I was standing on a street corner. A man, slightly under the weather, came up and started talking, "Hey, buddy, you know that an alligator lays 10,000 eggs. And, you can depend on it." I didn’t reply, hoping he’d go away. But, "And, out of that, 9,000 float away. The fish eat ‘em." "So ..." I started. "And you can depend on it." He continued, "Out of the 1,000 left, other alligators eat up 900." Sarcastically I said, "And, I can depend on that, I suppose." "Yup, you sure can. Furthermore, of the 100 left, ...
Sometimes you and I read the Bible as if it were a blast from the past. In reality, it also sends us future messages about what it means for each of us to be a child of God and a disciple of Jesus Christ. Scripture is often out ahead of us, inviting us to live a richer and nobler life today. In essence, today’s epistle lesson is a fax from tomorrow concerning how Christians are to respond to the great promise of God’s return or reappearance before humankind. A necessary piece of equipment for many modern ...
Many years ago, in my early days in radio, when I was of an age to have the stamina of youth, I did an all-night show - playing phonograph records in the wee hours for a few long- distance truck drivers, weary parents of infants who refused to sleep, and the occasional drunk. (It is amazing what a man will do for money, isn't it?) The show was called "East of Midnight." That has nothing really to do with the message this morning. I mention it simply to let you in on the title of the sermon, "East of Easter ...
Object: You will need a small bag of M&M's for each child as well as a very large bag of M&M's – enough to count out 490 – for your demonstration. Pour your M&M's into a large bowl. Say: Peter, one of Jesus' disciples, asked him how many times he should forgive someone. He wondered if seven times would be enough. What do you think? Should you forgive someone 7 times? What if your brother or sister keeps coming into your room and messing it up. What if they did it every day for a whole week? Do you think ...
There was an article in the newspapers sometime back about a British husband who walked out on a 38-year marriage because he could not stand his wife obsessively moving the furniture. John Turner filed for divorce, complaining he was sick and tired of his wife Pauline shifting chairs, tables, the television--and anything not fixed to the walls--every single day of their married life. "Moving furniture about was just something I did and I always will do," Pauline says. "I suppose everybody has their little ...
Do you remember the opening soliloquy which begins the musical “Fiddler on the Roof?” Tevye, the dairyman who is always carrying on lengthy conversations with God, says to the audience: “A fiddler on the roof. Sounds crazy, no? But in our little village of Anatevka, you might say every one of us is a fiddler on the roof, trying to scratch out a pleasant, simple tune without breaking his neck. It isn’t easy. You may ask, why do we stay up here if it’s so dangerous? We stay because Anatevka is our home. And ...
I heard about an 83-year-old man the other day who had lived his entire life as a bachelor. One day this man gathered his four nephews and announced that he was planning to be married. His nephews were in shock. One spoke up and said, "Uncle are you getting married because this woman is beautiful?" He said, "No." Another nephew asked, "Uncle are you getting married because this woman is a great cook?" Again he said, "No." The third nephew questioned, "Are you marrying this woman because she is rich?" "Of ...
Bill Cosby has suggested that Father's Day is almost as exciting as Ground Hog Day. Among the many problems that he discloses about this observance is the issue of buying a present for Dad. Among the dumbest gifts that Cosby has received on this day of obligatory recognition is soap-on-a-rope-- a remembrance which ranks slightly higher than the time he received a thousand yards of dental floss. There have been other thoughtful gifts, such as a sweater in June (it was on sale), the hedge cutters, weed ...
Call To Worship One: I lift up my eyes to the hills- from where will my help come? All: My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. Women: He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Men: He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. Right Side: The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade at your right hand. Left Side: The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night. One: The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life. All: The Lord ...
The Rock opera, Jesus Christ, Superstar, pictures Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane, asking God if it is really necessary for him to die on the cross. In deep anguish he prays, among other things, "I'd have to know, I'd have to know, my Lord, if I die, what will be my reward?" We don't think or talk much about the reward of the Christian life. I suppose we feel reluctant to ask because we think that, if we are being Christian just for what we get out of it, we are probably doing it for the wrong reason. ...
Genesis 2:4-25, Genesis 3:1-24, Romans 5:12-21, Matthew 4:1-11
Sermon Aid
John R. Brokhoff
COMMENTARY Lesson 1: Genesis 2:15-17; 3:1-7 (C); Genesis 2:7-9; 3:1-7 (RC); Genesis 2:4b-9, 15-17, 25-3:7 (E) The account of humanity's fall into sin. Today's Lesson is taken from the second Genesis account of creation by the Yahwist (J) school of authors. The first part of the pericope gives the setting for the Fall: creation of Adam from dust and spirit, the garden with the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. In preparation for the Fall we need to know that Adam and Eve were ...
An increasing number of responsible pet owners have now “micro-chipped” their dogs and cats. A small “chip” is injected under the skin and when a special scanner is run over the chip, the creature’s whole history is made available—-pet’s name, owner’s name, home address, home phone, vet’s name, vet’s phone, medications taken. It’s all there. Most animal shelters now have these scanners. When a lost or wandering animal is brought in, “scanning” is the first procedure. Often the “lost” is “found,” ...
The beauty business is big business. Adorning ourselves, perfecting every perceived imperfection, curling what is straight, straightening what is curly, bleaching this/highlighting that, products that promise to make youngsters look older and oldsters look younger never lose their appeal. “Stuff” made out of low-tech squished fruit or high-tech spliced genes all promise to adorn and ultimately to transform our faces, save our skin, and sanctify our souls. If only we will buy just this ONE product. An ...
