[Begin your sermon with a stack of catalogs, holding up and naming each one.] Among the avalanche of pre-Christmas (yikes!) catalogs already clogging up our mailboxes, here is one that manages to distinguish itself from the pack--which of course is it's whole intention. It's put out by the snooty, upscale gadget merchant Hammacher-Schlemmer. The stand-up-and-take-notice quality of this particular edition was not because the merchandise was new, or on sale, or geared towards any particular time of year or ...
In their Easter preparation work in Sunday School, the teacher asked each student, "What does Easter mean to you?" One kid replied: "Easter means egg-salad sandwiches for the next two weeks." Okay, it was a bad answer. But it was a good question. What does Easter mean to you? How does it change your life? Does it mean something more than an opportunity for a new spring outfit, a family dinner, and an excuse to bite the heads off all those annoying little purple and pink marshmallow Peeps? Throughout the ...
It's a sad life-lesson. You probably learned it first as a young child. Leave something out, unattended, not locked-down or locked-up, and it's a pretty safe bet it's going to get stolen. Depending upon where and when you grew up, this lesson might have been learned later or earlier. But I doubt if there's anyone here today who hasn't had the experience of being robbed of something at sometime in their life. (You may want to get stories from your congregation of things they had stolen as children or as ...
Ever have one of those days? The mortgage payment is due. The car is making an ominous, expensive-sounding noise. The kids are suddenly having trouble in school, with friends, and with faith. Deadlines from work are stacking up and toppling over. Your spouse needs some extra care and attention. Then you know what it is to feel as though the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Anyone remember where that saying "the weight of the world" comes from? Recall some long-ago learned mythology and remember ...
It was a typical off-island family outing. A trip to the mall, a stop at a fast-food restaurant: then pick up some pet food at the farm-supply store, and finally an appointment at the tattoo and piercing parlor. WHAT?! Yes, that was the family-day itinerary of one young family we know here on our little island. The mom and daughter both decided to get an eyebrow ring together. The dad got a new tattoo on his shoulder. For them it was a fun way to share time together and enjoy common interests as a family. ...
The more we move into the Advent season, the more our scripture texts bring the Christ-child’s birth closer and closer to us. Yet here in Matthew 11:2-11 we are back to the relationship between Jesus and John the Baptist. Yet even though this is not part of our text for this week, the mere mention of John’s name should remind us of their cousinly kinship, even of an in utero jump for joy that marked their first meeting--making cousin John the first person to celebrate Advent. As out text opens Jesus has ...
One of the first things Patricia and I had to learn when we moved to Big Canoe was how to deal with our garbage. We learned very quickly that if we just let it sit there, it would begin to stink up our lives. It would invite all sorts of pests. It would make our lives unpleasant in a variety of ways. So, as a matter of regular discipline, we had to pack it up, load it in the car, and take it to the dump. We had to get rid of it. Of course, there is more than one kind of garbage. The kind of garbage we put ...
It was in an Ann Landers column some time ago – a letter from a grief stricken mother. Her son had died at the age of 33, weighing 560 pounds. His parents had warned him about the dangers of obesity. But he always replied, “It’s my life. I’ll do what I want with it.” As I read that, I remembered reading about a wife and mother who became bored with her life. One day she left her husband and family to go to Las Vegas with a man who had left his wife. Her only words were, “It’s my life. It’s the only one I’ ...
Psalm 116:1-19, Acts 2:14-41, 1 Peter 1:13-2:3, Luke 24:13-35
Sermon Aid
Marion L. Soards, Thomas B. Dozeman, Kendall McCabe
TEXTS FROM ACTS AND PSALMS In bringing these readings together, the lectionary focuses our attention on making our vows to the Lord in the presence of all his people. The psalm meditates on fulfilling such a vow as an act of thanksgiving for all God's bountiful provisions for us, and the account from Acts shows us certain penitent persons at Pentecost publicly professing repentance and being baptized in the name of Jesus Christ in reaction to Peter's proclamation, "God has made him both Lord and Christ, ...
Psalm 149:1-9, Romans 13:8-14, Matthew 18:15-20, Exodus 12:1-30
Sermon Aid
Marion L. Soards, Thomas B. Dozeman, Kendall McCabe
OLD TESTAMENT TEXTS Exodus 12:1-14 is one of the central descriptions of how the Passover is to be celebrated and how it functions in the life of Israel. Psalm 149 is a two-sided hymn of praise in which God's ability to destroy and to save is acknowledged. Exodus 12:1-14 - "The Passover" Setting. The confusion of the present form of Exodus 11-13 confronts any reader with immediate obstacles to interpretation. At least three different traditions have been brought together in these chapters (by at least two ...
Sometimes I almost feel sorry for hypocrites. Don’t you? Everybody hates a hypocrite. Isn’t that right? We may be able to tolerate diverse groups of people in our society, but one group that does not get compassion is the group made up of people who publicly stand for one thing and do something else. We might be able to stomach a politician who allegedly solicits gay sex, but not when he’s one of Congress’ leading gay bashers. It somehow troubles us when we see someone who expresses concern about global ...
2687. The Wind Blows Where It Will
John 3:1-17
Illustration
Will Willimon
William Willimon, the Chaplain at DukeUniversity, tells of a woman who, with her family had begun to attend his church. Quoting him, he says, "She attended our church when her family vacationed at the coast. She said she had begun attending our church a number of years before because it was the only church on the beach where a black person could feel welcomed. This pleased me. She had had a difficult life and had experienced first hand oppression, tragedy, and hate. One summer she arrived with her family ...
