked that question at a men’s retreat, “Mike,” a successful entrepreneur whose start-up company went public, making ...
A woman goes to her doctor. The doctor verifies that she is pregnant. This is her first pregnancy. The doctor asks her if she has any questions. She replies, “Well, I’m a little worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?” The doctor thinks for a moment then says, “Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, it’s difficult to describe pain.” “I know, but can’t you give me some idea?” she asks. “Well, he said, “Grab your upper lip and pull it out a little . . .” ...
How many of us have a garage that can no longer be parked anymore because it is filled up with so much other “stuff?” How many of us have an off-site storage unit because we have too much “stuff” to keep in our homes, so we arrange for visitation rights to see our “stuff?” The late comedian George Carlin famously did an entire monologue on this “stuff” — proclaiming that the “meaning of life is trying to find a place to put your stuff” and that “A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out ...
Hurry up and wait! Hurry up and wait! Anyone who has spent time in the military has heard this and lived this as a part of their daily routine. Rapid flurries of activity are followed by long periods of waiting in line. Waiting seems to be part of life in every context. We wait in lines at grocery stores, department stores, banks, athletic events, concerts, motor vehicle offices, and government agencies. It seems like time passes with the speed of light on our way there and at the pace of a slug after we ...
Joe and Moe were carpenters. Joe was always finding ways to tease Moe, who was not too bright. One night Joe shined his flashlight up to the 2nd story of a house and said, “Moe, would you mind climbing up this light beam and get my hammer for me?’ Moe said, “Ha! How dumb do think I am?’ “I’m sorry,” Joe replied. “You’d better be,” said Moe. “I know you too well . . . you’d let me get halfway up and then turn the light off!’ Well, Moe wasn’t too bright. But it reminds me of a story that’s told on one of the ...
Springtime is the season of uncontained optimism. As the days grow longer, and the sun grows stronger, it feels time to do something outrageous. We dig into the earth, carefully plow and pulverize hard clods into fine loam. We remove the weeds and grasses. We add extra nutrients to enrich the prepared soil. Then into that lush, fertile mixture we gently deposit . . . dried up, shriveled, little (sometimes downright tiny), seemingly completely dead bits of matter. We call them “seeds.” Nothing looks less “ ...
Eureka Springs, Arkansas is the home of the Great Passion Play in the Ozarks. There is a humorous story going around about the actor who at one time played the part of Christ in this passion play. As the actor carried the cross up the hill of Golgotha a tourist began heckling him, making fun of him and shouting insults at him. Finally, the actor had taken as much as he could take. So he threw down his cross, walked over to the tourist . . . and punched him out. After the play was over, the director told ...