[For this sermon, you will need aprons. Invite the matriarchs and patriarchs of your church to let you use their well-used aprons as props. Or better yet, conduct a fashion show of the aprons used by people in your church.] Unless you have lived in a rural area, you might not know the joys of keeping that most unruly, unpredictable, but absolutely crucial-to-life “pet” known as . . . a septic tank. There are some unbendable rules for septic tanks. 1) They will always back up the day your daughter’s wedding ...
This summer saw the “resurrection” of an old tale of family rivalry and betrayal. The show that started an industry of prime time “soap operas” is back on the air. Do you know show I’m talking about? . . . . Dallas. The ever-evil “J.R.” Ewing and all his battling, back-biting, embittered family have returned, with new generations, all of whom are admirably carrying on the family tradition of unabated greed and hatred. Added to yet another season of “Kardashians” and the History channel’s presentation of “ ...
Lamentations 1:1-6, Lamentations 3:19-26, Luke 17:1-10, 2 Timothy 1:1-14
Bulletin Aid
Julia Ross Strope
Call To Worship Leader: Autumn is coming. The land in the northern hemisphere is slowing down. The church calendar will soon conclude with celebrating “Christ as King.” Today, we acknowledge that Christians in both hemispheres and on all continents read the same scriptures, ask many of the same questions, pray about many of the same things, and desire to work for justice. People: All around the planet, Christians seek guidance for manifesting peace throughout the global village. Leader: We are Christians ...
A minister wrote in the church newsletter that he was setting goals for the New Year. One of his goals was to clean up his desk. Another of his goals was to find last year’s goals. Some of you probably keep desks like that. Some of you will remember the “Calvin and Hobbes” comic strip. In one strip, Calvin and Hobbes are talking about the New Year. Calvin says, “I’m getting disillusioned with these New Years. They don’t seem very new at all. Each New Year is just like the old year. Here another year has ...
5:16 Paul directs his readers to live by the Spirit. The Greek word translated “live” (peripateite) is literally “walk.” Paul uses this word elsewhere when speaking of living the new life in Christ (Rom. 6:4), a life that is conducted by means of the Spirit (Rom. 8:4). The word suggests continuance, progress, and daily attention. Paul commands his readers to avoid gratifying the desires of the sinful nature by means not of law observance but of living by the Spirit. The Greek for “sinful nature” is ...
Exhortation to Resist False Teachers The concern for the “salvation” of “God’s chosen people” expressed in verse 10, plus the exhortation to perseverance, with its warning against apostasy in verses 11–13, bring Paul—and Timothy—back to the hard realities of the situation on Ephesus, with the presence of the false teachers (cf. 1 Timothy). Apparently they continue to plague the church, as Onesiphorus had probably informed him, although clearly not all have capitulated. This concern dominates the appeal ...
Leadership, Learning, Manna, Meat, and the First Sabbath Rest: In Exodus 16, Israel begins learning to walk in the Lord’s way (vv. 4b, 28b). The survival of the people depended on the transformation of their culture. The text presents a jumble of themes around this purpose, some for the first time in Exodus: the grumbling and lessons of the newly redeemed slaves; the status of Moses and Aaron’s leadership; the Lord’s visible presence with the people; and the Lord’s provision of bread, quail, and rest. The ...
Big Idea: God’s overpowering strength plus his overpowering love not only saves us but provides a life of joy. Understanding the Text This psalm belongs to the broad genre of royal psalms. Like Psalm 20, Craigie calls it a royal liturgy,[1] which suggests that it was used in worship. It is as if we are standing outside the temple and hearing the voices of worship, and we have a vague idea of what is going on inside the building as we try to picture the action in our mind’s eye. The question that the form ...
A hesitant driver, waiting for a traffic jam to clear, came to a stop on the expressway ramp. The traffic thinned, but the timid driver still waited. Finally, an infuriated voice came from behind shouting: “The sign says Yield, not give up.” The primary actors in today’s parables neither yielded nor gave up. In fact, that really is the lesson of these parables: The Power of Persistence. Jesus told two parables with almost identical messages about persistence. The stories are different only in their setting ...
The concluding section of early Christian letters often contains the author’s benediction, typically expressed as a prayer or doxology, but often accompanied by many other pastoral conventions as well. In his letters, for example, Paul sometimes closes his correspondence by greeting various acquaintances in a particular congregation (cf. Rom. 16), perhaps to encourage them in their faith (cf. 1 Cor. 16:19–20) or to give them instructions (cf. Col. 4:15–16). In several of his letters, he includes a list of ...
Daniel’s Prayer and the Seventy Weeks: Chapter 9 is unique for three reasons. First, it starts with Daniel reading a prophetic text rather than receiving a vision as in the surrounding chapters (chs. 7, 8, and 10). Second, the particular name of Israel’s God, Yahweh, is only found in this chapter (vv. 2, 4, 8, 10, 13, 14, 20). Third, most of the chapter is taken up with a prayer. Elsewhere, the author makes clear that Daniel believed in talking to God (2:18; 6:10), but only here does he record the lengthy ...
This sermon covers Philippians 1: 1-6 and II Corinthians 5 1-7. Barbara Brockhoft tells us that a few years ago in DeKalb County down in Georgia, a school had a mock drill as a part of the Civil Defense program. In the test drill there was a fourth grade boy who was chosen to be "hit". He was listed as one of the casualties. In the mock test he was struck down by glass, debris and rubble. An ambulance was to be called to the elementary school where the test was conducted, and at the call of the ambulance, ...