Recently, I discovered a story that touched my heart. Whether it’s a true story or not, I don’t know. It probably belongs in the category of an “urban legend”… but whatever the case, it makes a good point. The story is about a man who was driving home from work one day in rush hour traffic when suddenly his car began to choke and sputter… and then the engine just died. Fortunately, the man was able to coast into a service station. He tried his engine again. It wouldn’t even turn over. As he pulled out his ...
Let me begin with three quick stories. See if you can find the common thread that runs through them. The First Story is about a woman who lives in Texas. She is a motivational speaker who is often asked to give the key-note address at conventions and convocations. Recently she returned home after speaking five nights in a row. Her husband said: “Honey, I know you must be really tired. Why don’t you “sleep in” in the morning?” That sounded good to her, so she did stay in bed longer than usual. When she ...
Have you heard the story about the young police officer who was on the witness stand testifying in the trial of a man he had arrested for robbery? The defendant was being represented by a hard-nosed attorney who was known far and wide for being tough on police officers. In cross-examination, the tough lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman’s credibility and the exchange between the fiery lawyer and the young policemen went like this. The lawyer speaks first. “Officer… did you see (with your own eyes ...
2691. A Good Mom
2 Timothy 1:5
Illustration
Andrew M. Greeley
Once upon a time there was a Mom, who tried her best to be a good Mom and to be fair with all her children. Her children, like all children, didn't really appreciate this and were always telling her she did more for one or the other of them than she did for all of them. "You love her (him) more than you do me", was an oft heard refrain from one or the other. Though the Mom felt bad about her children's reaction, she just continued to do the best she could to keep them all satisfied. She encouraged their ...
Best-selling author Robert Fulghum is well-known for his “all-I-really-need-to-know-I-learned-in-kindergarten” books. Less well known is the fact that he spent many years in the pulpit in Washington State. He writes about his preaching days and his fear of Mother’s Day in these words: For twenty-five years of my life, the second Sunday of May was trouble . . . I was obliged in some way to address the subject of Mother’s Day. It could not be avoided . . .The congregation was quite open-minded and gave me ...
"Nearly everyone will lie to you given the right circumstances." Do you know who said that? None other than Bill Clinton, the President of the United States. But guess what? Apparently he is right. In the groundbreaking work, The Day America Told the Truth, by James Patterson and Peter Kim, we find that in America honesty has gone out the window. 91% of Americans lie regularly at home and at work. In answer to the question, "Whom have you regularly lied to?" 86% said, to their parents; and 75% to their ...
This is the beginning of a series of messages on the Ten Commandments I have entitled, "Playing by the rules: God's game plan for godliness." We live in a universe that is governed by certain rules. In fact, if there were no rules, the cosmos would become chaos. If 2 + 2 did not always = 4, mathematics would be impossible; if E did not = MC2 , physics would go out the window. Without rules, football, basketball, baseball, and every other sport would be a thing of the past. If we did not have rules, ...
Probably the mother of all misprints in any book, came in the misprint of a Bible. In 1631 someone discovered a word that was missing in a newly published version of the Bible, called The King James Version. The missing word was "not" in the seventh commandment which then made the Authorized Version to read, "Thou shalt commit adultery." From then on, this 1631 addition of the Bible became known as the "Wicked Bible."[1] Well, this seems to be the Bible the world is wanting to read today. Without question ...
There are many things you could say about the fictional character Robin Hood. He was handsome, dashing, romantic, courageous, compassionate, kind, and loyal. But, at bottom, he was a thief. Even though he robbed from the rich and gave to the poor, the end does not justify the means. Regardless of his motive, Robin Hood was both a robber and a hood who broke the eighth commandment "You shall not steal." America has become a nation full of Robin Hoods. USA Today magazine ran an article entitled, "How Honest ...
The church is taking a beating. On the outside the picture looks bright. Its affluence is at an all-time high. The church is taking in more money and spending out more money than ever before in all of her glorious history. Just take for example the Southern Baptist Convention. Last year 40,000 Southern Baptist churches took in $6 billion, and now owns property valued at $30 billion. The same could be said for practically every major denomination in America. But a closer look reveals a darker picture. First ...
Ten years: a decade, 520 weeks, 3,652 days, 87,600 hours. A lot can change in ten years: less hair, more weight, deeper wrinkles. As I stand here this day, ten years to the day when I became pastor of this church, my mind is literally boggled at where I am today, and where we are today, and the journey we have made together over the last ten years. As I struggled to discern the message I should bring this Sunday, I had several different texts and thrusts dancing in my head, when sitting at the Executive ...
Contrary to what you might think, "Out with the old in with the new" is not the title of an Elizabeth Taylor Seminar on marriage. But it is the title of my message as we leave an old year and enter a new year. I was interested to learn that the month of January is named after the Roman god Janus, who was a god that had two faces. One face looked back to the old year; the other face looked forward to the new year. On the last day of any year, I think we all have two faces. One face looks backward to a year ...
I want to confess that I am a Tarzan movie buff. I love all of the old Tarzan movies, especially the ones with Johnny Weismuller. Even though I have seen every alligator he has ever killed, every elephant he has ever called, and every vine he has ever swung from, I never get tired of watching his movies. I guess that's why this story is both so funny and so meaningful to me. It seems as if Tarzan was not himself, and Jane was very worried. It was apparent that Tarzan was developing a problem, a very ...